


To the Void with That!

by BobCat_97



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: And Lots of It, Blood and Violence, Character Death, Comfort, Don't like it then leave, Dorian is bae, Drinking, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, More tags to be added, My choices, Playful but wise Inquisitor, Romance, Sappy everything, Sappy speeches, Spoilers, Very possible smut, Vivienne is a lovable bitch, sappy love, slight AU, slight depression
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-13
Updated: 2016-04-24
Packaged: 2018-05-01 09:05:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 29
Words: 53,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5200124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BobCat_97/pseuds/BobCat_97
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Evelyn woke up dazed and confused. Torn from her daily life of training to be a proper lady, she was thrown into a world of war and demons. As Evelyn deals with the impending doom onto the world, she struggles with the past that quickly caught up to her and wouldn't let her go. So as she fixes Thedas, can Evelyn Trevelyan fix herself?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Never Fear the Unknown

So much pain. So much to where it was unbearable. Her whole arm felt like it was sizzling, like fire was crawling up it and only it. She prayed with her eyes close that someone, anyone could rid her of her burden. To chop the offending limb off so she can finally sleep in acheless peace. But that was never meant to be. As soon as she regained conscious, she was yanked up and bound in even more chains. She sat in silence as the guards stared their obvious hatred with silver blades pointing at her, quiet promises of death if she were to move.

Without announcement, her hand sparked an angry green glow and caused her to cry out at the burning pain that consumed it without remorse. Her cry turned to heavy breathing as she tried to steady her racing heart and bear the pain. And just when she thought she suppressed the feeling, a pissed off woman stormed into the room (dungeon?) and roughly pulled her arm up. “Explain this.” Angry woman demanded without introduction. But Evelyn said nothing as she clenched her teeth against the urge to voice her pain.

Yet, after several deep breaths, Evelyn looked up at the woman with wide eyes. “I-I can’t..” She stumbled over her words as she tried to recollect the past events that took place. The harder she thought, the more Evelyn realized that memories were missing. Gone and she couldn’t explain why.

“What do you mean you can’t?” Angry woman seethed, surging forward to strike Evelyn for her ignorance. Evelyn stared blankly at her as another woman stopped Angry woman.

“I don’t know what that is or how it got there.” Evelyn eventually snapped, her brows knitting together in frustration. She tried to think. Tried to ignore the pain in her arm and think. Her shoulders sank in defeat, her eyebrows relaxing. “What did happen?”

“A big explosion toppled the Conclave. Many died..even her most Holy..” Angry woman didn’t sound angry this time. She sounded..heartbroken.

Evelyn was stunned beyond belief. She remembered being there, at the Conclave but what happened afterwards remained a dark void of nothing. “All those people..dead.”

“Do you remember what happened?” A smooth, Orlesian accent made Evelyn’s eyes latch onto the other woman.

“I remember running. Things were chasing me..” Evelyn paused, closing her eyes in effort to remember. “Then a woman?” Her head pounded, ached and words were exchanged between the two women but none of it mattered to Evelyn. Suddenly, Angry woman gently helped Evelyn to her feet without explaining.

“Where are you taking me?” With a sigh, the woman looked into Evelyn’s eyes.

“Tis better if I showed you.”

**********

Cullen exhaled deeply as he sheathed his sword; all this fighting finally doing a number on him. As much as he wanted to rake his hand through his hair, he couldn't. His hands were covered in demon gore, the stench stomach churning. All he wanted to do was sit and curse the Maker. Cullen didn't need this. He just left the wounded Kirkwall and now he's ass deep in demons. He wanted to revert back to being a naive templar but no. The Maker has greater, stressing plans for the commander and Cullen was losing faith that he could fix this mess.

"Commander!" A familiar voice pulled Cullen from his thoughts. A woman jogged up with silent footsteps, her face slightly shadowed by the purple hood she's wearing.

"Leliana." Cullen greeted his old friend, clasping her hand in a firm handshake. He waited till her breathing caught up to her, his eyes staring at the woman whom was friends with his ex-crush.

Standing tall, Leliana regarded him with hopeful eyes that never showed before once she became the Left Hand of the Divine. "The prisoner is awake and Cassandra is bringing her to the Breach." She finally announced in her soft accent that could send women or men weak to their knees.

"I don't know whether that is good news or not.." Cullen muttered more to himself rather than Leliana. She didn't say anything; only placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. Cullen was thankful for her silent understanding but he would be even more thankful if she told him to go take a very long rest.

That'll never happen.


	2. Miracles Can Happen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evelyn becomes baffled at her new ability and stubbornly denies she was sent from the Maker. Where as Cullen is left speechless by a woman yet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi. Yeah, I'm new to writing this fan-fic stuff! So please be patient with me and hope you'll stick to the very end of the Inquisitor's story!

"Great. I'm new to Fereldan and I already have people hating me. Good job, me." Evelyn said sarcastically as she dispatched the last demon her and Angry woman was fighting. Whatever this woman wanted from Evelyn, Evelyn was quite sure she couldn't deliver. Her hope was rubbish. From what Evelyn can see, this 'Breach' will swallow them whole and there was nothing to stop it. And this mark? It is nothing but a curse. She hated it. She wanted it gone. Angry woman thinks that getting Evelyn to the Breach can help stop it..Bullshit. 

"I hear fighting!" Angry woman announced as she rushed ahead of Evelyn. With a sigh, Evelyn placed her daggers onto her back and followed the running warrior.

"Who's fight?" Evelyn asked yet she answered her own question when she came to a sliding stop to gaze at a green tear hovering above. Angry woman didn't bother explaining what it was or who was down below fighting, before jumping down to join the fray. "Shit.." Evelyn cursed as she drew her blades then followed to help the unknown people. 

Evelyn fought fiercely. She hated being here. She hated being forced to do things without her consent. She hated it all. The cold, the demons, the constant fighting and near death experiences. All she wanted to do was go home and have her parents continue parading her around like some prize. At least she can be prepared for that but this shit? No. No one can be prepared for this crap.

Side-stepping out of a grasping claws path, Evelyn spun on her heel to drive her blade into a demon's neck. The vile thing screeched, its arms flinging up as an attempt to hit her or anything really. Yet before she can kill the blasted thing, a bolt went through the head of the demon, ending its life. Evelyn didn't say thank you. Why should she? She didn't know these people nor did she want help in the first place. So she didn't bother looking for the source of the arrow. She turned to the nearest demon and started her dance all over again.

Evelyn cut deep and fast. One jab followed by a swift kick and a jump back, only to fling herself back at the demon with daggers raised. Cutting in a x motion at the demon's back, she watched it fall forward before screeching one final time then dying. Stepping out of the demon gore, Evelyn was surprised when an elf took her marked hand and held it up to the green mass. Then she screamed.

She didn't know what connected with what first but she could feel the tear pulling at her mark and her mark resisting the action. It's like the flow was competing for dominance. And oh it hurt so so much. She wanted it to stopped but the damn bald elf next to her wouldn't let Evelyn go. She had to stop it. She had to stop the pain, the torture. So Evelyn withdrew her hand quickly, pulling it, yanking it. The connection broke and the tear closed as a result of her action.

"And sealed." The elf spoke in a smug tone. "I theorized that that somehow that mark on your hand and the rifts were connected and with enough force, it could be sealed."

"I did that?" She gazed at her hand, feeling it pulse with power she didn't know she had. Power she wished she didn't have. Add that to one more thing she didn't ask for and one more thing she wanted to get rid of.

"Lady Cassandra, the prisoner is no mage but the mark is some sort entirely." The elf ignore Evelyn's question as he spoke to the Angry woman instead. His words, his actions, made her eyebrow twitch with annoyance. She wanted to twist his ears and yell her name so they all will stop calling her prisoner. Oh how she wished.

"Come, we're nearly there." Angry woman, Cassandra her name was apparently, notified Evelyn. She sheathed her sword and hopped at small wooden blockade without looking back to see if the others were following. Evelyn sighed. She lost count of how many times she did that. And a dwarf she didn't know was there took notice of her distress.

"Varric Tethras, at your service. And this baby right here is Bianca." The hairy chested dwarf grinned up at her. She laughed. She laughed when she heard his Free Marcher accent and at how he named his crossbow.

"You named your crossbow Bianca?" Evelyn asked in disbelief. She started to walk only when Varric did, finding some comfort in where he was from.

"And that is one story I'll never tell." He winked at her before climbing over the blockade, something Evelyn easily jumped over with her nimble legs. When the talking stopped, her negative thoughts resumed. She wished she could stop them but they kept flowing in one after another. "Oh and hey, kid.." The dwarf's voice broke her out from her trance.

"Evelyn. Please..can you call me that?" Evelyn begged quietly, her eyes focusing on the path under them.

"Evelyn." Varric started all over again, "stay strong, okay?"

*****************

Cullen wanted to throw his sword at the next demon that attempt to ruin a soldier's chance at getting to safety. Leliana's agents kept giving him a constant flow of reports on how close the prisoner was getting. He was growing impatient and tired. Restless even. He wanted to march up to the Breach and find some way to seal it himself. Yet he was just a man, an ex-templar giving up on lyrium.

"Hurry! Seal the Rift!" A man's voice demanded. Cullen spun around to see a group of four running up to him and the thing floating above him. The man who gave the order, an elf, finished off a demon as a woman with mismatched daggers went sprinting through the group and towards the tear.

"Out of the way!" The woman ordered, her voice soft enough that the order didn't sound as commanding as she probably wanted it to be. Yet, Cullen dashed out of the way as the raven haired woman slid to a stop with her hand raised above her head. A green stream connected her hand with the rift and he stared in awe at what was unfolding before him. The prisoner, he guessed, yelled out with a pull of her hand and the connection broke..the rift sealing.

"Commander, meet Lady Trevelyan. She's the prisoner Leliana spoke of." Cassandra explained as she jogged up to the stunned commander. "We're in the process of taking her to the Breach. Do you think you and your men can clear a path for us?"

Clearing his throat, he tore his eyes from the mysterious woman as she spoke to Varric, and sheathed his sword once more. "I'm not sure I can risk more soldiers at this point...We're so few now." A laugh drew his attention once more. The prisoner punched Varric lightly in the arm, her blue eyes twinkling with humor.

"But Commander-"

"Then don't. Take your men and pull back." Trevelyan cut the Seeker off. Cullen didn't know she was listening in on their conversation. Not when she was just laughing with Varric just a few seconds ago. "Why risk men for a plan that might not succeed?" For a woman wearing tattered clothing and blood, she had this commanding aura around her. It made her small stature seem taller than it actually was.

"But my lady-" Cassandra started to protest but was cut off when Trevelyan held her gloved hand up, her unmarked one.

"How can you fight with the thought of risking lives weighs your mind?" Those summer blue sky-like eyes stared at Cassandra when she asked the question. When she got no response, Trevelyan turned her attention to Cullen. "Commander, have your men pull back, is that clear? Now, if you want to follow, you're more than welcome to but!.." She paused, raising an ink colored eyebrow as if testing him for defiance. "You are to evacuate your men first and get patched up. Don't want those wounds infected, now do we?" And with that, she waved her hand for her companions to follow and she was on her way to the ruins of the temple.

"Commander" Cassandra nodded farewell to Cullen then ran to catch up with the leaving group. 

He cleared his throat, his hand itching to rubbed the back of his neck as he attempted to not comment on how much of a woman Lady Trevelyan was.

What a woman she was indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave comments and suggestions on what I should add or improve on.


	3. It's Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's always a reason for everything. Is Evelyn's past her reason for hesitation?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again. Sorry for the long update. I'm a big gamer, sometimes on PC and sometimes on PlayStation but I'll try to update as quickly as possible!

_"Poor child, would you please just sit down?" A tired woman's voice, edging on the age 50, pleaded. Her smokey gray eyes narrowed at the sewing she was currently doing to a torn pair of trousers._

_"Really? You want to sit down and talk? I do hope you know that the only one that'll be the talking is you." Evelyn snapped before turning on her heel and continued her pacing in front of the warm fireplace. Another sigh followed after Evelyn's statement but said nothing against it. Her mother's silence proved how true it was and it sickened Evelyn. She could never voice her opinion. She had to sit like a proper lady and listen to her parents dictate her life left and right._

_"Evelyn, listen to your mother." The father finally spoke up from his spot behind the mother's chair. His hands were gripping the back of it, mostly out of trying to resist striking Evelyn._

_Laughing, Evelyn stopped mid stride, her skirts swaying slightly around her legs. "Maker forbid I finally stand up for myself! I'm 24 now!" She reminded her arrogant parents. "I do believe it's time for me to make my own bloody decisions!"_

_"I forbid it!" Madam Trevelyan dropped her work and stood up at her words. The stress the year brought weren't kind on the poor woman. Her once full head of thick brown hair now had several strands of gray and new wrinkles formed on her forehead and around her mouth. No doubt from all the frowning._

_"My dear.." Lord Trevelyan strode around the chair to place a gentle hand on his wife's shoulder, in a way to show support and comfort. However, the madam didn't relax, her shoulders hitched forward in a show of anger. The lord knew that he couldn't calm his wife so he decided to do the rest of the talking._

_"Evelyn, you are aware that you are our only daughter, yes?" Her father asked the question with a raised eyebrow, his voice full of patience the lord was famous for._

_"But daddy.." Evelyn took a few steps towards her father. Her favorite. It was always said she took after him the most but her sharp looks and full lips came from her grouchy mother. "It wasn't until I was 18 when I was given lessons of ladyship. Before that, you've trained me alongside my brothers. Why must that have to change?" Her voice lost it's previous anger and was replaced with confusion. Her eyebrows drew together and her rose painted lips curved down into a small frown._

_The lord sighed..again. He looked down at his wife but she was too busy looking at the rug underneath them. "It was a mistake on my part. Now more than ever we have to spread the Trevelyan reach, the land, and blood. A man with outstanding power can make that happen."_

_Evelyn bristled. So I'll be a baby making machine now? She thought as her hands curled into fists, her anger now resurfacing._

_"My brothers can easily do that! They already have a few brats as it is!" Evelyn protested, her voice rising with each word. Her handmaiden, a skinny yet pretty elf, tsked under her breath. She thought this was all ridiculous. She knew how much Evelyn wanted to lay down her roll as Lady and go venture the lands._

_"You silly little thing." Evelyn's mother broke her steady silence with a laugh. The woman shook off her husband's hand and stepped into Evelyn's personal space. "Nothing you can possibly say will change things. We already made an agreement with the neighboring lord and his eldest son."_

_Evelyn froze. Whatever words that formed on her tongue completely dissolved, her unblinking eyes staring at her mother as if she had two heads._

_"W-what?" Evelyn felt like she couldn't breath._

_"You are to accompany young Lord Velmont to the Conclave in show of support and loyalty. As you know, the Velmont family is well devoted to the Templar Order." Her father explained, not pausing to give Evelyn a chance to protest. "After things are settled, you are to go with him back to his estate..." Finally a pause, "not ours."_

_Her stomach dropped and all blood drained from her face. "I-I..."_

_"Arik will join with you to and fro. No use in convincing your brother into anything, either, he knows what is best and this is it." Her mother finished what her father failed to add. There was no guilt shining in those cold eyes and it hurt Evelyn to know she can be bargained out like this, though it wasn't the first. "And do try to love him, my dear, or the marriage would be most dreadful. Oh and he expects three males. Don't disappoint him."_

_Evelyn ran from the room._

**************

Excited chatter woke Evelyn from her restless slumber. No matter. Not like she was enjoying the dream anyway.

She stood and took in the small cabin she occupied for the time being with her eyes and heavily sighed. She caused a victory to happen. Apart from her swiftness in closing the rifts around the temple, she successfully closed the rift that halted the breach for the moment. She remembered the cheers erupting around her once the pride demon fell and her hand ceasing the rift. Cassandra had patted her back, the woman had warmed up to Evelyn once she showed her effort in trying to help.

No more died that day when Evelyn learned how to seal the rift, once Solas roughly showed her how. No more people were calling her 'Prisoner' which was a blessing in itself.

"Oh! I'm sorry! I didn't know you were awake!" A high pitched, frantic voice followed the sudden crash. Turning, Evelyn noticed a kind looking elven woman standing there in bland clothes.

"It's okay. I only-"

Her sudden drop to the floor stopped Evelyn's sentence. "I am but a humble servant, my lady." Standing, the elf fiddled with her hands nervously as she backed away. "Lady Pentaghast wants to see you. At once she said." And with that, Evelyn was left standing there confused at what just happened.

"Oh nevermind." Evelyn shook her head before noticing the neatly folded pile of clothes sitting on the desk across the room. It was a horrid sets of beige lounge clothes that made her nose curl in disgust. Narrowing her eyes, Evelyn instead picked up a new set of armor and put that on instead. Once she slid on the small leather coat, she donned her hands in fingerless gloves made from the same leather. It was comfortable and warm and it made her capable for moving freely without restraint. It was something she needed for being a fast moving rogue.

Evelyn thought about tying her hair back but she left it down, finally deciding that she would get it cut as soon as possible. Whenever that would be. So once she corrected her makeup around her almond shaped eyes, she walked over to the cabin door and once she opened it, she was greeted by soldiers and merchants, townsfolk and Chantry sisters, bowing to her in one way or form.

Her eyebrows almost reached her hairline as she stepped out from the cabin and closed the door behind her. Well...this is weird. She concluded. Nodding to the people no doubt staring at her in awe, she followed the path that'll lead her to the Chantry. It was weird. So weird. The staring was unnerving and it was the feeling she well knew from before the Conclave.

As Evelyn neared the Chantry, she heard yelling. Yet she was familiar with one angry voice and Evelyn laughed at it. The other voice was some angry man with a gruff voice that was vaguely familiar but she didn't care about that one. However, she did care about him ordering for her execution once she strolled into the room at the end of the hall.

"Excuse me?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any comments or suggestions would be most welcome! :D


	4. Hope?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen knows that he may never settle down and have a family but when he sees her..he feels hope? Evelyn is stubborn to realize her sudden change of feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have any comments or suggestions, please drop them down in the comment section below!

Cullen watched the Herald walk into the Chantry with sure strides, never faltering to hesitation. Yet he knew that was just a front. She kept her chin up and eyes straight ahead to show the gathered people she was strong, that she was meant to be here but he noticed the stiffness of her shoulders and the trembling in her hands.

"She sure is something, huh?" A deep, masculine voice flowed up from below. Cullen shifted his stance from the side of Leliana's tent then gazed down at the dwarf he's known for many years now. But his appearance raises a question. How is he not cold with his chest showing like that?

"The ability to press on like that in a place so unfamiliar," Cullen paused, his amber eyes moving back to stare at the Chantry doors and her distancing back. "It sure is something."

Once the final rift was sealed in the temple, Cullen watched the cheers bloom through the ruins. He showed up too late to join the fight but he did witness the rift being sealed by the raven haired mystery woman. He kept his eyes on her as he jumped down to greet them.

The lady smiled a small smile, the happiness not reaching her eyes and that's when he noticed the paleness to her once tan cheeks. Cassandra seemed to notice also for the Seeker cupped the Herald's shoulders, concern masking her face. And just like that, the woman fainted. Cassandra held fast onto the limp body as Cullen rushed forward to relieve the Seeker of the heavy weight. However, she wasn't all that heavy. She was quite light for her height.

 _We need to get her back to Haven. This is finally taking a toll on her._ Her elven mage companion informed as he studied her marked hand then her face. _She's burning. We must leave now_.

For three days there was a constant flow of healers walking in and out of the Herald's cabin. The word of her comatose state spread like wildfire causing worry to etch into everyone's hearts for their savior. Her actions at the temple caused many to drop the title and thoughts of her being prisoner, a killer, and now viewed her as a blessing. Yet Cullen knew that Lady Trevelyan wouldn't care for such treatment. She did what she had to and wouldn't ask for anything in return. Well..maybe to let her return to the Free Marches but that wouldn't happen.

"Not quite as soft hearted as the Queen of Ferelden or Hawke but she'll be just as loved as them." Varric stated before patting the Commander's arm and walking away towards the warm fire down below. Cullen let his eyes drop at the mention of the queen, his old crush. She was a fierce warrior that saved the Circle he was stationed at. He was breathless at the hope that shined in her emerald eyes, her decision to save the mages resolute. And he knew from the second meeting that she only had eyes for her fellow Grey Warden but he was happy when she called him friend.

And now that he thought back to the queen, Evelyn was almost the polar opposite. The queen never smirked or grinned with mischief. She always smiled brightly or frowned at the hurt. She never showed any signs of hesitation, never. Whenever she wrote to him when she had the time before she suddenly vanished, her words held promises and goals. But Evelyn seemed to have a selfish side, a dark side. Cullen was sure something or someone caused her to be that way and he's going to find out some way or another. Somehow.

 

************

Evelyn stared at 'her' advisers standing at the other side of the table while Cassandra prattled on about who they were. A Spymaster, a Commander, and an Ambassador. All there here to help Evelyn with whatever the hell she's supposed to do to fix this mess and a mess it is. Pockets of rebels everywhere, wrecking havoc. The Chantry has falling in panic. Demons are pouring through rifts across Thedas. The killer of the Divine recently discovered. And now she's the Herald of Andraste to everyone in and out of the Inquisition.

"What?" Evelyn blinked at her ambassador, Josephine she believed her name was. Evelyn was confused, shocked, and angry all at the same time. Finally she settled to laughing at how crazy and grand that sounded. "Oh I bet the Chantry is none too pleased about that." Evelyn pushed away from the wall she was leaning against while she used a small, thin bladed dagger to picked at the dirt underneath her fingernails.

"I bet their faces went as red as their robes." Cullen, the commander of her forces apparently, joked with a small deep chuckle. Her eyes fastened onto his amber ones, something she grew to like about the man. Well, other than the very distracting, hot scar above his top lip. Gotta love a man with scars and his voice, rich and deep with his Ferelden accent. It made her slightly swoon. 

"How much you betting, Commander?" Evelyn raised a single eyebrow as she grinned at the blond man with impeccable groomed hair. She expected a serious remark or a rejection to her sarcastic offer but she got a gorgeous grin back, that blasted scar drawing her attention to it.

 "There is a Chantry cleric by the name of Mother Giselle in the Hinterlands that would like to speak to you." Leliana cut through, her voice light with her Orlesian accent and Evelyn figured Leliana knew her thoughts.

"And search for opportunities to spread the Inquisition influence while you're there." Cullen added, resting his leather gloved hands on the hilt of his sword in a manner that was distracting and alluring to Evelyn.

Clearing her throat, Evelyn nodded in confirmation that she knew what she had to do. "Right, got it. I'll leave as soon as I get prepared." And with that, one by one her advisers left the room but Cullen was last to leave. When he made to make his departure, Evelyn stepped into his way, cutting him off with her arms folded over her chest.

"Just to let you know," she pointed to her upper lip, right where his scar would be. "That scar is horribly distracting and Maker forbid but I love it." Evelyn was never one to hold her feelings back. When she loved or hated something, she voiced it loudly. Honesty was her best friend but sadly it hasn't been for these past couple of days.

Cullen laughed, his amber eyes sparkling with amusement and she wanted to hit him for looking so good. "Well my lady, sorry to say this but those eyes will be the end of me if fate shall have it." He retorted, much to Evelyn's surprise. She stood there, gaping at him like a fool as her face blow up with heat. She tore her eyes from his unnerving gaze.

"I-I...Whatever." She stuttered, lost for words because of his confession. He laughed once more, giving her that damn smirk once more before he stepped around her and started to leave the room. His hand brushed her hand as he did so and she felt this un-explainable warmth spread from that single touch.

"Be careful out there, Herald. I'd hate to see that pretty face vanish suddenly." He called back, his words causing people nearby to stare in shock before gossiping about what could possibly happen.

Evelyn spun around, her face red again from his relentless flirting. "Then you best do what you dream of doing before something like that happens!" She barked back. This time it was his turn to freeze up and sputter like an idiot. A small victory Evelyn took pride in but she had a feeling she'd regret her words when he turned around and gave her a mischievous smile.

"Then you know where to find me." 


	5. Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn shows just how capable she is dealing with things and Cullen loves every bit of it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! I've been sort of tied up with things but hopefully after this upcoming holiday is over, I can release these chapters quicker.

_Dear Nightingale,_

 

_Things are worse over here in the Hinterlands. Worse than what your scouts let on. Templars and Mages are attacking innocents out of paranoia..It's saddening. An elven woman lost her husband because Templars deemed him a threat and they even took her wedding ring. These horrid actions forced me to rush into their hideouts and put an end to their actions. So, thankfully, the refugees at the Crossroads are much safer unless the Dragon I saw just moments ago decides to terrorize them. I seriously hope not._

_On top of me ending the rebellion, I've secured horses from Master Dennet and the horse-master himself. In just a few short days, he would be at Haven so please prepare a room for him to stay in. Also, I met with that Chantry Mother you told me about. She insisted that I go to Val Royeaux and appeal to the gathering Clerics there. I mentally called her crazy for even saying that. But that shall be discussed at Haven rather than through a letter._

_Oh and I've recruited agents. I hope they're capable of spreading the Inquisition's influence across Thedas._

_I should be back at Haven soon._

_The Herald of Bad luck,_

_Evelyn Trevelyan_

"Our Herald seems to know what she is doing." Leliana stated with a pleased smile after she finished reading the letter to the advisers standing in the war room. 

"Do you think it is wise for her to go to Val Royeaux? Something bad could happen if she goes." Josephine asked, concern clouding her voice. 

Cullen stayed silent for several seconds as he stared down at the map before. "We will weigh the pros and cons once the Herald returns. Till then, we will hope that she accomplishes even more in the Hinterlands." Cullen's words met no argument from the two women in the room. Rather, he got a firm nod from Leliana and silence from the Antivian woman. 

It amazed Cullen how Evelyn could do so much in just three days of being in the Hinterlands. After seeing the heroics of Lady Trevelyan, refugees came to Haven, her actions giving them much needed hope.

"I need to respond to the Herald." Leliana informed before she left the room with the grace of an Orlesian woman. 

"Commander." Josephine said in farewell, bowing her head before making her own exit. Cullen was left standing there, alone.  _I suppose I could send my own letter as well. Wouldn't she just love that._ Cullen smirked to himself and he wished Trevelyan was here so she could get flustered over such an action.

***************

_Dear Lady Herald,_

_As you well know refugees, in awe of your actions in the Hinterlands, came to Haven to aid our mission and for sanctuary. It's amazing what you have done for those people. And even though you're risking your life just being there and helping, don't risk it even more by going after that dragon. It can wait. I know how brash and reckless you are but you need proper equipment before facing such a beast. So if you're sitting there thinking about charging head on towards it, don't. Stop right there._

_Also, as requested, we prepared a room for Master Dennet. And expect a heated argument when you return. The Nightingale and the Ambassador has different views on you going to Val Royeaux but I'm sure you will do what is best, you've been doing that since day one._

_Commander with a smirk,_

_Cullen_

Evelyn laughed at the closing once she finished reading the second letter she received today.  _I bet he smirked when he wrote that. Silly man._ Evelyn thought to herself when she folded the letter and stashed it in her pouch.

"That smile just yells who wrote that letter." Varric announced from the other side of the campfire. The beardless dwarf grinned at her, his eye filled with mischief.

"Oh shush you." Evelyn grinned back, no heat in her words. "I will smile at whatever I want, good dwarf." Varric laughed as he oiled and cleaned Bianca. 

"You and Commander Curly, huh?" 

Evelyn flushed then averted her eyes to the fire before. "There is nothing between us. We just take pleasure in teasing one another." She explained but once she realized that she said sounded wrong, she dropped her face into her hands and groaned. "Shut up, dwarf." 

Laughing, Varric held his hands up. "Hey, it's your love life." 

"I don't have a love life!"

"Sure, sure. A woman of high standings must've had a few lovers here and there." Varric assumed, resuming his task. Evelyn looked at Varric and sighed at how wrong he was.

"If things went according to plan at the Conclave, I would be wedded and bound to a terrible marriage." She said quietly. Varric looked up with raised eyebrows, questions most likely forming in his creative head.

"Oh? Do tell, my lady!" 

Evelyn rocked a little on the uncomfortable logs she sat on. "Well..Much like everything else in my life, my dreadful parents arranged a marriage before I got the balls to leave the estate and venture out into the unknown." She paused, her eyebrows drawing together as she remembered how her fiancee looked. "I got engaged to a boring looking man who demanded I sit and knit all day and give him male children."

"Where is he now?" Varric asked. He stopped cleaning Bianca as soon as Evelyn started her story for the first time.

Laughing, Evelyn shook her head. "Most likely dead. First part of my duty as future Lady Velmont, was to support his family of Templars at the Conclave." She didn't know whether or not she felt sorry that her fiancee died. In truth, she didn't really feel anything.

"Poor bastard."

"Poor bastard indeed." Evelyn then went silent, lost in thought.

"I could never see you getting married though. You're too rebellious for that." Varric stated with a simple smile. Oh, how the dwarf was right. That was the last thing she wanted to do. She hated the thought of settling down and wasting away while raising a horde of children she really didn't want. She had a thirst for adventure and damn her parents for trying to take that away.

"But if there is a man out there willing to handle that rebellious streak in me, then I'll gladly think of settling down." Evelyn sighed.

A man with a smirk filled her head.


	6. Realization

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn finally spills her feelings and Cullen calmly listens.

Everyone knew when Evelyn returned to Haven from Val Royeaux for she ranted, loudly, to her traveling companions as she slammed open every gate or door she traversed through. Oh, how she was aggravated with how things went at that dreadful place. Cassandra looked hopeful with how things went. How? Evelyn has no bloody clue. Her not so helpful advisers said that her trip there opened new opportunities for possible alliances. Crazy, the lot of them.

"Lady Herald, please take time to consider our options. It's not like we have been presented with many." Cassandra begged, her Nevarren accented voice low for only Evelyn to her. All Evelyn could do was sigh and nod her head but not promise anything with words. But that seemed to satisfy the Seeker, the woman finally leaving Evelyn's side, only for Leliana to go on about the Grey Warden disappearances and a man known as Blackwall she should seek out.

As soon as she was gifted with peace once Leliana walked away, Evelyn let her shoulders slump down and her head hang in defeat. She was so tired. She barely got a break when she came back from the Hinterlands, only for her to be rushed to Val Royeaux. And it was dreadful. She was embarrassed in front of many notable nobles by the Chantry Clerics, even the 'templars' that came to add more heat to the fire. She wanted to viciously back hand every single person that judged her wicked and evil.

And weak.

"Lady Trevelyan?" A cautious, male, warm, husky voice broke Evelyn from her thoughts. Her head snapped up and she corrected her posture, something that was forcefully trained to her by her strict mother.

"Commander." Evelyn said in greeting with a firm nod, her eyes unblinking. She knew he saw her in her pathetic state so why must she try to act like she was still calm and collected? "My apologies.." she sighed, letting her shoulders fall a degree. "I seem to be lost in thought."

"Understandable. I heard things didn't go so well in Val Royeaux." Cullen dismissed her lacking state of composure as he walked up to stand in front of her. Evelyn was thankful for his quick understanding and trust that she knew the right thing to do. But why? They've known each other for such a short time yet...it felt so right to trust him with her insecurities and selfishness.

Drawing a shaky breath, she ran a tan, dainty hand through her thick black locks; only for the unsettled hair to fall back over the sides of her face. "Oh yeah, some unladylike thoughts ran through my mind and they seemed to appealing to carry out." That pulled a laugh from the stern, worried commander, his own composure relaxing once he knew she wouldn't lash out at him out of irritation.

"I'm all ears if you need to rant, my lady." His honey colored eyes showed so much promise, Evelyn was immediately drawn to them. She loved the warmth they gave her whether if he looked at her in joy, humor, or anger. It felt so right to have his attention on her. She needed his attention on her and she didn't understand why.

"Over drinks then, Commander?"

************

It broke Cullen's heart to see her resort to such acts to calm herself, or ignore what happened. It also shocked him to see how much Evelyn was accustomed to drinking the Ferelden Ale. He figured that a high born Free Marcher would settle for wine rather than the bitter substance. But her face betrayed no dislike to the ale, as her cheeks flushed due to her third tankard.

"The Order is full of mad men or at least is lead by one. Bloody bastard.." She mumbled the last bit around the rim of the cup before taking a large gulp of the brown liquid. "Those nobles and clerics looked to happy, hopeful, that their Maker's warriors were finally returning to aid with restoration. Little did they know."

"You seem to be taking this hard, my lady." Cullen stated after he took his own slow drink of the ale. He didn't want to risk getting drunk when he had recruits to train.

"Evelyn and yes, I am. I should." He watched as she absently stared at the liquid she swooshed around in her tankard. "My family is highly devoted to the Chantry and the Order. Generations upon generations the men and unmarried women of my family would give their lives to the Maker, to the Order." A long paused issued as her graceful, black eyebrows drew together. "Just recently my youngest brother joined the Order and it frightens me to think that maybe, just maybe, he got all wrapped up in all this chaos."

By the time she was finished, her hands were visibly shaking and Cullen's heart tightened at the sight. So carefully, as not to tick her off, Cullen placed a comforting hand on her small one that rested on the table. "If all of this didn't happen, would you have joined your brother there?"

Laughing, she gave a resentful smirk, her eyes narrowing. "No. I would be engaged and pregnant without an inch of happiness. Hell, I was engaged before this tragedy happened."

Cullen stilled at her words and he sort of crumbled on the inside. "Oh."

"Don't worry, that plan blew up along with the Conclave." Evelyn said quickly, grasping his retreating hand. With her other hand, she showed him the gold band around her wedding finger. "His way of proposal was tossing me this blasted ring in the carriage on our way to the Conclave." She laughed with a shake of her head which caused distracting lush ink waves of hair to cascade over her shoulder.

Clearing his throat, he built up the courage to ask what he wanted to know most. "What do you plan on doing with the ring? Keep it to mourn his death?" He didn't know whether or not she knew what she was doing, but little by little she entwined her long elegant fingers with his as she looked at the ring.

"Mourn him? No. And I know that sounds heartless of me but the things he said to me, did to me in such a sort time, gives me the right to move on without hesitation." A pause, "as for the ring, I'll toss this thing from the highest point I can find and smile."

"Do you think you'll ever settle down?" Cullen asked, his filter apparently went on vacation. Her oceanic eyes floated up to meet his eyes and held them for several heartbeats.

"I have no idea. Maybe this damned war will end me before something like that happens." Her words crushed him. It was like she was expecting to die, like it could happen at any moment and she wouldn't care. "If that does happen, I want people to remember me for being sharp witted rogue and not a sappy maiden." And apparently to her, being a sappy maiden is getting romantic with someone.

Time to start changing that thought pattern.

"Evelyn, if you meet someone who would push you forward and hold you back, then don't hesitate. You let your heart do the deciding." 


	7. Maker but I Lover Her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which horrible events brings sudden waves of strong feelings and they are both left speechless

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi hi! I'm glad I'm releasing these chapters quick enough! :3 If there is a sudden period of no updates, that's most likely because I ran into writer's block. So in the comment section, drop an idea below just to keep the flow going. Please and thank you! :D

After the events of Val Royeaux, Evelyn was an unstoppable force across Orlais and Ferelden alike. She gained 5 more people for her growing inner circle and even decided on going to Redcliffe to offer an alliance. But things weren't that quite simple. She loudly cursed the mages for allying with Tevinter and then cursed her shitty luck when she had to deal with time magic. That one positive things she got out of the whole ordeal, was a fellow mage, a Tevinter mage whom happens to be a cousin though several times removed, as a quickly growing friend. Evelyn could just picture herself with Dorian as they gossiped about haughty Orlesians, Vivienne in particular.

"Are you sure you made the right decision?!" Cullen protested with much heat to his voice as the commander and her squared off in the war room. Josephine, Leliana, and Cassandra fled the room before the real yelling began.

"Oh, I'm sorry! Had your templar brethren known right from wrong, I would not of had to decide!" Evelyn yelled back, her cheeks heating with her mounting anger. She waved her hands about, "but oh no, they had to abandon the faith and their charges to go play pretend!"

Cullen had the decency to flinch at the truth in her words but he wasn't about to back out from the fight. "And yet you picked the people who could easily become corrupted or blood mages! That doesn't bode well for the Inquisition, neither does it look good." Evelyn's eyebrows rose to her hairline.

"Everyone is exposed to corruption. Need I remind you of the incident that occurred years ago that you were sadly apart of?" Evelyn knew what she said would hurt Cullen and dig up unwanted memories but she needs him to understand, to come to terms with that she has done.

"I-"

Evelyn held one hand up, her marked hand, to cut him off. "Cullen, I know what happened. After you told me, in very little detail, of what happened, I went to Leliana to get answers." She then walked around the wooden table to place a comforting hand on his arm. "I understand your feelings about mages but those were really bad, stupid mages." Cullen didn't say anything, he didn't even look at her as he stared at the ground with a frown. "Can you please just trust me on this one? If I knew allying with the mages would be bad, I would've went straight to the templars but I didn't." She exhaled heavily when he still didn't say anything.

Evelyn let her hand slide down his arm to dropped to her side. She pursed her lips in defeat, knowing she hurt her friend but she wasn't really sorry about it. She has to get him to understand one way or another, she has to.

"Well, since I can't get anything else out of you, I shall take my leave." Stepping back, she leveled him a composed stare and then nodded once. "Commander." However, just when she was about to turn to leave, she left a strong, warm hand latch around the wrist of her marked hand.

"I've read your reports." Cullen started, his accented voice deep with sorrow and confusion. Evelyn turned back to him with drawn eyebrows as he slowly moved his hand to cup hers. "How can you trust those mages when you went through what you just did? What you saw and felt?" His questions just kept pouring out one after another till she realized he wasn't angry at her betraying his feelings of mages and siding with them. Rather, he's angry at her for not taking into account what could possibly happen to her next. His consideration made her heart squeeze with warmth as a gentle smile decorated her wine red tinted lips.

"Oh Cullen..." with her free hand, Evelyn reached up to cup the other side of his face. Slowly and gently, she coaxed him into turning his head to look at her. And once he did, she went breathless at the worry and adoration clouding his amber gaze.

"I have no right to feel this way but Maker, don't stop me." The blond haired commander confessed, much to Evelyn's delight. Somehow the look he gave her, gentle and warm, caused her to move closer to Cullen's toned, muscled, tall body, his scent an intoxicating mixture of leather, oil, and pine needles. 

"Cullen..." Evelyn started, leaning forward just a bit more, her heels slowing lifting from the ground as Evelyn stood on her tip toes. But before any desired actions both parties wanted, the door to the war room slammed open and ceased any further moves.

Cassandra took a moment to clear her throat as Evelyn quickly pulled away with a fuming red face, avoiding an eye contact with the Seeker and the Commander.

"Herald, the mages are ready."

***************

Everyone was celebrating a huge victory that has been done for many years. The Herald successfully sealed the Breach with the aid of the mages and how Cullen stared in awe as she stood up defiantly to the offending green rift and sealed it shut with a simple pull of her hand. Cullen noticed how much stronger she has gotten over the past few months. Her skill with the daggers rivaled that of Hawke's and her mark seemed to need less effort to seal the rifts.

And how he noticed how much beautiful she has gotten as she lead her army and mages. She fully trusted every decision of hers, none of her past hesitation existing now. Cullen remembered the countless nights spent in the tavern as she went on and on about how she's not cut out for this Herald, savior, thing. Evelyn poured her fears and disappointments, hopes and goals to Cullen without a second thought. She relied on him to be her ears when she needed them most, also a comforting presence when as she wanted to do was cry.

He loved the trust she put in him, it warmed him and made him promise himself to always stand by her side whether she grew tired of him or not.

Even now, she sat next to him by the fire where Varric usually occupies. Evelyn had her back leaning against his side while she had her legs stretched across Dorian's legs, a man Cullen grew jealous of. Cullen sensed the growing attractions the two nobles had for each other and the ease they had around each other. Yet, even with the Tevinter nudging his way into Evelyn's heart, Cullen knew she would always go to him for everything.

"Dorian, your constant complaining warms my heart and makes my bits all tingly." Evelyn joked, her laugh soft and airy. It sounded nice and made Cullen smirk.

"Yes well, I hope you can get that handled while I shall deal with my freezing toes." Dorian retorted as he hugged himself and rocked back and forth. Apparently the blazing fire couldn't warm the pampered mage.

"C'mon, it's not that bad down here." Another man part of Evelyn's inner circle, a Qunari that goes by the name The Iron Bull, said from his spot next to a squirrely elf named Sera. The Bull's words was rewards with a sarcastic laugh from the Tevinter but a grin played at the edges of his full lips.

Right now, at this very moment, was peaceful. It was a peace every member of the Inquisition deserved because of their hard work and speedy actions.

Until just an hour later, then all hell broke loose.

People were frantically running for safety to the Chantry with Cullen ushering them in quickly. Just moments ago, he watched Evelyn take Cassandra, Bull, and Dorian and rush to aid the firing of the trebuchets. And now she was sprinting as fast as she could with rescued civilians rushing past her to get to the Chantry.

When Evelyn made it into the building, he slammed the door shut and released his pint up breath as Evelyn spoke frantically with a blond haired boy and Grand Chancellor Roderick. But then Roderick's words filled Evelyn with hope, enough hope that she settled down and started to plan with Cullen. 

He absolutely did not like the plan. It involved her rushing out of the Chantry to distract that large flying beast and its master. Cullen wanted to tell her not to go but he knew she had to risk her life so innocent lives could be saved. And he loved her for it.

So it broke his heart when he didn't see her behind them as they trudged through the snow to Maker knows where. He could only see Haven go up in flames before a large wave of snow covered half of it.


	8. Faith?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn reflects on life choices and choices she hopes to make in the future.

She ached everywhere. She was cold everywhere. The frigid temperature bit at every patch of bare skin and the harsh wind was merciless on her face. Tears sprang to Evelyn's squinting eyes as she trudged through the thick mountain snow. Aside from her growing hatred of Ferelden's weather, Evelyn's marked hand pulsed with new found power that frightened her. First it was the archdemon that greeted her with flames that scared her senseless. Then it was an ancient magister that claimed to have walked the Golden City. Him being one of the men to start the dreaded Blight.

"Fuck.." Evelyn cursed as she stumbled forward with frozen feet, her shoes soaked through. She narrowly escaped her death which Evelyn doesn't know if that was a good or bad thing. Now she has to venture to Maker knows where for some sort of refugee from the chill and find those who fled Haven. To find the man she silently promised herself to see again. She still has a few words to say to that infuriatingly handsome man. She wanted to spill what she has bottled up inside. She wanted to let loose the ill thoughts she had from when she was first pulled into this mess.

But as her numb legs threatened to give out, Evelyn knows her chances of doing that is slim to none. She was battered and bruised. Tired and mentally stressed. Was this the Maker's way of punishing her for being so bluntly stupid. To punish Evelyn for not mourning her fiance's death? Evelyn wasn't as devout as her family but she believes that the Maker has a hand in everything that happens. I mean, everything happens for a reason right?

And if that were to be true, it scared Evelyn. She didn't want the Maker's fury rained upon her, she wanted to do what she wanted without consequences. Apparently that's a dream that'll never come true, sadly.

"Is that..." Her thoughts scattered as her leaking eyes latched on a small patch of burnt wood. Just a few minutes ago she spotted another campfire but it was cold and long dead. Yet as she grew closer with her pace picking up, she noticed that the campfire was giving off minimal warmth, recently snuffed. Evelyn's heart soared with hope, the thought of finally seeing everyone steeled her and made her press onward with determination. Thought of the cold were now firmly placed at the back of her mind.

She prayed to the Maker and Andraste that once she's out of the snow, that her legs aren't damaged beyond repair. She prayed that she could face every individual of Haven and apologize for not being able to protect them. She prayed that hopefully her parents could forgive Evelyn for her stubbornness and childish ways. She prayed for the Maker's forgiveness, berating herself for her past thoughts on the situation.

Evelyn walked and walked. She stumbled from time to time, her body protesting against every movement she made. But she kept pressing forward. Evelyn knew if she were to stop for a slight breather and to rest her teary eyes, her body wouldn't allow her to stand again or wake up.

"There she is!" That familiar deep, Ferelden baritone voice finally broke her struggle in keeping herself standing. Evelyn collapsed heavily into the show, her body shaking with relief, joy, rather than from the cold.

"Cullen.." The single word scratched at her throat as she reached out to the incoming man, her incoming salvation. Evelyn wanted to cry and laugh at the same time when his warm, well toned, strong arms wrapped around her trembling frame. She immediately fell into his comforting embrace and buried her face into his furred pauldron.

"I've got you. You're safe now. I'm here." Cullen spoke soothing words with a hushed voice into her ear before lifting her up into her arms. The last things she remembered before passing out was Evelyn's body soaking up his warmth and his lips moving against her ear with promises of safety and comfort she knew only he can give.

*****************

She was a vision to be awed at. A day ago, Evelyn had Cullen panicking over and her weakened state. The elf who's walking beside her now, Solas, claimed she would pull through just fine but she looked so pale and battered at that time. But once she woke, that same elf took her to a secluded area to discuss something Cullen assumed was very important.

Whatever that elven mage said seemed to bloom confidence in the Herald. As of this moment, she walked with purpose in her shoulders and resolution in the glide of her walk. After all she went through, beaten and left alone in the cold to find everyone, she seemed even stronger. And it made her all the more beautiful.

"Commander." A light, airy tone that reminded him of the Chantry chants yanked him from his thoughts. Evelyn left her spot at the front of the traveling group and now stood side by side with Cullen.

"Evelyn." Cullen said in greeting, bowing his head slightly. The cold made the tip of her nose and cheeks red, replacing her mature exotic looks with one of a child like manner. It made her look years younger and Cullen wanted to know how much further her beauty could stretch till his rendered him paralyzed. 

"I wanted to thank you for leading our people to safety. Sad that we couldn't save everyone though but it gladdens me to see so many still with us." As she spoke, her sapphire eyes scanned the crowd. Whenever she did that, she was always watching for any signs of exhaustion. If she picked up on some, she would stop everyone for a few moments rest yet she wouldn't end the break till everyone was fit enough to continue.

"My lady, don't blame yourself. You've done all you could and that's good enough for all of us." Cullen said. He watched her look over the crowd for a few moments longer before she turned her gaze to his. 

"And we mustn't let their deaths be for vain. We know who created his mess and the one leading his templar army." Evelyn firmly stated.

"Red templars. I don't like the thought of categorizing those things with the more sane counter part." Cullen said. Red templars. Red being from the red lyrium infused into their bodies. It was a horrifying sight. However, Cullen has experience with the vile lyrium from when he was stationed off in Kirkwall but he wasn't an expert on it. He left that up to Varric.

"My apologies, I understand. If it makes you feel better, I'll damn them while I kill them." Evelyn announced with a grin. It made Cullen smile, something he hasn't done for a few days now. Her easy going humor, very much needed actually, helped released the built up tension. "I say, once we get to this Skyhold, drinks are in order. Oh! And let's make a game out of it. I'm sure everyone could use some fun."

Cullen laughed, awed by her cheerfulness and consideration. Her idea seemed very appealing and it was something Cullen would gladly participate in.

"Anything for you, Evelyn." And he meant it. For this beautiful, determined, strong, and smart woman, he would fight Corypheus alone. But right now he would take pleasure in knowing she was alive and by his side, her warmth merging with his. That was enough for now.


	9. His Warmth, Her Sanctuary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn confesses but to whom does she share her feelings with?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey hi hello! I'm watching the hits slowly increase and I'm loving it. No matter the number, I'm glad to see people reading my work and I'm sorry if some doesn't really care much for it D: If you have any suggestions on what I should add, please comment. Any ideas are very much welcomed.

_"Oh do sit up straight, silly girl. You must present yourself as a capable lady we claimed you to be." Her horrid mother ordered stiffly, no warmth to her voice. Evelyn slid her eyes over to the old crow and glared before straightening her back and lifting her shoulders in a show of nobility._

_"Best not to talk, my dear." Her father warned Evelyn. Even though his words held no love or sympathy in them, his spoke volumes of the sadness he couldn't express for his daughter. Evelyn knew he had to do this, not like he wanted to do this and she forgave him easily enough. It was her mother she couldn't forgive as easily._

_So, as insisted by Lord Trevelyan, Evelyn kept her lips firmly shut and her chin held high as their butler escorted and boorish looking man and an exact copy, only much older, into the sitting room they are currently occupying._

_"My Lords." Evelyn's mother and father greeted as they stood up to bow at the two men. Grudgingly, Evelyn stood and gave her own curtsy though she said nothing in greeting. Though she did sneer at them before they looked at her._

_"Ah, and you must be Lady Evelyn. How lovely." The younger Lord Velmont gave her a snake of a small, his eyes shining silent promises of plans he tends to do with her in the near future. It sickened her. She wanted to smack his smug looking face and damn those in the room for putting her through this._

_"I trust all is in order?" Now it was the older Lord Velmont's turn to speak and Evelyn paid no mind to the conversation that issued because of that question. She was too busy having a stare off with her soon-to-be husband and he seemed to be enjoying her discomfort and torture._

_"The young Templar, Arik, is not to join us. Is that clear?" The bugger announced and Evelyn felt her body freeze up with dread. She hoped her brother could help her avoid being alone with the snake but now that blighter himself decides to change things up and it angered and scared Evelyn._

_"Are you sure that is wise?" Lord Trevelyan asked with uncertainty masking his face. His wise blue eyes jumped from Evelyn, to the bastard Velmont and back to her. From what Evelyn can tell, her father didn't like where this was going anymore nor did he seem to like the plan._

_"Of course. I'm sure you'd like to have quality time with our Evelyn." Her blasted mother agreed to the lord and Evelyn nearly cursed out loud. Her father, on the other hand, gaped at his wife but said nothing to object the demand of Velmont._

_And something Old Velmont had him, her father and her mother leaving the room to discuss something in private. This caused Evelyn to be alone with the ugly man, his grin making her stomach churn rather unpleasantly. To make matters worse, he took advantage of being alone together and stepped up to Evelyn._

_She scurried back a few steps to make some room between the two and to get away from the odor the man gave off. But as she took two more steps back, her rear met a table and she knew this was the end of the line._

_"My lord." Evelyn greeted, raising her chin to meet his hungry, predatory stare. He continued to advance forward, much to Evelyn's discomfort until her skirts were flattened against her legs by his. The close proximity had Evelyn's heart pounding with fear of what he might do to her._

_"Aren't you just a vision. This, all for me to do what I want with." Each one of his words nearly made Evelyn sick as she averted her gaze from his. But once she did so, she jumped when her chin was forced up by a strong grip that made her eyes gaze at a deep ebony pair. "I expect not protests from you after we wed. I heard just how rebellious you are." He leaned down, his breath rustling the black strands of hair over her ear. "And I will break that out of you."_

_That night she prayed for her death._

******************  

Skyhold provided to be worth the time it took them to get there. The place was huge and Evelyn called it her new home. Once they finally settled into the abandoned place, one surprise after another and everyone awarded Evelyn with the role of Inquisitor. She took the position with hesitation. She knew what she had to do and she didn't want to let anyone down. She didn't want to let Cullen's faith in her down.

After that grand announcement, Evelyn spent hours wandering the halls of Skyhold. She wanted to seek out every secret the fortress held, the place mystifying her with all the dusty tombs and books it still held. Without a second thought, Evelyn showed Dorian the old library and she took delight in the joy that spread across his tanned face.

"My dear, my love for you has grown tenfold." The Tevinter teased, his gray eyes sparkling with humor and adoration.

"Yes well, as much as I wanted to keep this place for myself, I had to show my favorite mage this." Evelyn grinned. Dorian rose a single eyebrow at her calling him her favorite mage. "My apologies; my best friend." She corrected herself with a laugh when he gave her a pleased smile. It was true though.

"I might kiss you if you keep sweet talking me like that." Dorian joked as he scanned the shelves of books for several minutes before choosing many from the vast collection.

"Oh? And not the Bull?" Evelyn gave a knowing look as Dorian nearly fumbled with the books in his arms, his composure slipping when Evelyn saw through his haughty acts towards the mercenary captain.

His mouth opened and closed several times, lost for words as it would seem. Yet the blush on his cheeks said what he couldn't and Evelyn stepped forward to place a supportive hand on his shoulder.

"Dorian, it's alright. I already know and it's fine." Evelyn knew Dorian wasn't straight from the beginning, when they first met. When Dorian saw the Bull at the Chantry in Redcliffe for the first time, Dorian looked at him with a mixture of terror and hunger.

"Such a thing is okay down in the South?" Dorian asked, his voice a nervous whisper. Evelyn's heart clenched at the thought of his rough time in Tevinter, and it made him all the more endearing to her.

"Yes Dori, it is and I love you all the same." She said with a peck on his heated cheek. "If anything does happen, you have to tell me how it was. I want all the details!" She laughed as Dorian's cheeks reddened even more but she knew he wouldn't hate her for her constant teasing.

"Don't get me started on you and our Commander!" The mage retorted. Evelyn's face went red, not realizing her like for Cullen was so evident.

"I must look like a fool.." She groaned, walking over to a dust covered chair and plopping down onto it, ignoring the mess that might linger on her clothes. Dorian sighed at her soured mood and instantly went over to his best friend's side.

"It was only noticeable to me, dove. Maybe Bull since we did talk about it together but I'm more shocked at how you never personally told me about your growing feelings for him." Dorian sounded hurt and it made Evelyn's heart clench all the more.

To show her regret in not telling him, she held onto his hand that wasn't occupied by books and linked their fingers together. The surprising closeness they had towards one another was very comforting to Evelyn, it pleased her to know she had someone she could rely on..and cry on.

"Dorian, soon you might not be the only man I love and I don't know what to do..."


	10. Blessed Art Thou

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Hawke makes her lovely appearance yet Cullen is greeted with ghosts of his past.

"Inquisitor, allow me to introduce you to Hawke, the Champion of Kirkwall." Varric announced with a slightly smug grin. He was just happy to finally see his best friend again.

Evelyn tore her gaze away from the dwarf and to the direction where soft foot falls sounded on the stone of the battlements. Varric insisted that Evelyn meet him on the battlements to meet someone. And based on the reactions of her advisers, Evelyn could guess just who their mysterious guest is. So here she is, meeting with the woman who dueled and killed the Arishok, covered in cobwebs and dust.

And when Marian Hawke came into view, Varric's stories of her beauty did her no justice. Hawke shared the same color of hair as Evelyn but her eyes were several shades lighter, making them a startling blue. It was a color, a set of eyes, that you could gaze into hours on ends and never feel lost. You'd feel safe.

"Though I don't use that title much anymore." Evelyn, seeing as how Hawke was so fearless in what she does, figured that her voice would be gruff; a contrast to her soft looks. But shockingly, it wasn't. It was just a soft and airy. Warm and kind.

"Seeing as how Hawke and I dealt with Corypheus before, she could help." Varric explained before leaving the two women to discuss things in private. Evelyn watched his departure, thankful for his consideration and the risk he was willing to take with the Seeker in bring Hawke to Skyhold. And Evelyn had no doubt that she would have to deal with the fallout between the two very soon.

Meanwhile, the Champion wandered over to the railing of the battlements, resting her forearms and elbows on it before letting her posture slouch a little, allowing her to appear relax with the how situation.

"I had a view much like this one back in Kirkwall." Hawke said in a casual manner. Though the atmosphere around them wasn't awkward, it was still nice to have a simple, easy conversation start.

"You had just a city looking towards you. I have the whole Thedas. Does it get any easier?" Evelyn sighed as she leaned her hip against the stone wall with her arms crossed over her chest. Evelyn watched the chilly wind card through Hawke's short hair as the Champion laughed.

"I let you know when it does." Evelyn admired Hawke's strength. During the Qunari rebellion in Kirkwall, Hawke could barely save the city and she knew that in order for the madness to end, someone had to die. So she fought one on one with the Qunari Arishok and won, barely. After that mess was dealt with, tension between mages and templars only rose further and Hawke was forced to play a part in it. Either she played as the pawn or puppet-master, it ended with her lover blowing up the Chantry and initiating the mage rebellion.

With everything the woman was put through, Evelyn was shocked Hawke wasn't worn down and wary of everything. If anything else, it only sparked the fire in her even more and it made her all the more beautiful.

"So you fought Corypheus before?" Evelyn finally said after several moments of peaceful silence, the two women seeming to be deep in thought.

"Fought and killed. The Grey Wardens locked that blighted thing away too." Hawke spoke with frustration in her voice. "Speaking of which, I request your help on an important matter. The Grey Wardens of Orlais appear to have disappeared. I'm wondering if they have a part in all this mess."

That grabbed 100% of Evelyn's attention. "And if they are?"

With a deep sigh, Hawke straightened and ran her red, steel clawed hand through her hair. "Then I hope it's nothing we can't fix." Evelyn wondered just how much more Hawke can fix things before the fight dies out of her. Middle aged and has yet to settle down and pop out a rugrat or two. Yet that depends on if she can have children, with all the shit Hawke has been through.

"What of your sister? Is she alright?" Evelyn asked. Hawke regarded her with a raise eyebrow in question then chuckled as she finally shook her head.

"Varric." Hawke tapped her fingers on the stone, her blue eyes gazing out over the courtyard below. "I had Aveline and her husband take her as far away as they can from this mess. Last I heard, Bethany is fine. Maker, I hope it stays that way."

Finally, some of Hawke's sturdy walls crumbled at the mention of her beloved younger sister. The tough front she appeared to put on, dropped and it made Hawke look all the more human, all the more real and it helped steady Evelyn. Even heroes are allowed to hurt and cry and she welcomed back.

"And Anders? I hear he's the most wanted man in Thedas." Evelyn stepped closer to Hawke, just in a way to give comfort and support. Hawke sighed, reaching back to tug the beautiful curved daggers off her back and Evelyn was jealous of them.

"That man, I swear." Hawke laughed, setting her weapons down on a nearby crate. "He's fine but greatly protested on allowing me to come here alone. Of course he knew if he stepped one foot in this place, he was dead but it was one way to show his concern."

"You must love him dearly."

Another sigh but it was fond and not one out of annoyance. "Maker, I do and some calls me crazy for not killing him for what he did at Kirkwall." When she paused, the two women sat down on the cold stone and settled in for the long conversations that was ahead. "But we all knew that the rebellion would happen some way or another. He just decided that it'll be him to deal with the guilt and hatred of others rather than someone else."

"Do you think the people would ever forgive him?" Evelyn knew that answer but she wanted to ask, she wanted to know more about this woman before her and her Anders.

"No, not for killing innocents and starting a war that killed even more but should at least try to understand. People can be so blind and stupid." This time Hawke's sigh was out of annoyance. "Till then, I'll be the only one who understands and I'll stay with him. More for my sake than his."

************************

"The Inquisitor hasn't came down yet?" Cullen asked Dorian as the two stood outside his office door, looking at the section of the battlements Evelyn was currently occupying.

"Indeed. She even missed our gossip session." Dorian informed, pulling his cloak tighter around him to fend off the harsh mountain chill. "We all well know who our lovely Inquisitor is talking to."

Hawke. Cullen frowned. He knew his past wouldn't leave him and he also knew he shouldn't run away from it either. He ought to come to terms with it before it eats away at him. That would be no good for either him nor Evelyn and Maker, he doesn't want to see her upset over him.

Suddenly, a warm hand was placed on Cullen's right shoulder and it was too big for it to be Dorian's. "Bull."

"Commander." The Qunari greeted back before moving to stand beside the Tevinter mage. Cullen watched Dorian regard Bull with a fond nod before stepping close to that gray warm body. Cullen rose an eyebrow at the interaction but said nothing of it, knowing he could get answers from Evelyn since she seems to know everything about her inner circle.

"I suppose I should check up on her. It's almost dusk and nobles still want to greet her." Cullen announced but made no effort to move from his spot. He knew once he got there, he would be faced with the woman who loves the man who created part of this mess. He wasn't ready for that.

"Cullen." Dorian started but waited till the commander looked at the 'vint. "This may help you both settle unresolved tensions. It may be settled for worse or for better but you won't know till you go up there." Cullen hated how much Dorian was right. For someone who complains about every little things and seems uncaring about those around him, he seems to see more than most and understands it. He seems to care a lot more than what he leads on.

"Thank you, Dorian." Cullen said, no louder than a whisper. Leave it to Evelyn's best friend to make up his mind for him. Now Cullen can see why Evelyn is so attached to the mage...other than being related in some way.

"C'mon, big guy." Bull ushered Dorian to the stairs with a gentle hand on the small of his back. Most likely leading him to the dining hall for supper. And soon he was left to stand alone on the battlements but he knew he wouldn't be alone if he just moved to where Evelyn was. That thought seemed to get his legs moving in that direction, the thought of seeing her becoming his purposing.

And as he drew closer, maneuvering around guards, his ears picked up on her accented voice. Warm and soft but this time is had some underlying anger in it. It made him pause just below the stairs that reached where they were most likely sitting. He could see two heads with black hair over the wall but made no move to go towards them.

"They viewed me as a valued resource to spread the Trevelyan influence and blood. Who knows? Maybe if I did wed Velmont and had his child, they'd kill him to ship me off to Maker knows where to have more children there. Maybe Nevarra." Evelyn spoke with not much care in her voice, like she expected that to happened if this mess didn't happen. It angered Cullen.

"Have they wrote to you yet?" Hawke asked before a pop of a cork was sounded, most likely a new bottle of wine being opened. Evelyn responded with a laugh but it wasn't a laugh Cullen grew to love. It was a harsh one.

"No but I wouldn't be surprised to know they packed up and on their bloody way here. Most likely with a new suitor in tow." A pause. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't complain. I still have my parents." Evelyn's sudden nervousness made Hawke laugh, a sound that Cullen was familiar with and it helped him relax.

"Don't apologize. I'm just happy I knew mine for as long as I did. That's something I'm grateful for. And besides, you have every reason to complain seeing as how they treat you." Hawke spoke with undying honesty in her voice. It probably helped Evelyn relax and Cullen was thankful for that. Thankful enough to climb up the rest of the stairs to finally greet the two women.

"Evelyn." Cullen greeted, regarding the Inquisitor with a soft bow of his head before turning his attention to the other rogue sitting beside her. "Hawke."

His sudden appearance had the Champion scrambling up to stand, her eyes wide with disbelief. He assumed Hawke no idea he left Kirkwall to come back to his home country to help with the fight against the Breach, and soon the Inquisition.

"Cullen." She breathed his name quietly, almost like a prayer. He noticed Evelyn stand, her posture full of patience and her blue eyes soft as she looked at them. There's no doubt Hawke told Evelyn about what happened in Kirkwall, and how Cullen played a part in it. How he got the scar on his lip. The scar Hawke gently touch, bringing his attention back to the Champion.

Her time traveling with Anders did nothing to diminish the beauty she held. He remembered the many possible suitors lining up in front of her mansion in Kirkwall, the many men Hawke rejected because she loved a healer, a mage. Anders.

"Hello, Marian." Cullen placed his own gloved hand over hers. He saw tears well up in the corner of her eyes, no doubt regretting all the things that were forced upon because of her and Anders. "It's fine. I'm fine. No reason to be sorry any longer." And that finally made her cry.

Evelyn slid up to their side and laid a comforting hand on Hawke's shoulder, understanding that Hawke was relieved that someone finally forgave her and Anders for their actions. And Cullen was the person Hawke wanted their forgiveness most of all.

"Let's take this to my quarters. It's getting late." Evelyn, ever wise, suggested as she grabbed Hawke's hand then Cullen's hand in her other. She wore a calm smile, one of peace, as she lead the two broken people to the comfort and solitude of her room.

And Cullen felt him fall more in love with her.


	11. Andraste Be My Guide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn gets whisked away to deal with the Grey Wardens and Cullen misses her presence at Skyhold.

Evelyn watched the two people before talk and talk, allowing the hours pass by to the point where the sun was no longer gracing its light in the sky and torches has been lit around the fortress. She didn't want to interrupt Cullen and Hawke, she wanted the two old friends to patch things up and come to an understanding. So she ignored the slight pang of jealousy and had dinner brought up to her quarters.

But she immediately cursed herself for feeling just an ounce of jealousy. Yet Evelyn watches Cullen hang onto every word Hawke says, the two standing close to one another. Right now they could be mistaken to be a couple, had the person not know that Hawke was a taken woman. Evelyn wanted to be the one to stand that close to Cullen's side. She wanted to be the one to make him smirk like what he was doing right now. And then something Hawke said sent him into a fit of laughter. Evelyn's jealousy only grew.

"Well, I believe it's time for me to take my leave." Hawke announced, not even touching her food that Evelyn sorted out for them all. Though, she did gulp down all of the tea in her cup. "I leave the directions to where my friend is staying with your spymaster, Inquisitor."

"Yes, of course." Evelyn nodded as Hawke stepped up to her and gave her a tight hug. Evelyn did her very best to return the embrace but Hawke's arms kept hers at her side.

"Thank you for this, Evelyn." Hawke whispered into her ear, gratitude flooding her voice. Evelyn allowed the Champion to step back and place a kiss on her cheek. "I hope to see you soon, my lady." With a grin, Hawke walked over to Cullen, placing a hand on his shoulder. With that gesture alone, something silent and understanding passed between the two and it left Evelyn curious.

"You take care out there, Hawke. And do try to stay out of trouble." Cullen insisted, turning to watch the rogue back up towards one of the balconies. Hawke laughed, her blue eyes alight with humor and joy.

"Don't I ever." She gave her own red lipped smirk before tipping back on the balcony railing and ultimately falling. Evelyn, wide eyed, rushed through the set of doors towards the railing with Cullen at her side. Evelyn knew it was a long drop and it only blossomed fear inside of her at the thought of Hawke not surviving the fall.

"Hawke!" Evelyn yelled down to the darkness below, ignoring the possibility that her shout might've woken people from their slumber. And just when she was about to turn around to head down there, laughter floated up that gave Evelyn pause. Blinking, Evelyn turned wide eyes to Cullen and he shared the identical look right back. Yet Hawke just kept on laughing despite scaring Evelyn and Cullen.

No more words where shared between the three. There was nothing else to say as the rogue fled into the night, slipping into the shadows to avoid guards. Their silence spoke promises. Promises to see each other again. Promises to solve the Warden problem. Promises to survive through this hellish nightmare.

"Does she always do that?" Evelyn broke the silence but remained standing there, eyes lingering at the last spot she saw Hawke. "Dorian would adore her flare for the dramatic."

Cullen laughed, his head shaking as he made no move to leave his spot. "She has a thing for jumping off of things. I think that's just the rogue in her. I've watched how in battle that she could find a high enough ledge to leap from so she could jump onto someone's back before ending their lives by a slit to the throat."

 "Sounds a bit Ferelden to me." Evelyn teased and took delight in seeing Cullen's laugh strengthen. It did wicked things to her stomach...and heart.

"Once Ferelden, always Ferelden." Cullen agreed after his laughter ceased and his lips smoothed out into a smirk, his scars moving with it and it distracted the poor woman to no end.

With a small small of her own, Evelyn entered her warm room and made her way over to the food to resume eating. She had a feeling that her commander would leave but she wanted the man to stay longer. Evelyn had a feeling that once she leaves for Crestwood tomorrow, she would have little to no breaks until the Warden problem is solved. And that means she would see very little of Cullen and that saddened her.

"I think it's time for me to take my leave, as well." Cullen announced. From the corner of her eye, she watched his form walk over to the stairs but then waited there till she looked at him. "Good night, Inquisitor."

Though her stomach clenched at seeing him leaving, she gave him a tight smile and bowed her head. "Good night, Commander." And with that, Cullen started his voyage down her stairs, his form soon not within sight. And before she knew it, Evelyn found herself on top of those stairs, her hands toying with the hem of her tunic. "Wait."

The sudden demand had Cullen freezing with one hand on the door handle and his warm, amber eyes glued on her blue ones. Something a lot like hope shined in those eyes Evelyn grew to love.

"I just wanted to say that I'm so happy that you-" Clearing her throat, Evelyn felt her cheeks grow hotter and hotter by each passing second. "That so many made it out alive. Thank you for leading them to safety." And with that, she clamped her mouth shout, her eyes anywhere but not on him.

"I won't allow something like that happen again. You have my word." Cullen's words had Evelyn looking at him. There was another meaning to what he said and it made her smile like a silly little girl but she didn't care. Maybe, just maybe, Cullen felt the same way she did and it made her all the more happy and hopeful.

****************

After Evelyn's departure to Crestwood and the events that took place there, she didn't have a moments rest. Cullen watched the Inquisitor leave Skyhold several times over, mainly to switch out tired companions or restock on supplies. Even to send scouts out to areas she had to go but wanted to know more about the terrain before actually going. Events involving the Wardens were quickly unfolding, allowing questions to be answered with disturbing results.

Cullen feared that Evelyn would return to Skyhold one day and just break down because of it all. But with each trip back, she seemed more resolute, more determined and he admired ability to push forward strongly. It was a quality she possessed that made her a fearless, devoted leader.

"Oh stop your fretting and focus on the game." Dorian ordered with a heavy sigh. Cullen felt guilty. He called the mage out here for another round of their daily chess games, only to be dwelling on other things rather than the game itself. Thankfully Dorian had high patience for Cullen's behavior and he understood why. But when Dorian said something about it being his victory, Cullen immediately focused on the game.

"Ah! Inquisitor!" Dorian said cheerfully and that completely ruined Cullen's concentration. His eyes flung to Evelyn's approaching form, her presence a blessing after weeks on not seeing her and when he did, it wasn't for long.

"Inquisitor." Cullen tried to scramble up to his feet and nearly knocked the table over in the process. 

"Does this mean I win?" Dorian grinned like a cat, wanting to take this as a sign of victory. Glaring at the 'vint, Cullen tapped his fingers on the arm of his chair and debated whether or not he should give this win to Dorian.

"I didn't mean to interrupt." Evelyn laughed and Cullen took that as a sign for him to finish this game against the mage. As he focused on his next move, Cullen barely heard Dorian say something about his victory but he mainly heard Evelyn's laugh that accompanied it. Oh how he missed that sound. How he missed her.

Grinning, Cullen moved his piece and called checkmate. "And I believe I just won and I feel fine!" Grumbling, Dorian glared back and forth between the commander and his giggling best friends before moving to stand and take his leave.

"Don't get smug or there would be no living with you." And with that, the mage left and headed towards the waiting Qunari standing at the other side of the garden.

Evelyn continued to laugh and it made Cullen glad to see her relaxed after working so hard. "I just love seeing my two favorite people together." Evelyn said then gasped at what she just admitted. It warmed Cullen to think Evelyn felt that way towards him and possibly more. Maker, he hopes it was possibly more.

"Would you care to join more for a game?" Cullen asked, hoping to bring her back to that relaxed state she just left. He silently watched as Evelyn seemed to have an internal debate if she should stay or not. Cullen knew Evelyn dropped by Skyhold just to discuss plans with her advisers, her inner circle, and Hawke about the siege on Adamant Fortress and who should accompany her. Yet, he just wanted her to take a small breather and enjoy the weather for once since it wasn't as cold as it usually was.

"Set the board, Commander." Evelyn ordered with a small as she took the seat Dorian left vacant. To have her agree to a game, Cullen couldn't hide the smile it brought to his face. And as they played round after round, avoiding topics about the Inquisition, just talking about their families and whatnot, Evelyn said something about wanting to spend more time together with him.

And it caused his heart to soar. 


	12. In Those We Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Adamant happens, demons happen, unforgettable nightmares happen and...confessions!

"Bloody fucking demons." Evelyn spat as she wiped her blade on a piece of cloth she keeps on her body when she knows she has to fight. Even though she slices up those terror demons with such sheer ferocity and certainty, Evelyn was scared. Beyond scared. After each encounter, her hands would curl up into fists to hide the shaking. Evelyn couldn't allow her companions to see her in such a state. She had to be strong for everyone. For Hawke. Stroud. Dorian. Cassandra. For Varric.

After each encounter, Evelyn would sweep the group with her watchful gaze just to check for injuries and their state of mind. They were all scared just like her. Varric couldn't stop checking Bianca's gears and arrows. Cassandra kept her arms folded over her chest, her hands rubbing at her biceps. Stroud was as stiff as a board, barely muttering a word until they came upon the Divine, though it might not be her. Dorian looked the worst out of the bunch. The mage's hair was out of place and his once perfect mustache wasn't curled. Not once has Dorian fixed his state of appearance as the Nightmare demon showed him greatest fears. As for Hawke, she seemed to fare better than the rest. Evelyn had no doubt that the Champion has faced countless of demons in the past and has possibly walked the Fade but not physically though. The only time Evelyn would see an ounce of fear on Hawke's face was when Anders was mentioned.

This was something that could break or change everyone and not in a good way and Evelyn blamed herself. The siege on Adamant was a success. Evelyn clapped hands with her Commander and told him to keep her men safe before rushing off to handle the situations involving with those said men. Evelyn and her small team cleared the battlements, joining up with Hawke in the process before continuing towards the gathering of Wardens.

Evelyn, using the knowledge honed into her by her dreaded mother, convinced the Warden-Commander to cease the ritual but only for the magister prick that caused this shit to happen, summoned a bloody archdemon and ran off with Clarel on his tail. Following that, a battle issued on a sad looking bridge between Clarel and Erimond until Corypheus' pet broke it up by nearly killing the Warden-Commander.

Evelyn moved as quickly as she can to help Clarel but, with some fight still left in her, the commander landed a heavy blow on the dragon and made it fly off once Evelyn and her team secured Erimond.

That's when things quickly fell apart. Everywhere around Evelyn, the bridge was crumbling apart. She watched her companions, frantic, try to run to safety...then they all fell into the abyss below them. Evelyn thought the fall would be certain death but her body went on auto pilot and tore open a rift for them to fall into, for better or for worse.

The latter seems to be more correct.

"Dorian." Evelyn cautiously walked up to her friend, slowly as to not spook him. Her heart ached to see her close friend in such a state and Evelyn knew once they escaped this place, she would spend all the time in the world to piece him back together. Evelyn knew Dorian hasn't fully recovered from his father's sudden visit and how the harsh truth of his father's planned sin came to light. Evelyn wanted to spend that evening with the mage but Dorian sought out the presence of the Bull.

"Evelyn." Dorian muttered her name quietly, softly, almost like a silent prayer. No further words were shared as Evelyn took a hold of his free hand as they continued their way towards the mysterious spirit and the last of her memories. Which, as it turned out, her mark wasn't some fucking blessing from the Maker or Andraste. No. Evelyn happened to be at the right place, at the wrong time and got screwed over because of it. She was a fake and Evelyn knew it would be best for Thedas to know they've been lied to.

**************

The clashing of swords sounded all around him as the fight seemed to drag on and on. It seemed like more and more demons spawn where some has fallen and it was starting to wear Cullen down. Yet, he had to press on and was pleased to see Wardens fighting along side Inquisition soldiers. Whatever Evelyn said worked on evening the odds and Cullen was grateful for that. He wasn't looking forward to cutting down more human than necessary. He would rather slaughter demons all day than strike down a person.

So heavily wrapped up in battle, Cullen blocked at the correct him with his shield, parried with his sword and struck out with his blade into foul smelling flesh. Just moments ago, he saw Evelyn and her group fall with the collapsing bridge. Soldiers shouted out for their falling Herald, her death seeming to be the only result of her descent. Even the Qunari fighting along side him at this current moment, had a face full of horror as the Bull shared the same ill thoughts.

Though Cullen's heart clenched at the sight of her falling, the commander knew Evelyn would have a trick or two up her sleeve. She was good at surprising those around her, one major surprise being able to open her very own rift right then and there. Cullen was shocked to see such a thing. Evelyn never shared that vital information with anyone, not even him but when she opened it right at that moment and fell into it, Cullen had nothing to worry about.

He knew her to be resourceful and quick thinking. Whatever the Inquisitor and her companions seem to have fallen into, Cullen knew Evelyn would find her way out of. And so Cullen wanted to shared that same determination with the mercenary captain. He clapped the Bull on the shoulder and gave him a firm nod once the qunari looked at him. The Bull understood what the single gesture meant and faced battle as a reaver should.

**************

Her head swam with guilt of what she was about to ask of the man beside her. Hawke and Stroud argued back and forth on who should stay behind and provide a distraction to provide the rest with a chance to flee.

"Stroud." Evelyn managed to croak out. She felt her eyes warm up with tears as they welled up but didn't spill.

"It's been an honor fighting along side you, Inquisitor." The fierce warden had zero remorse in his tone or face as he regarded Evelyn with an honorable salute before charging towards the sickening monster. Stroud's easy and quick acceptance made Evelyn hate herself even more for using such a noble man in a way, without hesitation. She knew Stroud viewed this as a chance to redeem the Wardens for their mistakes but it didn't make Evelyn feel better.

Hawke, strong as ever, said nothing more on the subject as she took a hold of Evelyn's hand and ran towards the exit. With Hawke as her lead, Evelyn looked back at the loud gasp and cried out at the sight of Stroud crumpling to his knees in defeat. Had Hawke not been pulling Evelyn, she would have rushed back to avenge the warden's death and probably met her's in the process.

But the scene was quickly replaced with a familiar sight; the sight of her soldiers and wardens battling demons as she finally stepped out of the Fade using the rift behind her. With tears still clouding her vision, Evelyn rose her marked hand and calmly enclosed it into a fist. All around her the demons dissipated into dust, the dust floating back into the green mass behind her until it, too, vanished into nothing.

As a reaction to her sudden appearance, soldiers and wardens alike dropped their weapons to the ground and cheered in victory. Yet Evelyn didn't feel like this was a victory. She could feel avoidable blood on her hands and see soldiers who should be celebrating with them.

"Inquisitor." The call of her title broke Evelyn from her mourning state. Her blue eyes flickered to an approaching warden and her eyes narrowed in response to that. She knew the warrior would've continued forth if it weren't for the glare she was presenting him.

"We have no one to lead us. What shall we do now?" The man stated the obvious and asked as question Evelyn didn't really want to answer. The answer she thought of would be exile them all. Their pathetic faults caused innocents to die and the deaths of her soldiers, of Stroud, was something Evelyn finds hard to come to terms with. Yet, she could hear all of her inner circle share their opinions on what to do with Wardens and so her thought process, grudgingly, changed. 

Evelyn closed her eyes and exhaled slowly to grasp her emotions to rein them in. So once she opened them as she cleared her throat, Evelyn's voice was even and void of emotions. "The Grey Wardens will rebuild under the alliance of the Inquisition. With our support, the warden's may strengthen under a new commander, as allies." Though Evelyn could feel the disapproval of some of her companions and hear the cheers of the wardens, her attention focused on the approaching form of Hawke. The Champion kept forth until she was at Evelyn's side.

"I need to report what happened to the Grey Wardens at Weisshaupt. I may accompany you back to Skyhold so I can restock on supplies but I can't stay more than a day." Hawke spoke softly, following Evelyn through the crowd of soldiers. "I'm afraid that Anders is worrying sick about me."

Evelyn turned around once the two were out of the confines of the fortress and rose her hand. "I understand, Marian. As much as I'd like you to stay, I know you have to get back to Anders and I shall not keep you from that." Evelyn saw gratitude enter Hawke's expressive features, as well as mixture of fear and hesitation. "But promise you'd write to me."

"Of course. I already planned to." Hawke answered with a pained smile, one that Evelyn returned as she cupped Hawke's hands with her own.

"And please tell Anders everything. What you saw, heard, everything you experienced. Surely his love for you can heal such tragedy." Evelyn insisted and rather than using words, Hawke finally allowed herself to cry and Evelyn comforted her by letting her.

***************

After the events at Adamant, Cullen noticed the silent change in Evelyn. Whenever the woman would join him in a leisurely stroll around the courtyard or battlements, she would avoid shadowed corners like a plague or drift off into her own thoughts and then profusely apologize for not hearing what Cullen said.

Whatever Evelyn went through in the Fade, it made her more sensitive and jumpy to things around her. Seeing her in such a state, all Cullen wanted to do was take her to her quarters and hold her tightly.

"Do you have a minute?" Evelyn asked as a way of greeting as she barged into Cullen's office. Raising an eyebrow at her abrupt appearance, Cullen placed the letter he just finished reading onto his desk then laid a hand on the solid comfort of the hilt of his sword.

"For you? Of course I do." Cullen replied, a smile accompanying his words. Just a few days ago Cullen told Evelyn he stopped taking lyrium. She, surprisingly, supported his decision and promised to check on him daily at a set time. But right now wasn't the time she'd usually be in his office so it surprised him.

"We need to talk..." a pause and a nervous shift in her stance. "About us." Evelyn finished with bright red cheeks which in turn, made his cheeks heat up.

"Yes, of course. Mind waiting a moment?" Cullen asked as he started to sort through the mound of reports piled up on his desk. Evelyn simply took her exit through the other door that led to the longer stretch of the battlements. Cullen moved as quickly as he could as anticipation started building up inside of him. It was time. It was time for him to confess his constant growing feelings for her and hopefully she'll do the same. And as soon as he came back to his sense, he and Evelyn was walking side by side in silence until he cleared his throat.

"Nice weather we have." Cullen started awkwardly. His voice seemed to snap Evelyn from her daze as she jumped slightly and wrung out her hands with a few nervous shakes.

"What?"

Sighing, Cullen turned to face her and ended their ceaseless walk. "There was something you wanted to discuss."

He watched her bite the inside of her cheek then her lip then she finally gave up and exhaled sharply, causing her black bangs float up before flopped back down over her forehead. "I've been thinking about you. A lot actually and I know I shouldn't be feeling this way but..."

She rambled on and on and Cullen knew he was standing there with a stupid grin on his face as he stepped closer and closer to her till he had her backed up against the short wall. When Cullen leaned in, he noticed her breathing pick up at their close proximity and the red on her face brighten at notch. He took that as a good sign to advance forward and be the man willing to stay at her side and love her for all her faults and flaws. 


	13. Friends in High Places

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn and Cullen enters their long awaited relationship and gets a surprise visit by a very missed friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is all in Evelyn's POV. Next chapter might all be Cullen's POV but I'm not entirely sure yet.

She could almost feel his lips on hers. Evelyn has always dreamed about doing this. Dreamed about finally kissing her commander.

"Are we even supposed to do this?" Cullen asked, still drawing near and it took all her willpower not to tug on his collar and pull him down to collide his lips with hers.

"And yet I'm still here." And she won't leave until Evelyn gets desired results. When she went into the Fade, Evelyn was afraid she could never be able to confess her feelings to Cullen. She regretted not doing so before the battle at Adamant but she knew it wasn't the proper time for that. Yet once Evelyn tumbled into the damned Fade physically, she was washed with regret.

"That you are." Her commander said ever so quietly as the gape between them lessened with each second, each word. Evelyn could feel his breath on her lips, leaning up on her tip toes to meet him half way. This was it. This is what the two of them have been waiting for. Since the first day they met, Evelyn felt the growing attraction between them and the feeling was unshakable, undeniable. Evelyn wasn't shamed to feel such a way for a man she hasn't known for many years but in her heart, she felt like she knew this man and he knew her. They didn't have to use words to express what they were feeling. Every time Evelyn was sad, Cullen's strong arms would wrap themselves around her waist and hold her, the embrace acting as her anchor.

And just when lips were about to finally meet, someone cleared their throat. Evelyn dropped her head back as Cullen let his fall forward with an annoyed sigh before turning to address the waiting scout. Evelyn avoided looking at the scout, too embarrassed to do so. She didn't even pay attention to the conversation between the scout and the commander. But she did notice Leliana's scout leave and Cullen turn back to her with a huff.

"Look, Cullen-" Before she could finish the thought, Cullen's lips claimed hers and the sudden action made her gasp. At first she tensed, but as quickly as their lips pressed together, Evelyn relaxed and kissed back. Lips moved with lips and a warm tongue touching hers in silent question. Her silent permission was allowing his tongue slip through to greet hers. Each swipe had Evelyn moving closer to Cullen's solid frame, her lithe arms curling around his neck. Her action had her body pressed more intimately to his body and it felt perfect. More than perfect. It felt right. Cullen felt like he was the right man to kiss, like the Maker made him just for her.

And heat traveled to the lower part of her body as Cullen pressed her up against the wall and she felt the glorious hardness of his body. If kissing alone felt this good, Evelyn would bet being in bed and doing more than just kissing would be even better. And she didn't want this moment to end but her body needed air and Cullen pulled away to allow that.

"I'm sorry. Maker but you're perfect." Though Cullen pulled away, he was still holding both sides of her jaw.

"That was what I wanted." Evelyn couldn't recognize her voice, it was too deep and sultry and it told her just how much that kiss affected her. Cullen seemed to love her response and was grateful for it as he stepped closer.

"Good." Was all Cullen said as Evelyn fell more in love with her commander...and his kisses.

*************

"Inquisitor!" Josephine briskly walked her way over to where Evelyn sat on her throne. Throne. Evelyn found the idea of it funny and horrifying. Though, she wouldn't necessarily call it a throne, but rather a Chair of Judgement. Since that's the only reason she really sat on the blighted thing. That and to great pesky nobles that always find their way to Skyhold just to torture Evelyn.

"Josie?" Evelyn rose an eyebrow as she straightened from her slouched position, her hands replacing her elbows on her knees. Just a moment ago Evelyn delivered judgement on Erimond and she sentenced him to death, by her hands, without hesitation. The execution will happen at daybreak tomorrow and it had Evelyn thinking about it. She knew she had to do this but this will caused even more blood to be on her hands. For better or for worse.

"King Alistair is here." Josie announced and not a second after she stated that vital information, royal guards poured into the hall. This had Evelyn standing and walking down the dais to greet the man and question his sudden appearance in Skyhold. Not that she mind, Evelyn could use more friends now that Hawke was no longer here and no letters came from her for several days now. Maybe the King had news about the Champion somehow.

Evelyn stood patiently at Josie's side as the guards parted to allow the King of Ferelden room to make his way over to the Inquisitor.

"Your majesty." Evelyn greeted and was about to lower into a bow until Alistair held his hand up with an annoyed frown.

"Please, enough with the formalities. A person can only handle so much." The King whined, his voice rising like a spoiled child and it had Evelyn laughing as she held her hand out. Alistair shook it firmly with a grin before clearing his throat. "I know my appearance is sudden but I'm not sorry about it."

"Even if you did say sorry, I don't think I have it in my heart to forgive you." Evelyn teased, her own grin matching his. "But why are you here?"

With a sigh, Alistair took Evelyn's marked hand and tucked it into his elbow, a sign to let her know Alistair wanted to talk in privacy. That was something she was gladly to do. So, without further words, Evelyn led the man to the place she grew to adore. The place she shared with Dorian and the two called it their own.

They walked in silence and pleased to see no guards nor noble following the two as they traversed through dark corridors and stairways.

"I understand that you had Leliana look into my wife's location and as a result, received a letter from her." Alistair began, not bothering to enter the room first before beginning the conversation. They stopped in front of the door, Evelyn turning to regard him with a raised eyebrow.

"And you thought she was here or somewhere close?" Evelyn guessed. Alistair missed his wife, she knew that. The Queen's sudden disappearance made the King seem careless about certain things, even seeming to have fallen into depression. It saddened Evelyn.

Alistair sighed, his shoulders drooping down. "Is it too much to hope for? That my beloved may have came here in her quest to seek answers? To find the cure to the Calling, the blight in us Wardens?" His voice broke near the end, a show of how much he missed his queen. Yet, worry touched the edges of his voice.

"You're worried that she got caught up with the Wardens of Orlais?"

"It's the thought of what if she did. Surely it didn't only affect the Orlesian Wardens and if..."

"Calm yourself, Alistair." Evelyn insisted, placing her free hand on his shaking shoulder. She understood his ongoing fear for his wife but she didn't want him to think irrational thoughts. And he seemed to understand what Evelyn silently wanted. Alistair inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly to steady is frantic nerves as Evelyn moved her hand from his shoulder and placed it on the door handle before them. "I understand how you feel. However..." Evelyn begun as she opened the door, turning to look into the dusty library. Yet, words froze on her tongue as her eyes landed on her commander's back. "Cullen?"

Cullen turned at the call of his name. Upon seeing the Inquisitor, his face broke out into a adoring smile, one that Evelyn returned with ease. They've been courting for a week now and each night was spent either in her quarters or his, talking about dark secrets and horrible pasts. Evelyn loved those moments and the easy public affection the two show for each other made people question since they haven't publicly announced their relationship.

"Evelyn." Cullen bowed his head then his eyes flickered to the man standing beside her. At first Cullen appeared to be surprised about the King's presence but then he regarded his old friend with a small smile. "Alistair."

"Thank the Maker you didn't say 'Your majesty'. If one more person addresses me using that horrid title, I will have a childish fit." Alistair promised and Evelyn believed the King.

Suddenly, a soft laugh filled the room and the sound came from behind Cullen. Evelyn, as usual, rose a single eyebrow in question as she crossed her arms over her chest. The voice was unfamiliar but the way Alistair tensed up, she knew it was familiar to him.

"Elissa?" Alistair started forward with small steps. Evelyn frowned at the name, her arms dropping to hang at her sides as she watched the commander step to the side to reveal a figure dressed in a maroon cloak and hood sitting in a chair.

"My darling, if only things were that simple." The mystery woman spoke, her voice not as soft as her laugh. It sounded slightly damaged, most likely from yelling because of battle or screaming because of pain. And then the woman stood with a grace of a noble, her hands moving up to slip her hood down and the woman's face finally came into view.

Elissa Cousland was a sight to behold.

A mass of auburn curls framed a delicate heart shaped face, hair that Elissa no doubt kept in a bun most of the time. Full pink lips curved into a smile and emerald eyes followed Alistair's every movement. She was taller than Evelyn and nearly reached Alistair's height. Elissa didn't have the slender body of a rogue though. She had curves that Evelyn envied and muscles honed from swinging a sword and shield. It was her preferred fighting style, one that she shared with her king.

Alistair made Elissa his sole focus as he remained dumbfounded at seeing her all of the sudden. But he brokered no argument as Alistair pulled Elissa into his arms and embraced her tightly, burying his face into the curve of her neck.

"My apologies, I must smell." Elissa said but didn't break his hold on her. Instead, Evelyn watched as Elissa held her lover with the same affection and it gladdened to see the two reunited, even if it may be for a short while. 

"I wasn't given word of your arrival, my lady. Had I known, this reunion would've happened in a more pleasant scenery." Evelyn explained as she shot Cullen a glare. He only shrugged as Elissa laughed.

"Please don't apologize and I made my arrival unannounced on purpose." Elissa said once her and Alistair finally broke the embrace but remained close together. "Cullen, dear, you should fix your guard rotation. Though I'm not a rogue like our beloved Leliana, I exploited 7 different ways someone could avoid your guards and sneak into this fortress."

Alistair laughed when Cullen's face went bright red as his old crush pointed out flaws he thought were inexcusable. Old crush. Then it dawned on Evelyn that Cullen once loved this woman and now she could see why. Elissa was gorgeous and smart. Her words were carefully picked out and spoken like a true trained noble lady. And sadly, it made Evelyn jealous. Sure, she knew she was pretty to look at but her personality was off putting. This made Evelyn start comparing herself to the Queen and the longer she did that, the more Evelyn wondered why Cullen liked her and not Elissa anymore. 

"Cullen, introduce me to your friend." Elissa insisted with a kind smile. The order had Evelyn snapping out of her thoughts and glaring at the Queen.

"My Queen, I present to you-"

"Why are you here, by the way?" Evelyn interrupted Cullen, her tone harsh. She ignored the concerned look Cullen gave her and stared at the Queen. Elissa looked taken aback by Evelyn's chilled tone.

"Well, if I may, I would like to see your map in the war room and discuss the possible cure for the Calling." Elissa explained, her earlier cheerfulness completely drained from her voice. Evelyn straightened her posture then gave a small bow of her torso.

"Then I'll meet you three in the war room." And with that, Evelyn turned and made her exit from her favorite place in Skyhold.

Maybe it's no longer her favorite place. 


	14. Maker Preserve Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Cullen and Evelyn gets in an argument, Dorian steps in and trouble on the road to Halamshiral!

The tension was so thick, you could take a knife to it. It didn't help that Evelyn was upset over Maker knows what and it's starting to irritate Cullen. Just moments ago she appeared happy to see Cullen and the same thing could be said for him. However, something was said or did in that small library and it made Evelyn all sour.

"After I get supplies from your quartermaster, I'll be on my way." Elissa informed after she finished explaining her findings. Cullen nodded at his long time friend, his eyes still on the map before. The queen has been and gathered information on places scholars has yet to go. It was remarkable, truly. Cullen just wish that Elissa could settle down and stop worrying her husband with her constant traveling. Yet, Cullen guesses he can understand that. Elissa traveled everywhere during the Blight to solve problems and solve the former. Even after the Blight, she had to govern the land given to the Wardens of Ferelden for their service.

"I need to return to Denerim, just to make sure the nobles aren't clawing each others throats out." Alistair said with a sigh.

She was never one to sit still and stay out of things.

"I've sent word to Zevran. Since his problem with the Crows has been sorted out, he'll be more than happy to join up with you." Leliana said. Once the spymaster gotten wind of Elissa's presence here in Skyhold, Leliana left her crow filled tower without hesitation and tracked them down to the war room. Cullen gathered that Leliana was incredibly happy to see their old friend. Though Cullen could only call Elissa just a friend, Leliana could call her best friend with heavy evidence to that proclamation.

"I'm surprised he's not here with you in Skyhold." Elissa laughed softly, resting a hand on her hip as she leaned her weight onto it.

"He wouldn't risk dragging the Crows with him. Had he though, I would've assisted in killing them." Lady Nightingale gave a chilling grin and Cullen was thankful that she was on their side. He'd hate to go against her wrath on the battlefield. If she was just as clever in battle as she was spying and gathering information, that would be a nightmare.

From time to time, Cullen managed to squeeze a story or two from Leliana on nights when they drank at the Herald's Rest. Surprisingly, her storytelling was as good as Varric's and it only helped to remind him that she used to be a bard, and a good one at that.

Cullen learned the death of Elissa's parents from those stories. He also learned about the brutal vengeance Elissa delivered, the imprisonment of Alistair and the queen, the betrayal, the death of King Cailan, the standoff issued by Elissa between Alistair and Loghain. Those stories gave better history lessons than one-sided books for Leliana was present for all of it and none of she shared without Elissa's consent. Until Leliana was deep into her cups and her stoic facade finally dropping.

"I'll have everything prepped up and ready by the time you reach your horses." Evelyn said, though her voice was even it lost some of it's coldness it held just moments ago. Cullen remained quiet, as she has this whole entire time while they were in the war room, as she gave a simple bow of her head then left the four.

At the sound of the door shutting, Cullen left out a heavy sigh and allowed his shoulders sag. He removed his hand from the hilt of his sword so he could place both hands on the table before him and lean his weight forward on them.

"She does know, correct?" Leliana spoke after several seconds of thoughtful silence. Cullen's amber eyes flickered up to the spymaster then he gave a slow nod. It was her turn to sigh, her arms moving to rest loosely over her stomach. "And she knows she's the only one for you, yes?"

"Maker, I hope so." Cullen muttered and in his head, cursed the Orlesian woman for seeing so much.

"She's a Trevelyan, right?" Elissa suddenly asked and continued talking without getting an answer for said question. "My family had dealing with the Free Marcher family. A nasty bunch, they are. I mean, the head family is. Mainly due to that mad mother of Evelyn's." A pause. "But I don't think her family hasn't anything to do with how she's feeling right now. Well..partially. Her family caused her insecurities and it's something she's dwelling on right now."

"Jeez, Leliana." Cullen groaned, his head dropping low in defeat. "You made Elissa into another you."

That got a laugh from the always serious spymaster, a sly smirk decorating her pretty face. "I just taught her a few lessons for her travels. But what she says rings true. Our Inquisitor doesn't realize her worth and it's troubling her." That gave Cullen pause, his eyes narrowing as he pieced everything together in his head. Damn those women for their quick thinking and womanly ways. 

"I have to correct this." And that was final, Cullen thought. He straightened and out of habit, resting his left hand on his sword hilt.

"You care for her a lot, don't you?" Elissa asked softly, her hand reaching out to grab Alistair's, as if too, out of habit. "And she was the one to change your views on mages."

"What makes you say that?"

Elissa breathed out a light laugh. "When Alistair and I first met you, you hated mages with a passion. You were a damaged man and I tried to correct those views. Yet, without a word to us, you were transferred over to Kirkwall's circle. But, like everything else, I soon found out and sought out information about Kirkwall. And that's when I got into contact with Marian Hawke."

Elissa paused to make sure Cullen was still listening and he indeed was, lingering heavily onto each word that flowed from her mouth.

"I warned her about your views on mages and insisted that her sister is to use no magic around you because of that. That's when she promised me to help heal you but of course, you wouldn't have any of that sympathetic mage talk. Yet, you surprised both of us when you went against Meredith and allowed Hawke and her companions leave."

"You seem to know quite a lot, my lady." Cullen said, his voice quiet as he remembered how pitiful he acted ages ago. It wasn't one of his finer moments, that's for sure and since then he tried correcting his ways. Tried.

"And here you are. An ex-templar among a sea of mages our beloved Inquisitor recruited." Leliana continued in Elissa's place, their same thought process only proving how close the two are. "I've watched and saw how you used to look at them with caution and then, in a matter of a few months, you're sharing drinks with them at the tavern."

"You have to tell her that. You have to tell Evelyn she was the one to heal you, not I." Elissa insisted, her green eyes sparkling with adoration for the commander but it was just that. Whenever she looked at Alistair, it was as if she was looking at her entire world. Had Cullen still felt an inkling of love for Elissa, that would've made him jealous but it didn't. It only made him hope that Evelyn would soon start looking at him with that same look Elissa gives Alistair.

***************

"A lovers quarrel, innit?" Sera asked from her place on the stables' roof. Dorian sighed in answer as he watched their Inquisitor and Commander spat back and forth about something or another. Dorian knew Evelyn's been in a bad mood since they sent off the King and Queen of Ferelden a few days back. The ball at Halamshiral is approaching and it has everyone at their wits end.

"Just think of the make up sex." Bull laughed from his place at Dorian's side. Dorian groaned at the spoken idiocy his lover just said as he leaned against the wooden post next to him, still watching the event unfold in front of him. Dorian's eyebrow rose at the quickly reddening face of Cullen and Evelyn's dainty little hands waving around in the air due to her building frustration.

"Cullen does not like how Duke Gaspard offered Evelyn his manor for us to board in till the ball ends. On the other hand, Evelyn thinks this presents a great opportunity to find out what's really going to happen." Dorian explained to the two dimwits keeping him company by the barn Blackwall likes to inhabit.

"We've got a master of the Game in the making!" The Bull cheered proudly, his lips turning into a smug grin. Dorian rolled his eyes at the Qunari and wondered to himself why he beds such a man.

"It's nothing to be proud of, really." Dorian mumbled. He knows all to well how the Game can turn a sweet person into one with malice. It's quite sad. Dorian should know, he's had practice in such a thing and it was nothing to be in awe over.

"On the contrary, my dear." Dorian's stomach flipped at the snarky voice he didn't really want to hear right now...or ever. Yet, his mask sliding perfectly into place, Dorian straightened his posture and smiled at Vivienne's approaching form. "If she prefects at the Game, it'll just show those nobles not to mess with our Inquisitor, yes?"

"I say a bunch of pies could do the trick." Sera suggested and the Bull gave the skinny, squirrely elf a thumbs up. Vivienne ignored Sera's comment, moving towards her white stallion to prep her for their voyage to Halamshiral. Dorian turned back in time to see Evelyn storm off, her nimble legs making short work across the courtyard and Cullen stalking towards the stables but his gait lacked anger. Instead, heavy regret and sadness had the commander dragging his feet.

"Oh dear..." Dorian said, quietly for only Bull to hear with his trained Ben-Hassrath hearing.

"Here comes Mr. Sour Bottoms." Sera announced, adding a new nickname to her growing collection of them for everyone in Skyhold. Dorian, like always, ignored the elf and looked up at Bull. It didn't bother him none to find the Qunari already looking at him, rather it was endearing. Bull was always watchful and always seemed to know Dorian's plans before he spoke them.

"Yeah, I'll get your horse ready. You go and talk to him." The Tal-Vashoth spoke softly, the Qunari's hand a comforting weight on the small of Dorian's back. Dorian gave his lover's hand a squeeze before moving toward the commander and tugging him along into the barn. Thankfully Blackwall was off on his usual walk with the lady Ambassador. 

"Dorian, I am in no mood for conversation." Cullen sighed but he made no move to leave the barn because he knew Dorian would only pursue after him. 

Dorian tsked at the man and his sad state. Cullen's blond curly hair started to stick out in places, making him appear younger yet exhausted. "I suggest you let Evelyn do things her way and trust her." Dorian said, crossing his arms over his chest. He would rather spend this time getting his things ready so he could resume his research than spend his time playing parent. Yes, he loved Evelyn and Cullen dearly but this was getting out of hand.

"It's not that I don't trust her, which I do explicitly. It's just Gaspard I fail to trust." Cullen confess, his honey colored eyes avoiding Dorian's gray ones. Cullen appeared to innocently troubled, it caused Dorian to smile fondly at him.

"I sincerely hope you know that Evelyn would never let that man do a thing to her." Dorian paused, his hand moving up to cup his chin as he thought for a moment. "However, she just might. For the Game's sake, of course."

Cullen groaned, his leather gloved hands coming up to cover his face. "You're not helping things, Dorian." 

"Oh hush, Commander. All I am saying, our Evelyn will do what is right in the eyes of the Game." Dorian's words only made Cullen's shoulders slump even more. With a tired sigh, Dorian took a hold of Cullen's hands and pried them away from his face. "Go to her, Cullen. You need to show her you trust her and the rest will fix itself."

******************

"Bandits!" Cullen heard Evelyn cry out from her position at the front of the traveling party. "Bull, keep those blighted men from the wagons!" One order followed after another as she tactfully placed her inner circle into offensive and defensive positions. The Inquisitor didn't issue an order to Cullen but he knew in his gut that she wanted him fight along side her as she charged towards the group of men with dual bladed daggers out.

Before hitting the road, Cullen followed Dorian's advice and had a long and calm with Evelyn. After more confessions and worries were split, they ended up in a tangle of limbs and gasping for air. Now Cullen knew to always follow Evelyn's best friend's advice.

And now was their third day on the road and they were facing their second problem. On the first day, they had to deal with a traveling group of demons and that made Evelyn seek out the rift they spawned from. Yet each night, tired and sore from battle and horseback riding, the two would curl up together in their tent and fall into blissful sleep. It was grand.

"Inquisitor!" Cullen called out as he saw a broadsword wielding bandit rush towards Evelyn's back. With ease and grace, she finished off the man in front of her with a swipe to the neck before spinning back on her heel to lash her other leg out to kick the bandit. She clipped him across the jaw, which caused him to tumble to the side but didn't fall. Yet it was just enough to have Varric's bolt impale itself through the man's throat.

Their teamwork came effortlessly to them. Cullen knew Evelyn took the time to travel with each companion, mixing the combination to insure that everyone can work together without complications. To hear about it was one thing but to see it in actions, it was something all right. And to have them all together like this, fighting, assisting, defending, dodging an incoming spell with ease, incredible couldn't even describe it.

"Don't let my good looks distract you, Commander." Evelyn's laugh from his side shook Cullen from the awe inspiring sight. He bellowed out a laugh of his own as he pulled his sword easily from gaping gash on a bandit's chest. He entered this battle with just his sword. Cullen saw no point to don himself with his shield. These bandits thought they could fight with any weapon handed to them but their techniques were a mess. Shame.

"Yet you aren't the one with a heart fluttering smirk." Cullen teased back with ease, grateful that the two of them were no longer fighting. He left like he could breath easier, like a weight has been lifted from his chest.

"You know, I do sort of share the same scar as you now." And she did. It was a little gift from the Nightmare demon from when she was in the Fade. It healed nicely though but the scar went from her top lip to her bottom. One would think any scars on her would diminish her looks but actually, it added to them. It gave her so much more character, even though Evelyn's personality did enough of that.

Cullen's fist flung out, the impact landing on a bandit's Adams apple. It was strong enough to have the man dropping and gurgling for air, his windpipe no longer doing its job. He was the last bandit too and that's how he'll die. Suffocation.

"Maker, but I love it." Cullen, with his sword still in hand, reached out and pulled Evelyn to his body and kissed the woman with everything he had. They were both covered in their victims blood but neither cared. Nor did they care for Bull's loud cheers and Sera's gagging, both sounds nearly drowned out by clapping and laughing. 


	15. Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn starts to dread all the surprise visits but this surprise visit has the Herald standing on her toes and her companions doing her sly business for the Game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi hi! My lord, 15 chapters in and I'm hoping I am doing a good job! Recently I've been thinking about writing a ME fic and of course, I'll stay writing this one. Do y'all think I should make a ME fic?

_Stupid nobles. Stupid Gaspard._ Insult after insult ran through Evelyn's head as she plopped down onto her bed as the second day started to come to an end at Gaspard's manor. Two days in and Evelyn already wants to leave this horrid place. If that lecher tries to grope her body one more time, she'll sic Cullen on the Duke.

"Just tell me when, Boss." The Iron Bull stated as he stood at Evelyn's bedroom door, acting as her guard as per request from the Inquisitor. When they arrived here, Gaspard was quick to try to tear Evelyn away from her inner circle. Yet, Evelyn expected it to happen and pretended to be an innocent maiden that needed her hired bodyguard with her wherever she goes. Gaspard was none too pleased with how the plan was turned against him but voiced no protest and grudgingly had the Bull tag along for each walk Gaspard took Evelyn on.

"Oh how I wish I can." Evelyn laughed harshly, dropping back to lay on the overly too soft of a bed. 

"I don't like how your room is so far from the others." Bull grumbled while he moved from his spot at the door to stand by her bed. Evelyn rolled over to make room for the large Qunari, wanting the male to lie down with her as they discuss thing.

"Gaspard is as sly as he is smart. Which, in truth, isn't saying much. Not even the most talented spy could catch on to his plans." Evelyn lifted a leg then folded it at the knee to bring the limb closer to the body. She did this so she could start unlacing her boots. "Cullen looked ready to flay the Duke with his sword because of it. For as much praise Cullen gives the man for his battle strategy, he surely hates Gaspard."

"With good reason too. Speaking of which, Dorian'll be bunking with the commander. His idea." Bull informed, idly playing with his eye patch.

"Does this mean I can have a sexy Qunari in the same bed as me?" Evelyn teased with a wiggle of her eyebrows. It was a joke obviously but since day one the two of them have been throwing dirty jokes at one another. Evelyn knew how committed the Bull was with Dorian as she was with Cullen but that doesn't mean she can't toss in a flirty line here and there for shits and giggles.

"And make more rumors for the sharks? Shit, I'm down for that." Bull's harsh, scarred face softened with the smile he gave her. "I suggest having Sera sleep in here too. That'll make shit fun." Evelyn laughed again as his ideas started to become better and better. In truth, she missed her inner circle. Before coming here, Evelyn could talk and act freely around them and only Vivienne would judge her for her unladylike behavior. The only time she could see her friends was at breakfast, dress fittings, lunch, and supper. Gaspard is going out of his way to keep Evelyn from her companions and she hates it.

At least she has Bull at her side. Through him, she could rely messages to her people and get any updates. 

"I'm sorry for keeping you from Dorian." Evelyn said with a sigh, dropping her last boot onto the floor.

"Nah, it's all go-" A knock interrupted Bull and had the Qunari bolting up and rushing to the door before Evelyn could blink. She, on the other hand, sat up and shrugged off her leather jacket and gloves, peeling off any metal plating she had to protect her. Standing, Evelyn could hear the hushed exchange of words between Bull and her commander. Cullen most likely came to check on her, making sure Gaspard hasn't forced his way into her room.

"Bull, let him in." Evelyn ordered as she raked her fingers through her ebony hair, pulling it back so she could tie it up into a simple ponytail. She then looked up at the sound of heavily approaching footsteps and smiled at the man before her. "Cullen, I hope you are aware that we can't meet up like this. As much as I want to see you alone, I can't."

Cullen remained silent as he took one gloved hand and cupped her cheek, his brows drawing together into a look of concern. He discarded his armor before visiting, leaving him in only his white v-neck tunic, his cotton black pants, boots and his usual, always present gloves. Though he didn't wear his armor, he still looked every bit as strong and intimidating. Evelyn loved it.

"Oh stop worrying, Commander. I'm perfectly fine and besides," giving a lopsided grin, Evelyn stepped away from Cullen and turned her body slightly before pulling off her tunic. "I have Bull with me." She ignored Cullen's heated gaze as she started to undress, taking one piece of clothing off after another. Oh, she was aware of Bull being there in the room but they've bathed together so many times in lakes and ravines while out on the road, Evelyn felt no awkwardness being naked around Bull. He neither stared nor commented at or about her body and some of the scars that decorated it. At times like those, they were just two pals trying to get clean.

"I like the idea of having his chevaliers but what he's doing..." Cullen drifted off, not wanting to finish the sentence he began after a long moment of just watching Evelyn prep herself for bed.

"And I don't like the idea of seeing him on the throne." Evelyn shared, taking a warm wet cloth and running it along her face, taking off any makeup that lingered even after her bath.

"I say...don't decide anything until we know what the ball has in store for us. Just gotta wait two more days." Bull butted in, his sensible logic something Cullen and Evelyn agreed with.

Placing the cloth onto the edge of the basin, Evelyn strolled over to Cullen and took his hands into hers. "Stop fretting, love. Everything will be fine, you'll see." She gave him her best determined smile and Evelyn felt him relax because of it. Leaning forward, Evelyn placed a soft kiss on Cullen's whiskered cheek. "Now go before someone catches you."

****************

"What happened to my original dress?" Evelyn asked for the fifth time as she paced up and down the length of her dressing room. Servants just forced her into a white dress that wasn't her green one that she helped Vivienne and Leliana make. She loved that dress and for some reason or another, that dress disappeared and was replaced with this lung squeezing horror.

Sure, it was pretty. Evelyn would think that if she could ignore how the white, silver trimmed bodice made breathing difficult. From below the bodice, waves upon waves of snow white silk flowed like water around her legs. As for her arms, they were covered in itchy white lace and it only reminded Evelyn as to why she hates wearing dresses so much.

"That dress doesn't sit right with me." Dorian confessed from the vanity across the room. While Vivienne turned Evelyn's hair into a curly masterpiece, Dorian applied just enough makeup to have her facial features popping. Dorian liked her natural beauty and would hate to cover it up in Orlesian style makeup. But he did coat her lips in some red crap she'll probably never wear again.

"It's looks like a wedding dress, my dear." Vivienne added from her place beside Dorian, her expression just as grim as his. Evelyn froze at the words, her shoulders moving forward as tension built up inside her body. Even her hands shook as Evelyn stared wide eyed at them, her mind fumbling over words to say but couldn't voice.

"Or he switched her original dress for this white one so he'll know if she partook in tonight's plans." Dorian guessed, his voice going back to it's usually calm and it helped relax Evelyn just a tad bit.

Turning, she faced her two companions with narrowed eyes and scowl. "And I'm trusting you two to lead the rest of the inner circle. You both know how the Game works." Her voice had none of her fear in it. Instead, it was strong and commanding. Vivienne gave a pleased smile, clearing enjoying her major part in tonight's plans and Dorian looked just as equally satisfied.

Gotta make it up to Vivienne somehow anyway. The circle mage was forced to wear the Inquisition uniform and she was none too please about it.

"Great things are coming, my dear, I can promise you that."

**************

Evelyn thought if the Empress wasn't stupid, she must be pretty blind not to see the incoming doom for her. The Orlesian blonde greeted her treacherous cousin with a pleasant smile and a few kind words.

Fuck it. She's blind and stupid.

After finishing up talking to the Empress, Evelyn took her unhappy self to where Leliana stood. The spymaster requested to speak to her and spoke they shall. The only thing that stuck in her head from that whole conversation was something about a cult adviser, a mage to be precise.

Slightly lifting her skirts to avoid stepping on them, Evelyn re-entered the ballroom and started to tracked down Dorian and Vivienne. Along the way, she shared words with Josie and her slightly annoying sister with her slightly annoying accent and then had a jealous chat with Cullen. She fumed over the fact that so many girls and yes, men, fawned over her commander and he was too polite to shoo them away. And when Evelyn asked the man to save her a dance, he declined it. Men.

"Eve, drink this." Dorian appeared at her side suddenly, holding a glass of bubbling liquid and it was something she took without hesitation and downed the contents in a single gulp.

"Have anything for us to do, my dear?" Vivienne was next to appear suddenly and Evelyn was starting to wonder if that was a mage thing.

"Yes. Vivienne, have Sera go around and talk to the servants. I want any information that may be valuable. Dorian, you, Cole, and Solas find out what exactly is above the courtyard." Evelyn listed, watching the two mages nod without objection. "I want Bull hanging out where the Council is; I have a gut feeling that somehow they might be involved in this." She paused, her eyebrows furrowing as she tried to figure out what the rest of her companions should do. "Cassandra and Varric should dance with any and every noble they can, have their ears out for any interesting gossip."

Just when Evelyn opened her mouth to issue one more order, a voice she never wanted to hear again had the words dying on her tongue.

"Evelyn?" Madam Trevelyan's voice had Evelyn's stomach dropping and a cold sweat breaking out on the small of her back. Against better senses, Evelyn slowly turned to look at a woman whose arm was entwined with Evelyn's fathers.

_Why are they here? Who invited them? Why does she want to talk to me? Is something bad going to happen?_

"Why are you two here?" Evelyn question, her voice having a cold bite to it. Her mother didn't seem affect by Evelyn's coldness but her father frowned, concern wrinkling his aged face. He was still a handsome man but stress has done a number on him. Thinning him. Graying him.

"Grand Duchess Florianne de Chalons invited us. She caught wind of our estrangement and hoped that this ball would patch things up between us." Her father answered but seeing Evelyn's face go from anger to worry, his frown deepened as he tried to piece things together.

At the mention of the Duchess, Evelyn's blue eyes snapped up to quickly scan the room for Florianne or her brother. Yet, the only one she could find was Gaspard and Florianne's absence only worried Evelyn even more.

"Go." Evelyn commanded, the word was meant for Dorian and Vivienne as they watched on with understanding yet sad gazes. Her sudden firm order had Evelyn's mother slightly jumping and her father raising an eyebrow in question. The two elderly adults then watched the two mages blend back into the crowd of laughing nobles, doing Evelyn's bidding.

Wringing her hands out in front of her from rattled nerves, Evelyn glided over to the railing that over looked the dance floor below. Her eyes followed the graceful movements of the dancers, her cautious gaze picking out anyone that looked suspicious or one that might prove an ally. As she did so, Evelyn could feel her parents draw closer, either out of concern or for their own protection.

"Amazing how they have the balls to actually do this." Evelyn let out a frantic laugh, her hands curling around the railing to grip it tightly in frustration. "To make my parents pawns to keep me from my own Game. To indirect threaten me and them. Fine." Looking back at the troubling faces of her parents, Evelyn's lips curled into a sinister grin. "Let the Game begin."  


	16. War of Minds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Cullen witnesses just how cunning his Inquisitor is, Evelyn's inconsiderate mom, and Morrigan.

Cullen didn't know when Evelyn would make her first move but when he saw members of the inner circle start disappearing one by one, he knew it was time. Cullen turned to the two noble men standing to his left, the two casual chatting away until it abruptly stopped to look at the commander. With a firm nod, the men split from the group of chatty females to go inform Cullen's soldiers to move into position.

Cullen then looked back at the women before him till he caught the eye of a blonde haired woman. She gave a kind smile and politely bowed, just for appearances sake, then moved away from the group and trekked over to the waiting spymaster. Words were exchanged and soon the blonde left the ballroom and Leliana gave Cullen a knowing nod of her head, her red hair swaying with the movement.

Clearing his throat, Cullen apologized and politely extracted himself from the pawing group of noble women then made his way over to the agitated looking Herald of Andraste. As he grew closer, Cullen noticed an older looking couple standing with Evelyn. The woman shared almost the same facial features as Evelyn but wrinkles took an ounce of her beauty away. The woman held onto the arm of a man who was much taller and possessed the identical sapphire eyes Evelyn had.

Mother and Father.

Now Cullen understood why Evelyn looked so ticked off but their presence only brought confusion to him.

"It's your fault that this is happening. You just had to go off and play hero, didn't you?" The woman huffed, not even bothering to hide her mounting irritation. Beside her, the man only sighed while their daughter looked about ready to knock her mother out.

"Petra, please calm down, my dear." The man insisted with a tired tone. Evelyn opened her mouth to say something until her eyes caught the approaching form of Cullen. He was pleased to see how his presence made her instantly relax, the stiffness in her shoulders evaporating to make them slightly droop into their natural place.

"Commander, it's so nice to see you." Evelyn greeted, instinctively reaching out towards him but then quickly pulled away for appearances sake. Still, Cullen smiled back and gently placed her hand on the crook of his elbow before bowing his upper body to the two people he'd rather not be bowing to.

Evelyn took a moment to clear her throat, her gloved hand on his arm tightening its hold. "Cullen, may I present to you Lord Davik Trevelyan and Lady Petra Trevelyan." Though she smiled, it didn't exactly reach her eyes.

"You're the young man leading her army, correct?" Lord Davik asked, not bothering to comment on the order in which his daughter introduced them. And to answer his question, Cullen nodded then held his hand out.

"Yes, sir, and what an honor it is to do so." Cullen said, shaking the lord's hand.

"No need to flatter Evelyn. The compliment would only get to her small head." Lady Petra interrupted Cullen's and Lord Davik's civil greeting with her venomous words. Instead of bad mouthing back to her, Evelyn breathed out a small light laugh before shaking her head.

"Commander, a word please?" Even without answering, she was pulling Cullen over to a nearby window that wasn't crowded with nobles.  Sadly however, they were still within her parent's sight when all Cullen wanted to do was pull Evelyn into a fierce comforting hug and tell her it's all right.

But she did keep her back to them so she lifted her free hand to lay it on his bicep. "Grand Duchess Florianne invited them." Evelyn began without preamble. This surprised Cullen which had him looking at her with wide eyes. "Her and Gaspard is trying to keep me out of their machinations tonight. That's why Gaspard switched out my dresses and why Florianne invited those two. The Duchess is indirectly threatening me. If I were to leave, they would be in danger and I can't allow that to happen no matter how much I dislike my mother."

"So what are you planning on doing to play a part in this?" Cullen asked, impressed with how Evelyn concluded all of this and it all made sense.

Evelyn gave a heavily sigh, her shoulders rising and falling with it. "The inner circle will be playing the biggest part. I will receive information from them and I'll direct them on where to go. And until the opportunity arises for me to leave and join them, I have to stay here and monitor the two siblings."

"I think it may also be wise to speak with the Empress and the elven ambassador. The latter may know at least something or two. Could be worth a shot." Cullen suggested and he watched his lover's eyebrows furrow as she considered what he said.

"I'll do that," she finally said after a moment then Evelyn turned her gaze up to him. Cullen believed, as years passed by and they all grew old, he would forever love her eyes. "I have a feeling someone will die tonight but I don't know who and it won't be the Empress."

*************

Evelyn also concluded that Orlesians makes it a habit to piss her off. The Empress was 'too busy' to talk to her but Evelyn could clearly see that blonde idiot standing alone on her balcony. However, she had to settle talking to the three annoying handmaidens and they were too, in fact, useless. Yet, Evelyn did squeeze some information out of Ambassador Briala and had an inkling of suspicion that the elf had a fling with the Empress. So Evelyn filed the information away for later, deeming it important for when the opportunity arises.

Since her conversation with Cullen, Evelyn grouped up with her companions outside of the ballroom, having Cullen watch over her parents until she returned. Evelyn learned of possible Venatori agents being in the palace, elven servants disappearing, Gaspard threatening a Council member and a bunch of other small things. Things were proceeding quicker than Evelyn thought and she informed her inner circle to stand ready just in case.

Strolling passed the guarded trophy room, Evelyn was in deep thought as she made her way back to the ballroom but just when she grew closer, a voice addressing her put a stop to her steady strides.

"Well, well, what have we here?" It was a woman's voice, Ferelden of some sort and it have Evelyn turning to watch a dark haired woman slowly make her way down a flight of stairs. She was a dark, mysterious figure. Pretty, easy on the eyes with dark hair pinned up and yellow eyes a stark contrast to her dark burgundy eye shadow. "The leader of the new Inquisition, fabled Herald of the Faith, delivered from the grasps of the Fade by the hand of Blessed Andraste herself." The woman finished, her full figure coming into view and Evelyn became envious of the dress she wore.

And Evelyn was impressed with the mystery woman so she allowed the woman to continue talking. 

"What could bring such an exalted creature here to the Imperial Court, I wonder? Do even you know?" 

Evelyn grinned, slightly leaning back as she crossed her arms over her chest. "We may never know. Courtly intrigues and all that."

Thankfully, the woman didn't push for an answer, seeming to understand that Evelyn was just watching what she was saying. Being cautious and all. "Such intrigues obscure much, but not all." Pausing, Evelyn watched as the woman slightly bowed with a corner of her lip quirked into a half smile. "I am Morrigan. Some call me Advisor to Empress Celene on maters of the arcane."

Morrigan. Someone Leliana and Elissa knew and traveled with. Evelyn hoped that she could trust Morrigan and she wasn't someone Leliana warned her about. 

But, Morrigan signaled Evelyn to walk with her and so they started their journey through the nobles chatting about. "You...have been very busy this evening. Hunting in every dark corner of the palace." Morrigan started talking again and soon stopped to face Evelyn with her unnerving eyes. Evelyn wanted to correct Morrigan that it wasn't Evelyn doing the hunting, she was just instructing what her companions to do. Yet, Evelyn just let it go and said nothing.

"Perhaps you and I hunt the same prey?"

Keeping her face normal, Evelyn shrugged her shoulders in a nonchalant manner, unsettling the dark curls nesting on them. "I don't know. Do we?"

Morrigan's serious manner surprisingly dissolves as she chuckles softly, making her appear more normal and slightly more friendly.

"You are being coy."

"I'm being careful." Evelyn stated firmly, her arms dropping to her side as she straightened her posture.

"Not unwise, here of all places. Allow me to speak first, then." And the walking resumed. They remained quiet at first, allowing the two get comfortable in each other's presence. While Evelyn felt nothing odd about Morrigan, she saw those around the two regard Morrigan with judging eyes and distrustful frowns.

"Recently I found, and killed, an unwelcome guest within these very halls. An agent of Tevinter." Once more they stopped walking as soon as Morrigan finished announcing a piece of vital information that had Evelyn frowning. Venatori. There was no doubt about it. Now all Evelyn has to do is find out why they are here and who hired them.

Evelyn was pulled from her thoughts when Morrigan held out a key in front of her. "So I offer you this, Inquisitor: a key found on the Tevinter's body. Where it leads, I cannot say. Yet if Celene is in danger, I cannot leave her side long enough to search. You can." Evelyn took the key as Morrigan continued talking and examined it closely. It looked nothing special, just a brass key with no hint to which door it goes to but Evelyn has an idea.

"Briala's people are whispering about disappearances in the Servants' Quarters. This key may lead there." Evelyn pocketed the key in the sash around her waist as she explained to Morrigan what she learned. She shared it without hesitation too. Something Leliana would probably scold her about it she were to find out.

"The Ambassador does have eyes and ears everywhere, does she not?" Morrigan grinned, silently hinting something Evelyn quickly caught onto as the two women wandered over to the ballroom door and stopped just before entering. "Proceed with caution, Inquisitor. Enemies abound, and not all of them aligned with Tevinter." Evelyn nodded as the mage turned to leave, a smile on her face.

"What comes next will be most exciting."

***********

Evelyn made sure to let Leliana know where she was going, informing her about Evelyn's encounter with Morrigan before setting off to find her companions. Weaving through the crowd of gossiping nobles, Evelyn spotted her waiting group of friends near a table of food as they chatted about this and that.

"Evelyn." Dorian was the first to noticed her approaching. At the call of her name, the rest of the inner circle ceased talking to watching their Inquisitor casual walk up to them. Evelyn kept her pace calm and steady so she wouldn't draw curious stares.

"Take this key and search the Servants' Quarters. Something there might explain the disappearances, lead to more answers and vital discoveries. But beware: a source just confirmed Venatori agents." Evelyn spoke quietly, taking the key from her sash and shoving it into Dorian's waiting hand. The mage absorbed each word and cursed when she announced their persistent enemy being here.

"Are you sure you don't want to come along?" Dorian asked, his handsome tanned face full of concern. Evelyn knew her best friend witnessed her ugly interaction with her parents and he seemed to know how disappointed she was that Evelyn couldn't help them at all. She had to participate from the sidelines by issuing one order after another, always an apology following each one.

"As much as I'd like to, I can't. That's why I trust that you all can handle it, just like everything else." Evelyn said, determination that her friends won't and will not disappoint her seeping into her words.

"Don't worry, my dear. Your turn is soon approaching, it would seem." Vivienne patted Evelyn gently on the cheek before gliding passed her.

"Ma nuvenin, ma vhenan. We'll return as quickly as possible." Solas promised, placing a sweet kiss on her forehead before following after the departing circle mage. Evelyn watched as Cole disappeared, Sera talking about shooting someone in the dinglebag for Evelyn before leaving also, Cassandra placed a hand on Evelyn's shoulder and gave the Inquisitor an understanding nod, Varric grinned up at Evelyn and winked before leaving along side the Seeker, Blackwall said nothing and touched her arm softly but the silence and gesture spoke volumes.

Dorian and the Bull were the last one left.

"Dorian, I'll be fine. I actually dare them to try something in front of everything. Just know, I'll put on a pretty damn good fight." Evelyn teased as an attempt to lighten the mood. However, it didn't succeed in brightening her mage friend and it made her feel even worse.

"I just hate leaving you here. Vulnerable. Alone. Unaware of what might happen to us or to yourself." Dorian confessed, his gray eyes avoiding Evelyn. Bull sensed Dorian's discomfort and moved in closer. He didn't touch but the close proximity was a show of comfort and support.

Cherry lips curved into a kind smile as adoration for her friend filled Evelyn, she took a hold of Dorian's hands and gave them a squeeze. "Go, Dorian. Kick their arses and give me a reason to kick Florianne's. Okay?" What Evelyn said pulled a small laugh from Dorian as he returned the squeeze, his eyes finally landing on hers. "Remember to add a bit of extra flare for me."

"Just for you, my love." He full on laughed this time and went quiet to place his lips on her brow and lingered there. He didn't want to leave, Evelyn knew that but he knew he had to, for her sake and everyone else's. He had the utmost dedication to her, almost placing her well being above his and that's why Evelyn loved Dorian so much. He was her partner in crime, her best friend, her go-to.

Finally, with one final squeeze to her hands, Dorian let go and left without a final word. Bull, on the other hand, just shook his head at his lover's departing form before grinning down at Evelyn.

"I'll keep him safe, Boss."

Crossing her arms, Evelyn regarded him with a raised eyebrow. "Good, you better. If he comes back bleeding and bruised, I'm kicking your ass." With that promise, she left the laughing Qunari to return to the ballroom. The trek there, however, was lonesome as her mind ran over the many thoughts and possibilities of her companions getting severely hurt. The thoughts stayed with her even as she entered the music filled room, her nose scrunching at the smell of many perfumes merging together.

"Inquisitor Trevelyan, a moment of your time please." A heavy accented voice drew Evelyn from her ill thoughts. A voice that made her stomach churn and the itch to punch the person blooming in her hand. Turning, Evelyn gave the woman a bored stare when she really wanted to glare her hatred at the the woman.

"Duchess Florianne, what can I help you with?"

 


	17. Checkmate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which death and regret makes a victory for everyone turn into a tragic one for Evelyn

Evelyn had to force her hands to remain at her sides as they shook with temptation to punch the blonde Orlesian bitch standing before. Florianne had a smug face, already thinking she won the Game this evening.

"We met briefly, I am Grand Duchess Florianne de Chalon's. Welcome to my party." The woman used her title to make Evelyn feel lower than her but it didn't work. Evelyn wanted to scoff at the nonsense but kept her demeanor polite and sophisticated.

"Is there something I can do for you, Your Grace?" Evelyn asked, not bothering to introduce herself or say 'thank you' for having her here. She even tried her hardest to keep the resentment from Evelyn's voice.

With a fake, kind smile and the air of equally fake politeness, Florianne nodded. "Indeed you can. I believe tonight you and I are both concerned by the actions of...a certain person." Oh how Evelyn wanted to roll her eyes but she ended up raising an eyebrow as the duchess moved towards the stairs that led to the dance floor. "Come, dance with me. Spies will not hear us on the dance floor."

 _Not your spies nor Gaspard's would hear us but Leliana's will._ Evelyn thought to herself as she took a moment to ponder what could happen if she were to dance with the Grand Duchess. The pondering had her eyes drifting up and over Florianne's shoulder, landing on her parents that stood next to her commander. It took a second but their eyes met across the room and the concern was palpable in them. Her mother was paler than she was just a moment ago but her father held an air of confidence for his daughter and that helped solidify Evelyn's resolve.

"Very well. Shall we dance, Your Grace?"

***********

It took a moment for Evelyn to remember the male roll of this Orlesian dance but once it came to her, she gracefully guided Florianne across the glistening floor below them. If Evelyn were to be the male, she wanted to be damn good at it; even in high heels and a dress.

"You are from the Free Marches, are you not? How much do you know about our little war?"

Little war? Call it a childish one. "I assure you, the effect of this war reach far beyond the borders of the Orlesian Empire." Evelyn stated calmly even though she didn't really care about the war. All she cared about what having Celene remain on the throne.

Florianne gave a light laugh as they turned their bodies towards each other, Evelyn's hand coming to rest on the duchess' waist. "Perhaps it does. I shoud not be surprised to find the empire is the center of everyone's world." Not really but Evelyn couldn't tell her that. Evelyn couldn't allow herself to be revealed like that. "It took a great effort to arrange tonight's negotiations. Ye one party would use this occasion for blackest treason." _You and your brother obviously._ "The security of the empire is at stake. Neither one of us wishes to see it fall."

"Do we both want that, Lady Florianne?" Evelyn asked, slightly hinting that Evelyn already knows more than she lets on. Evelyn, just to spite Florianne, also used a title lesser than Grand Duchess. Her title.

But if it fazed the duchess, she didn't show it as Evelyn spun her around with practiced grace. "I hope we are of one mind on this."

 _Ohoho, we are not._ "In times like these, it's hard to tell friend from foe, is it not, Your Grace?" Silence issued after Evelyn asked a question Florianne didn't have an answer to. They continued their dance, the coupling attracting positive attention by curious onlookers.

"I know you arrived here as a guest of my brother, Gaspard. And have been everywhere in the palace..." Florianne began but her voice was a degree quieter as she followed Evelyn's lead. "You are a curiosity to many, Inquisitor...and a matter of concern to some."

"Am I the curiosity or the concern to you, Your Grace?" Evelyn watched Florianne's eyes flicker way quicker than a blink but Evelyn saw it and was pleased she finally affect the duchess.

"A little of both, actually." The blonde confessed and a spin followed after that. "This evening is of great importance, Inquisitor. I wonder what role you will in it. But, do you even yet know who is friend and who is foe? Who in the court can be trusted?"

 _Certainly not you, you daft woman._ "An excellent question. I might ask the same of you, Your Grace." Evelyn felt Florianne's hand tighten a bit, a telltale sign that the duchess is failing at getting answers from Evelyn and she knew it.

"In the Winter Palace, everyone is alone. It cannot have escaped your notice that certain parties are engaged in dangerous machinations tonight."

It was Evelyn's turn to finally laugh but it was a soft one. "I thought 'dangerous machinations' were the nation sport in Orlais." Evelyn could tell that the dance was drawing to a close as the music slowed and they resumed their walking across the dance floor with arms out.

"You have little time." The duchess warned, the music stopping and they were edging on the end of the dance floor. After a second or two, the blonde let go of Evelyn's hand and faced her. "The attack will come soon. You must stop Gaspard before he strikes. In the Royal Wing Garden, you will find the captain of my brother's mercenaries. He knows all Gaspard's secrets. And I'm sure you can persuade him to be forthcoming."

"We'll see what the night has in store, won't we?" Evelyn narrowed her eyes, confused as to why exactly Florianne was selling out her brother. Surely, more things were happening that Evelyn couldn't quite see. But she left the duchess, not bothering to look back at the snake as she climbed up the stairs only to have Josephine rush up to Evelyn.

"Were you just dancing with the duchess?" The ambassador appeared to be in awe at what Evelyn has done. "You should do this more often."

"I'd gladly dance..just not with Corypheus." Evelyn teased, her nerves finally settling down when Leliana, Cullen, and her parents wandered over to her and Josie. That's when an argument broke out about who should get the throne. It baffled Evelyn to know that two of her three advisers were willing to sacrifice Celene to cease Corypheus' plans. So Evelyn put her foot down an declared that they'll save Empress Celene, no matter what.

************

"Gaspard did it no doubt. He already threatened a Council member." Evelyn concluded as she traveled up the stairs leading to the Royal Wing with her inner circle following closely behind. Dorian and Vivienne just gave her a run down of what happened. Briala proposed a possible alliance, Venatori agents killing off elven servants, a Council member dead with a dagger buried in his chest. Cole even gave Evelyn an elven locket that was in the vault. He then proceeded in spewing cryptic messages about love and remembrance which ended with Evelyn showing the locket to both Briala and Celene.

"You sure you want to do this? We could easily take care of it." Dorian asked for the fourth time, his hand easing an ebony curl back into place on Evelyn's head. While he did that, Sera was busy untying the sash around Evelyn's waist.

"I have to do this, Dorian." Evelyn insisted as she tugged her gloves off and handed them over to Sera who was folding Evelyn's white sash. They entered the room in silence then Evelyn started to undress herself. Though Evelyn wanted to tear the dress apart and toss it out, she handed the offending mass of fabric over to Vivienne before taking her battle gear from Bull's arms.

As Evelyn slid her daggers onto her back, she noticed that something was off about the air around them. It twisted and turned by an invisible forced, making the hairs on the back of her neck stand with alarm.

"I don't like this one bit." Solas voiced his discomfort and Evelyn nodded in agreement before walking over to a desk covered in papers and books. She looked over the items, tugging on her fingerless leather gloves then made her way up the stairs.

"Stand ready, everyone." After her order, Cassandra unsheathed her sword and came up to walk beside Evelyn as was usual.

Then there was a scream.

Without a second thought, Evelyn changed course to a nearby door and slammed it open. Doing so presented a scene of a harlequin stalking towards a frantic elf as she scooted away from the approaching attacker. That's when Evelyn charged forward, her quick nimble legs making short work across the room before she lifted one booted foot and slammed it into the harlequin's stomach.

The 'vint gasped before tumbling over the windows ledge and falling to her possible death. Evelyn stayed near the window, gazing down into the darkness as Solas moved forward to comfort the panicking elf.

"You're safe now, da'len." Solas informed in a soft voice, trying to soothe the elven woman as much as possible.

"Briala told me to come here. I should have never trusted her, even when I knew her before she become Celene's pet." The woman spat, venom dripping off each word that fell from the elf's mouth.

"It takes a lot of guts to come here unarmed." Evelyn said, finally moving away from the window when she knew the attacker wouldn't the assault a second time. Evelyn knelt beside the heavy breathing elf, seeing that Solas only got her to calm down just a little. "Go to Commander Cullen. He'll keep you safe."

The elf stood and thanked Evelyn for her timely rescue before Solas suggested he escort the young woman to their commander. They all left the room and headed over to the room beside the one they were just in.

As Evelyn got closer, the air stirred more and it was a bad sign. But she entered the room without hesitation, only to be greeted by archers, a tied up man on a post, and a crackling noise of an unopened rift above.

"Shit." Evelyn cursed when Florianne came into view on the balcony above. "Sorry, if you're looking for a dance partner I'm a bit busy at the moment."

"Shame. Though I didn't expect you to come, everything is going according to plan. Just think, who would've thought that I will assassinate Celene and kill the Inquisitor in one night. Corypheus will be so proud of me." Florianne was bubbling with excitement and it was something Evelyn rolled her eyes at.

"Well, he should get used to disappointments by now." Evelyn laughed, her eyes flickering to the sealed rift above before looking back at the blonde bitch.

"All I need to do is keep you out of the way long enough to strike." Florianne was stupid. Stupid enough to tell Evelyn her plans. Florianne assumed that Evelyn would die to some petty archers and soldiers. Evelyn wanted to laugh at the blunt stupidity but it froze on her tongue one a familiar face came up beside her.

Davik Trevelyan.

And he didn't stand there out of his own free will. His hands were bound behind his back while a white cloth was wrapped around his head to keep his mouth shut. Anger washed over Evelyn, her hands a shaking mess at her sides. She watched tears roll down her father's cheeks, regret and fear clouding his intelligent blue eyes.

"I'm sure you don't want to see your father die right before your eyes. So be a good girl and stay there and perish." Florianne said, relishing in the torment she just presented. "Better yet, let's see that hope and determination inside of you flicker out."

Eyes widening with realization of what Florianne planned on doing, Evelyn took a step forward. "You lay one fin-" Evelyn was interrupted with the duchess taking on thin bladed knife and running it smoothly across her father's neck. In the wake of her blade, dark red liquid seeped out from the cut widening across his neck. Davik Trevelyan's gurgling sound filled the air, the sound echoing in Evelyn's ears.

Florianne gave a wicked grin then casually tipped the lord over the railing and put an end to him by letting Evelyn's father plunge to his death.

"Kill her." The duchess demanded before leaving the area.

 Eyes still on the motionless heap on the stone group, an angry shout tore from her throat. Tears clouded her vision but Evelyn rose her hand towards the rift and pulled it open, letting demons pour from the blasted thing.

_This is just one big dream. A nightmare. None of this is real. It can't be real. That's not my father laying dead there. It has to be some illusion. It has to be._

It wasn't and Evelyn knew that but she fought logic with fantasy as she leaped into battle along side her companions. Even as she fought, her father's body was present in the corner of her vision and that made her fight even harder. She tore the soldiers and archers up with a spin of her blades. A dismembered limb here and a slit throat there, the demons helped with the carnage. They savagely created strips of red oozing lines down unfortunate chests but some demons blew up into a gory mess by Evelyn's quick strikes.

The battle ended with Evelyn sealing the rift for good before she sprinted over to her dead father.

"Dad?" Evelyn tentatively touched his cold cheek, wiping away the blood that ran down from his matted hair. His head hitting the stone after the fall ended his life quicker than a slit throat would. Evelyn would like to think that he didn't suffer long but then again, he suffered this whole night. Her father was a pawn to be used against Evelyn, just to keep her at bay. Evelyn thought that if she were to remain in the ballroom, her parents would be safe.

And she chided herself for thinking that way.

Of course Florianne would use her parents right when she knew Evelyn had to be present for something or another.

As Evelyn hunched over the body of her father, Bull took charge in talking to the mercenary captain that was tied up. The conversation lead to Bull getting some useful information and hiring the captain and his band of mercenaries in the process. With that, Evelyn knew it was time to leave and finally confront Florianne. So she stood after kissing her father's pale cheek and faced her inner circle.

They all stared with mixed emotions but pity wasn't any other them.

"It's time to end this."

***************

"Inquisitor!" Cullen's voice was the first thing Evelyn heard when she strolled into the ballroom, still dressed in her gear rather than her dress. She knew she looked like a horrific sight to all those who looked at her. Blood nearly became second clothing on her, her hair lost its bouncy curls, makeup slightly smudged, and her blue eyes sparked with undeniable anger and vengeance.

"What in Maker's name happened to you? Where's your father? He left for the bathroom minutes ago and has yet to return." Evelyn's mother, Petra, whined from beside Cullen. As much as Evelyn wanted to punch her mother to shut her up, Evelyn settled for a glare.

"Dead." Was all she said as an explanation to what happened to her father. But that was enough to have Petra crying out, her hands coming together over her stomach as Petra rocked back and forth.

"Evelyn, it's almost time for Celene's speech. What are you going to do now?" Cullen asked, not commenting on the death of her father. Which was fine. Now wasn't the time to recap on the events that took place. Evelyn would just have to postpone the discussion till later.

"I'm going to have a talk with the Grand Duchess." Evelyn announced and ignored the protests falling from Cullen's mouth. Evelyn took the stairs down to the dance floor that was clear of dancers. This was the route Evelyn was going to take in order to confront the Orlesian Duchess. By walking across the marble floor, covered in blood and dressed in leather rather than silk, Evelyn drew the attention of every noble decorating the room.

"Grand Duchess Florianne." Evelyn's voice rose up above the gasps that rang out. The suddenness of Evelyn's voice made Florianne jump in surprised before turning to face the Inquisitor with fearful eyes. "All of Thedas is watching us, so do remember to smile. This is your party after all."

"Inquisitor?" Florianne blinked many times as Evelyn clasped her hands behind her back and started to climb up the short flight of stairs.

"I wasn't sure you would save me this last dance since you did say 'I need you out long enough to strike'." Evelyn had even more nobles gasping in shock but she didn't stop there. "You went so far as to pin a Council member's death on your brother while you have Tevinter agents sneak in into the palace."

"Is this true?" Gaspard asked his frantic sister and when she stepped towards him, the duke held his hands up before following Briala.

"You don't actually believe her?" Florianne spun around, directing the question to her cousin.

"That's for the judge to decide. Guards, seize the duchess." Celene ordered, armored guards stepping forward to do her bidding. As they drew closer, so did Evelyn until she was almost nose to nose with the horrified duchess. 

"I should kill you right now in the name of my father. However," dropping her voice an octave or two, Evelyn leaned forward so her mouth was near the blonde's ear. "The Empire will mostly hand you over to me for judgement. There, with me on my chair, I have plans for you and none of them are pretty." Evelyn promised before stepping away and nodding to the guards to apprehend the shocked faced duchess. 

Once she was escorted from the room, Evelyn looked up at the pleased looking Empress. "I believe we have matter to discuss, Your Grace."

**************

On the balcony, alone, Evelyn ran tonight's events through her head. Gaspard was arrested with treason and Evelyn was successful in reuniting Celene with her lover, Briala. To them, things ended in a happy way. For Evelyn, not quite so much.

For their bloody damn peace, Evelyn's father died. Though Celene made mention of honoring the passing of her father, Evelyn knew Celene did that for appearances sake. Everything was for appearances. In her opinion, Evelyn's fathers death was just one stepping stone towards peace. It was enough to drive Evelyn forward to confront Florianne and it satisfied the Empress.

That's why Evelyn couldn't handle being in that room any longer. She didn't want to hear nobles laugh and cheer, she didn't want to hear her mother sobbing in a corner while Josie tried to comfort her. When she left, Morrigan greeted her.

Evelyn was thankful for seeing a familiar face and was even more thankful to know that the mage will join her at Skyhold.

"Tired?" Cullen asked, joining her as Evelyn leaned forwards on the railing.

"It's been a really long night." Evelyn said on a sigh, her hand running through her redone hair. After making deals with the Empress, Dorian and Vivienne whisked her away to freshen the Inquisitor up and putting her back into a lung choking dress. It was the white one again. The only dress available on hand since her green one was never found.

"I have an idea." Cullen announced, stepping away which had Evelyn sighing even more before straightening her posture.

"Cullen, I-"

"Would you care to dance, my lady?" Cullen held his hand out in a gentleman fashion, his irresistible lips curling into a smirk Evelyn absolutely loved. This caused Evelyn to smile and grab his hand without a second thought.

"I thought you didn't dance." Evelyn teased, remembering the conversation they had about an hour or so ago.

"For you, I'll try." Her commander drew her in towards his body before wrapping an arm around her waist to keep her close. Cullen's warmth comforted Evelyn as their bodies swayed back and forth to the quiet tunes that flowed out from the palace. The sturdiness of his body and the support in which Cullen gave Evelyn had tears forming in the corner of her eyes.

And there, in his strong arms, Evelyn allowed herself turn into a crying mess. 


	18. Someday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which...this chapter is something different!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I decided to make a chapter about Elissa and Alistair. Maybe next I'll make a chapter about Hawke and Anders?

Her breath came out as a puffy white cloud, floating up and up till it disappeared into the cold mountain air. Elissa, with slightly numb hands, tightened her maroon cloak around her shivering body while her horse trudged through the deep snow of the Ferelden Frostbacks. Anyone that lived outside of Ferelden would hate its weather and all the snow that falls once the plant life died. But Elissa loved Ferelden. She loved her home.

"I suggest we camp here for the night." Her husband's, Alistair, voice rang out over the sound of crunching snow and the cling of armor. His wise words met no objections as his many guards stopped and began unloading the horses quickly and efficiently. 

Elissa knew she could continue on for a few more hours but that was only because she's been out on the road for months now. She also didn't like wasting time but she didn't want to push Alistair nor his guards. Hell, if Elissa wanted to, she could stay on her horse and leave them all. They were going to split ways soon after all.

"Elissa, please, just a few hours of rest." Alistair was suddenly at her side, his honey brown eyes pleading. 

Elissa couldn't say no.

With a light sigh, the wandering warden swung her leg over the horse then slid off, thankful that her legs could hold her weight. 

 _I guess days on horseback can do that._ Elissa thought to herself as she placed her gloved hand into the hand Alistair kindly offered. In truth, she missed being able to hold his hand. When they announced their love for each other during the Blight, they held hands whenever they could. Of course the show of affection made Morrigan sick and it caused Wynne to lecture Elissa but the warden enjoyed every moment of it. That was until her Warden-Commander days came.

That brought on the slowly growing loneliness inside of her.

Separated from her lover, Elissa had to deal with troubling things alone for the first time. Sure she had a new set of companions and Elissa even had Oghren but she couldn't run to Alistair when things got tough. And it certainly did. During the Blight, Elissa had Alistair's shoulder to cry on or she could hold his hand to help anchor her down when shit just kept getting worse.  In Amaranthine, her only source of comfort was Ander's cat, Ser Pounce-a-lot, or beating the shit out of Nathaniel whenever he wanted to duel.

Eventually, after all the events with the Mother and the Architect ended, Elissa returned home to Alistair. They spent many years happy together. The two traveled to different villages to help sort out problems and dealt with everlasting political bullshit. But, in the middle of the night, Elissa slipped out from the warm comfort that was Alistair's body and left Denerim without a word. Yes, that was harsh of her to vanish and not leave a note behind but Elissa didn't want her husband getting caught up in more problems than necessary. Had she told him, the man would get down on his knees and beg Elissa to join her. She didn't want that.

And she didn't plan on ever telling him. Elissa wanted to return home with an answer to their problem. She wanted to keep searching without worrying if Alistair, had her known why, would leave his important duties behind to chasing possibly false hope. But that plan flew out of the window when Alistair suddenly popped up at Skyhold. And in order to talk to the Inquisitor, Elissa had to spill the beans in front of Alistair too. 

He took the news well, as did Leliana whom Elissa missed just as much as she missed Alistair. And surprisingly, Alistair didn't ask to join Elissa on her quest. Instead he told her that he would keep the bed warm for when Elissa returns. 

Then suddenly, a hand on her cold, red tinged cheek broke Elissa from her constant marathon of thoughts. It was Alistair's hand and once knowing that, Elissa leaned into the touch and placed her own hand over his. Oh, how she missed this adorable man.

"You look like you're about to cry. It almost reminds me of when I gave you that rose." Alistair's voice went soft at the memory, the same one Elissa just now remembered.

"Who knew you were so romantic. Especially during a crisis." Elissa teased, earning a hefty laugh from her husband.

"Hey, I was just being honest." He retorted before leaning forward and kissing forward. The kiss barely lasted a second until he was off helping soldiers distribute bed rolls and blankets. So Elissa took this as a chance to scout the perimeter for any possible threats. One would think someone of nobility would let a man of service secure the area but it was a habit Elissa quickly developed since her time traveling during the Blight.

Before Elissa could even think about retiring for the night, the area surrounding the camp would earn at least five more checks until she deemed it safe enough to sleep. But that was usually when Elissa was traveling with a group. Now that she moved about Ferelden and elsewhere alone, Elissa's sleeping hours shortened and her scouting grew longer.

But this time around, she forced herself to only limit scout the area once before returning to the large camp that was set up. Tents and campfires decorated the space in front of Elissa, soldiers mulling about as they talked about this and that while some prepped tonight's dinner.

Elissa's trek across the camp had guards standing at attention and saluting. Even with her hood up and only dressed in light leather armor and her sword, they knew who Elissa was. She was the Queen of Ferelden, the Hero of said place, Warden-Commander, and the last few remaining Cousland. Elissa's time on the road almost made her forget that she was married to a king. Whenever she ventured into town, Elissa made sure to hide who she was. So when she suddenly had all this attention and recognition on her, it weirded her out a bit.

"I take it you went out for a 'stroll'?" Alistair spoke as soon as Elissa opened the flap to their shared tent. He already knew what she went to do, having seen her scan the area like a paranoid hen many times during their travels together. In truth, it made her all the more endearing to him.

"You can never be too sure." Elissa assured as she tugged her snow covered boots off and placed them next to the exit. Her emerald eyes, however, were locked onto the muscular back of Alistair. While she was gone, the man stripped himself of his upper clothing so he could sit down next to a wash basin and clean away the sweat and dirt of today's travels.

She knew that slightly pale, smooth body to every last detail on it. Elissa knew what rugged scar came from which battle. She spent countless of nights curled up against his side and ran her finger tip along each one of them, retelling how Alistair came to obtain it. When he got the wounds, it wasn't a laughing matter since most put his life in danger but now, years after, Elissa could tease him about how clumsy Alistair was.

"Elissa?" Her name came out of Alistair's mouth like a question and that question helped Elissa realize that she had crossed the tent and now had her arms around his head. She had to lean down just a tad to do it since Alistair was sitting on a chest so he could clean himself. But Elissa can't seem to recall ever commanding her body to walk over and hug him from behind. But that's what she was doing right now.

Burying her face in the curve of his neck, Elissa tightened the embrace just a fraction. "I have missed you so much, Alistair." Her voice came out slightly strained as sudden tears threatened to spill over. Alistair didn't say or do anything, he just allowed her to hug him. And he shouldn't have to do anything. Elissa was the one to leave him suddenly, without word and still didn't explain several months later. She left Alistair to fall into depression, to cry at night in their bed and Elissa was too selfish to do anything about it.

And so she let her tears fall.

The salty drops of water rolled down her still reddened cheeks and she didn't stop them. 

"Oh, sweetheart." Alistair turned at the first touch of a warm tear on his neck. Elissa allowed her husband to tugged her down onto his strong lap even though she wanted Alistair to yell at her, to push her away. But instead he tenderly swiped away her tears with his thumb, his eyes full of love for her.

"I'm so sorry." Elissa managed to squeeze out, her body curling instinctively against her lovely. That was when Alistair undid the snap on her cloak and gently slid it off her body. His own warm body rocked her shivering one back and forth, his mouth near her ear as Alistair whispered sweet nothings in attempt to calm down his wife.

But she cried and cried. As Elissa cried, Alistair soothed her pain away.

He kept rocking her until Elissa's crying settled into pesky hiccups, her eyes no longer producing tears. Even without saying a word, Elissa knew that Alistair forgave her stupid self. He always forgave her. Each stupid decision she made, ones he didn't entirely agree with, Alistair stood by her side and forgave her. Even without saying it, he forgave Elissa for making Alistair sleep with Morrigan. In a way, Alistair was thankful she did. If Alistair died, Elissa wouldn't be able to live with herself and the same way goes for her husband.

Elissa loved her Alistair.

And so she kissed him. Snotty nose and all, Elissa's lips collided with his soft, warm ones and it was exactly how she remembered. From their first kiss onward, it felt like each kiss was their first kiss. It was all nerve tingling, stomach fluttering, heart racing, and light headed and it was wonderful.

"Elissa." Alistair breathed her name like a revered pray once the kiss broke. Elissa placed her suddenly bare hand on his beating chest, watching as he closed those eyes she could forever stare into.

"Please." She pleaded quietly, leaning in again to lightly brush her lips against his. And Alistair wasted no more time. This time the kiss was full of need for each other, full of hope that one day they could share the same bed again, share the same table, share the same carriage, share the same bath. Hope was something they needed right now. Hope that things don't turn for the worse.

And as Alistair's hand crept down her body, Elissa's heart sped up and her body automatically arched into the touch. The journey of his hand resulted into buckles becoming undone and the strings of her pants being loosened. Anticipation bubbled inside of Elissa as she maneuvered on Alistair's lap to straddle him, her knees coming to rest on the chest beside his thighs. This position had her lower half hovering slightly over Alistair's and it would be so easy for him to take her right now.

But Alistair liked being patient and loving. He loved to kiss all over her body, marking her before entering her and Elissa loved it all. Yet, she needed him and Alistair seemed to need her just as much.

Without breaking from the kiss, Elissa wiggled out of her jacket, gloves quickly following after. Alistair, on the other hand, was helping her by sliding her pants down and soon her smalls. Eventually they had to separate so Elissa can yank her tunic off, her bare skin hitting the heated air around them. But Alistair wasn't satisfied with the amount of skin showing. Quickly but gently, Alistair removed the last barrier that was keeping them from skin to skin even though his pants were still on.

"Alistair.." Elissa breathed as Alistair kissed her neck that he exposed by brushing her stubborn curls away. Elissa's hands came up to run them through his soft golden strands as his lips traveled down until he nipped at one of her breasts. She arched into the touch, her action silently begging him and he rewarded her with his clever tongue swirling around the nub.

Even though his mouth was concentrated there, his hands kept wandering down; one in front and one pressed firmly into the small of her back to keep Elissa balanced. And a gasp flew from her mouth as Alistair's nimble fingers teased her below. Heat washed through her, the urge to sink down onto those fingers so strong, Alistair had to wind his arm around Elissa's waist to keep her firmly against his body.

"And here I thought I was eager." Alistair laughed which ended with his lip returning to hers. Elissa kissed him back, her lips parting to allow her husband's tongue to dance with hers. Each swipe of his tongue had more heating pooling at the bottom of her stomach as his fingers resumed teasing her until one finally found its way in.

This had Elissa's mouth dropping open on a silent gasp. She rocked her hips back into the touch and Alistair's finger curled along a bundle of nerves that had Elissa whimpering for more. That resulted in Alistair adding a second finger.

"I..." a gasp interrupted her, her husband's fingers doing wicked things to her. "I need you now, husband." Alistair groan at the heated need in Elissa's voice, her own nimble fingers working on the ties on his trousers. He helped in the effort but before Elissa can free himself from the confines of his leathers, Alistair effortless lifted his wife up into the air and carried her like she weighed nothing over to their bed roll.

Once there, Alistair gently laid her naked form onto the soft bedding before following her down. His fit himself comfortable between Elissa's parted thighs, his erection becoming obvious as it pressed up against her entrance. But before they continued, the two of them took at moment to stare longingly at each other. Alistair and Elissa wanted to remember this moment, not knowing when it might happen against.

Elissa reached up and cupped both sides of his handsome face with her hands. "I love you, Alistair Theirin. Remember that." Elissa confessed as different kind of tears welled up in her eyes. These were tears of joy, happiness, love for her strong and supportive husband.

Alistair kissed the palm of one hand as he freed the one thing that could physically connect the two of them together rather than mentally. "And I love you, Elissa Theirin-Cousland. Forever and always." And he sank into her, the sudden fullness of him had Elissa's back arching and moaning his name.

*************

"Please do be safe. I'd like for my wife to come back alive." Alistair insisted as he hoisted his wife up onto her horse. Elissa rolled her eyes at his constant nagging before leading down to peck him on the cheek.

"Yes, husband dearest." Elissa sighed lovingly, taking the leather gloves Alistair extended to her. At the sight of her preparing herself to departure, Alistair's heart clenched. He wasn't ready to let her go, it was too soon to let her wander off alone. He showed his hesitation this morning by keeping her curled up at his side for hours after when it was time to leave. The soldiers understood though.

Alistair laid a hand on Elissa's thigh, soaking in the warmth that radiated from her body. He wanted to remember this warmth for the lonely nights that were surely to come.

"Alistair, love, I need to do this. For the both of us." His loving queen reminded him and Alistair knew this was the right thing but that doesn't mean he had to like it. Just when he was finally able to hold her again, he had to lose her just as quickly. The Maker is certainly cruel on the both of them.

"Just...just let me have this moment please." Alistair said, his voice quiet and on the edge of trembling with his mounting emotions. He couldn't even look at her, knowing the sight of that beautiful face and kind eyes would surely break him. But he had to stay strong, mainly for Elissa than him.

So slowly, his eyes drifted up to meet Elissa's jewel like eyes.

"I must go, Alistair." Elissa insisted, her hand laying on top of his that was on her thigh. Alistair gave a firm, small nod before meeting her half way and kissing her for the last time in a while. He said nothing, just backed away to let his red-haired beauty rear her horse before the beast went sprinting passed him and the line of royal guards that wanted to see their queen off.

As she traveled down the slope of the mountain, Alistair, going against his calm king-like ways, rushed over to the edge of the drop. He watched her departing form, her colors a stark contrast to the white landscape.

And Alistair kept watching even as the cold wind kicked up snow all around him. He kept watching even as the guards gathered everything up and packed it all away onto the horses. But he couldn't watch forever, not when he could no longer see her off in the distance, her hair bright in the sun. He couldn't. He had a castle to return to and problems to correct.

Plus, he has a feeling he'll see his warrior queen very soon.

Someday.


	19. Loss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn reflects on what happened but Cullen is eager to distract her from such thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter! I have/had a guest over and I didn't want to spend all of the time on my computer. The next chapter will be longer though!

As soon as Evelyn returned from Halamshiral, blighted Chantry Clerics demanded that her Seeker and her Spymaster go to Val Royeaux for some reason or another. Evelyn wasn't quite sure why they had to leave since she didn't entire care to pay attention to the raving mother hen but the Inquisitor did tell the woman to allow Cassandra and Leliana to decide. And that was that.

"Inquisitor, there's a letter for you." A scout announced once he approached Evelyn as she was walking to the Herald's Rest. Grumbling under her breath, Evelyn took the letter the man held out and didn't break the seal until said man left her standing there. She just wanted to get wasted along side the merrier band of Bull's Chargers but now Evelyn has to deal with whatever problem this letter contains.

"Who's it from?" Dorian was the next one to walk up to her, the slight pink on his cheekbones a telltale sign that he was just in the tavern with Bull and the Chargers. Like usual.

"Mother most likely. It's the Trevelyan seal on this letter." Evelyn explained as she held the rolled up piece of paper up to have Dorian take a look at the wax seal. She watched as his full lips curved down into a small frown, clearly worried that whatever might be in the letter would obviously upset his best friend. And usually Evelyn would dismiss anyone around her before she opened a personal letter but whenever it came to Dorian, she wanted him to stay just in case Evelyn needed a hug.

"Well...here goes nothing." Evelyn mumbled, her fingers making quick work of breaking the seal and unrolling the tan paper.

_Dear Evelyn,_

_Even though I was grateful that the Inquisition extended an invitation for me to join their little ceremony for your father's passing, I didn't want to step foot into a place that caused his death. It's your fault, you know. Had you just returned home after the explosion at the Conclave, none of this would've happened. But no. My silly daughter had to go off and make enemies with those who disapprove of her methods and goals. Shame on you. You should've handed such a chore over to someone more reliable than you._

_But putting that to the side, just know Maxwell has just been made head of the family. He and his beautiful wife and his children should return home in about 3 months time from their trip to Nevarra. I have also sent him a missive about what happened at that dreaded place called the Winter Palace. He is greatly disappointed in your father's passing but sadly would not put the blame on his little sister. Shame._

_And to conclude this letter, I've sent this to be delivered by your brother, Arik. So do please make him comfortable at that dump you call home. I expect Arik to stay there no longer than 2 days before he is to return home._

_With much love and care,_

_Petra Trevelyan_

Evelyn's blood was boiling by the time she finished reading the blighted thing. Her face must've showed the disgust she was feeling after reading it since Dorian snatched the paper from her hands to read it himself. At some parts, Dorian read it out loud in an angry voice, becoming sober with each word his gray eyes saw. Apparently Dorian was loud enough, even sounded pissed off enough because Bull quickly exited the tavern and headed straight over to them in long strides.

When the Qunari opened his mouth to speak, Evelyn held her marked hand up to silence him as he took his place at Dorian's side. His only eye narrowing in confusion, Bull looked down over his mage's shoulder to read the letter, his one grayish-green eye moving quickly.

"Damn, Boss. You sure she's not some demon or something?" Bull remarked, his own disgust becoming visible on his face. Evelyn gave a harsh laugh at his question but proceeded not to answer as Dorian tore up the letter in a display of how pissed off he was for his best friend.

"I would offer you a drink but I suppose you have your brother to tend to. The young dreamy eyed templar correct? Poor boy." Dorian said, anger evident in his voice. This caused Bull to rest his arm on Dorian's shoulders and pull him close to Bull's gray body. It was nice to see Dorian becoming comfortable with public affection.

"Ah yes, my brother." Evelyn said dumbly, at a loss of what she could do to deal with their surprise guest. In truth, Evelyn wished that she could tell Arik to leave. He's done his job so there's no reason for him to stay at Skyhold. And besides, Evelyn didn't want to hear how it was her fault that their father was dead. She has enough of the stupid blame game from her mother.

But Evelyn had to go see where the Inquisition soldiers put her brother. So after a tight hug from Dorian and a pat on the shoulder from Bull, Evelyn turned around and climbed up the stairs to enter the Main Hall of Skyhold. As always, pesky nobles decorated the place as they talked about nonsense and shit that wasn't of important but her attention was drawn to a man wearing templar armor.

And he was standing next to her commander.

As Evelyn grew closer, whatever conversation the two men had drew to a close once Arik noticed her approach. His sudden distraction brought Cullen's attention onto her and it was nice to have him by her for this. Evelyn doesn't know how much family bullshit she could deal with. Alone, at that.

"Sister." Arik greeted once Evelyn stood face to face with him. There wasn't so much as a handshake shared between them, not even a nod or a friendly hello. No. None of that. There was only the acknowledgement that Arik knew who Evelyn was and the relation.

"Arik, it's a pleasure to see you here. I trust Commander Cullen made you feel welcomed?" Evelyn asked with a fake kindness she perfected over the years. It helps when dealing with nobles she doesn't entirely care for and her sour mother.

"I chose a room overlooking the gardens for him to rest in for the next couple of days." Cullen informed, his manner all business-like. Evelyn only nodded before stepping passed the two men to held over to her big fancy chair.

"Everyone has a choice and you chose to let him die."

Evelyn froze with one foot on the steps.

Ever so slowly, she turned to gaze back at her brother with wide eyes. Even Cullen seemed shocked with Arik's sudden spiteful outburst. And Arik, on the other hand, showed no guilt for what he told his sister. He actually seemed resolute of it and his gray eyes shined the hate that couldn't quite present itself in Arik's voice.

Blinking back the sudden tears stinging her eyes, Evelyn lifted her chin to hide the fact that her brother's words did indeed hurt her. "Well, I'm sure you can find your way back to your room, yes?" And with that, she turned her back on her once favorite sibling and ignored the departing footsteps of her brother.

"Evelyn?" Cullen was there at her side in a flash as Evelyn sat heavily onto her chair with a defeated sigh. As Evelyn relaxed, Cullen busied himself in taking a hold of her hands and rubbing her knuckles with his thumbs. "I have an idea."

"Oh yeah? Let's hear it." Evelyn said, closing her eyes to block out the curious glances of the nobles that stood around. Whenever Cullen had an idea, they were very good ideas. Some of them lead the duo to get in trouble by an angry Josephine or get pointers from Sera on how to deliver pranks. But most idea ended with them laying together, limbs tangles, and hearts racing as his fingers crept up Evelyn's bare back. 

Yeah, his ideas were always good ideas.

And she was pleased to know that Cullen's idea would lead them out of Skyhold to have time alone together. 


	20. Severed Bonds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn finally puts her foot down and Cullen protects her...but from what?

"Where are we?" Evelyn asked for the third time since her and Cullen left their horses near a patch of tall grass, her commander leading her to a lightly fogged area.

"Well, just to find moments of peace, I would used to come here." Cullen shared, grabbing Evelyn's hand to steady her when she nearly tripped over a rock. Unfamiliar with the area, Evelyn drew closer to Cullen and trusted the man to lead the way for once.

After Evelyn's little meeting with her brother, Cullen insisted to take her out to clear her mind and give her a moment of silence and peace. And of course, he knew about the letter but didn't know what it said. So Evelyn enlightened him on the obvious hatred her mother presented in the letter. If Evelyn didn't explain it to Cullen now, Dorian would have surely told the commander but with more colorful words.

And so here they are, walking side by side as Cullen lead the curious Inquisitor to a spot he used to go to when he was just a boy. Evelyn's heart warmed at the thought of Cullen sharing a little more of his childhood with her, even going as far as taking her to a spot he used to frequently visit. In truth, Evelyn doesn't really know much about Cullen's childhood, or him really. She feel in love with the today Cullen, not the past.

But she knew that Cullen was the second eldest of four children. Mia, his eldest sister, was his favorite sibling and the one he was closest too. Her support of Cullen becoming a templar drew them closer and to this day, the two of them still write letters to each other. Evelyn also knows that his mother and father didn't survive the family's escape when the Blight spread like wildfire across Ferelden.

Maybe some day Evelyn would like to take Cullen to his home town of Honnleath.

"Here we are." Cullen announced, moving away from Evelyn to rest his lean figure on a wooden post. Raising an eyebrow, Evelyn spared a glance at Cullen before walking towards the end of the dock to gaze over the lake before them. 

And it was a gorgeous sight.

The moonlight reflected perfectly off the gentle waves of the water, causing it to sparkle. Fog lightly danced across the surface, enhancing the beauty Evelyn was in awe of. Now she understood why Cullen always came here to seek peace because Evelyn had it rush through her as the sound of water licking at the shore filled her ears. Crickets played a tune with an occasional birds song and it was something Evelyn can listen to for hours.

"It's beautiful." Evelyn confessed, her eyes never leaving the water even when she heard the rustling of Cullen's armor as he moved to stand next to her. "It's so peaceful here. Thank you for showing this to me." 

"I figured you could use a moment of quiet." Cullen's consideration caused Evelyn's heart to squeeze with adoration for the man. With a soft smile, Evelyn pressed her side along his as Cullen's arm hugged her waist, their bodies molding together perfectly. 

They stood like that in comfortable silence for several long minutes until Cullen held out a silver coin to show Evelyn. She frowned at the sudden appearance of the object until Cullen started explaining the significance of it. "When I came here last, it was the day I was leaving for templar training and this is where my brother found me. He gave me this coin for luck."

"That was very thoughtful of him." Evelyn said, still not completely understanding why Cullen was showing this to her. Not that she minded but still.

Without a word, Cullen took her hand and placed the coin in it. "I'd like for you to have it."

"Cullen, I-"

The sudden placement of his gloved hand upon her cheek cut Evelyn short. Cullen didn't say anything, just merely looked at her with his honey wheat eyes, the look speaking volumes. Though Evelyn was hesitant on taking something as important as this away from Cullen, she finally nodded and gave him a fond smile as she curled her fingers around the cool object.

That seemed to satisfy the commander as he leaned in closer, his breath brushing lightly against Evelyn's slightly parted lips. And after giving him a wicked grin, Evelyn met his lips for the first time that day.

****************

He was pleased to finally see Evelyn smiling after the dreadful month she just had. Even with the shit storm that just happened, Evelyn took it all in strides and Cullen admired her strength. He only saw her break down once and that was in front of him and they were alone. That the not been the case, Cullen would guess that Evelyn would have cried herself to sleep while alone in her tower.

But right now she was laughing at a joke she just made and Evelyn padded herself on the back for how good it was. Though the joke was funny, Cullen was mainly smiling at the exquisite sight his lady was as they rode through the gates of Skyhold.

As usual, people greeted their Inquisitor and welcomed her back as soon as they slid off from their horses to hand them over to Master Dennet.

But much too soon Evelyn would have to pick up her role again when Josephine strolled up with her clipboard in hand.

"Inquisitor, Duchess Florianne has just arrived. The Empire deemed it just that you would be the one to deliver judgment for her actions." The ambassador announced in a thick accented voice. The Antivan's announcement made Evelyn sigh as she gave Cullen a roll of her eyes.

"Well, let's get this over with, shall we?" Evelyn didn't sound enthused at all as she followed Josephine across the courtyard with Cullen in tow. Usually it was Josephine who would accompany Evelyn to these judgments but Cullen wanted to be there for her this time. Evelyn is going to face her father's killer, after all.

As soon as the three of them stepped foot into the Main Hall, Cullen watched as Evelyn's back straightened and her chin drew high. She did this for appearances sake, Cullen knew that. Evelyn wanted to present herself strong and capable in front of the many nobles standing off to the sides. Yet in reality, Evelyn's posture was always lazy when not in front of 'important' people. She didn't fold one leg over the other, she didn't look down her nose at people. Her shoulders would be slumped down and her hip would be slightly cocked out as she leaned her weight to the side.

The Evelyn right now, as she strode down the hall to place herself upon her chair, Cullen didn't entirely care for. Her manner was cold until she spoke, her calculating eyes narrowed. No, Cullen loved the real Evelyn. Not the one her mother forced Evelyn to be.

"Bring the prisoner." Evelyn demanded in a deadpan voice once Cullen took his place on the opposite side of Josephine, his hand coming to rest itself on the hilt of his sword. As they waited for Florianne to show up, Cullen scanned the crowd that gathered just for this moment. Among the sea of masked nobles, Cullen spotted the faces of Evelyn's inner circle. Some stood in the crowd, some stood on the balcony above that Vivienne usually occupied.

His eyes eventually caught the gray pair that Dorian own, the mage leaning on the railing with The Iron Bull filling the empty space at his side. Cullen knew Dorian wouldn't want to miss this, all of them didn't actually, but Dorian was closest to Evelyn, blood related even.

A nod was shared between the two men until Dorian pointed down below the mage. Raising an eyebrow, Cullen tracked the direction in which Dorian pointed until eyes landed upon Evelyn's brother, Arik. Cullen frowned at the stoic look the young templar gave, not showing if he was impressed or bored with what was going on.

But the entering form of Florianne dragged his attention away from the young man. Cullen watched at the duchess was led by two guards to stand just a few steps down from where Evelyn was perched. To Cullen's surprise, the duchess still wore the getup she had on during the night of the ball but the dress was dirtied from days out on the road though her silver mask held its shine.

"Since you well know of Florianne's actions at the Winter palace, I won't waste time by addressing them now. But the Empire of Orlais seemed it was right for the Inquisitor to take matters in her own hand." Josephine stated, calm and collect as always but the Antivan woman did give the kneeling duchess a heated glare.

Everyone's attention was then turned onto the silent Herald, her cherry lips thin to show her restraining anger. A few seconds ticked by as the silence only increased the tension in the room until the duchess began to snicker.

"Does the sight of me anger you, Inquisitor? Do I conjure up horrible memories you wish to forget?" The Orlesian woman cooed, her pale pink lips forming into a sinister grin. "I bet you want to leap from that chair and end my life in the name of your poor dead father. But you won't. That's not how your little Inquisition works." With each word that flowed from that blonde made Cullen clenched the hilt of his sword tighter in efforts to suppress the urge to take said sword and plunge into her cold heart.

However, no matter how angry the woman made Cullen, Evelyn's lips turned up into a smile, one that showed her white straight teeth before she started laughing. Cullen shot Josephine a puzzled look, the ambassador giving him the same before Cullen looked back at the Inquisitor with wide eyes.

"Now that is funny." The Free Marcher finally said after seconds of laughing. Though her lips were curved with humor, Evelyn's blue eyes were alight with something darker. "Sadly, it won't be your life I'll be taking but it would be your holdings, money and land. Your title would be stripped from you. Everything of yours will be given to the poor and the homeless. Shit, I might even go as far as to make your mansions into homes for the people needing a place to stay."

"You can't do that! You have no right!" Florianne protested, her body fighting against the hands restraining her. Her pale face became a shade of deep red, a nice sign of how angry Evelyn just made Florianne.

And Cullen was enjoying it all.

"Oh? I don't, do I? The Inquisition is a government in itself and your lovely Empire knew just that when they handed you over to us. No right? I have all the right in the world once it acknowledged the Inquisition." Evelyn snapped back, her body shifting forward to glare hatefully at the fuming duchess. "But please, continue putting on a grand show, surely everyone in this room is enjoying the sight."

Cullen chuckled at what Evelyn cleverly said, even the nobles standing in the background gave a laugh of their own.

"However, that was just the punishment for your first crime. The crime of the attempt assassination on the Empress. Now, for the death of my father, Lord Davik Trevelyan, I won't grace you with the satisfaction of killing you. Remember the promise I made you just seconds before the guards apprehended you?" Florianne's lips were practically trembling as tears left wet streaks down her reddened cheeks. "You will continue to live in shame and embarrassment as a jester here in Skyhold, since you have a knack for putting on a good show."

Florianne was full on crying now, not bothering to suppress the sobs spilling from between her parted lips. Josephine gave the Inquisitor a pleased thumbs up, an action the strict ambassador rarely does. Cullen, on the other hand, kept an eye on the slowly approaching form of Arik and it was slow enough to where it didn't raise suspicion from anyone else.

"Guards, take our newly appointed jester away please." Evelyn threw Florianne's new title at her like a sharp weapon.

"So you're just going to let our father's killer still have her life when she ended his? How is that just?" Arik's voice tore through the sea of laughter from the nobles and the loud wails of Florianne. His question immediately silenced every single noise in the hall and the still approaching templar put Cullen at edge.

"Death doesn't always justify everything, brother. I believe father taught all of his children that." Evelyn softened her voice as she straightened her back to regard her brother with kind eyes. Cullen suspected the memory of her father softened the iciness she would have given Arik.

"So what? You're just going to shit on his death like that? I don't think you're even worthy of the Trevelyan name because I know for a fact Maxwell would have sliced that bitches head off without a second thought!" Arik's voice grew louder with each word, his advance becoming quicker as Cullen watched a hand wander over to his sword rested on Arik's hip.

"Arik, plea-"

"You should've came home so you can obediently spread your legs for another lord like mother wanted! Had you, father would've never died!" Arik yelled, unsheathing his sword to charge towards a wide eyed Evelyn. But the templar didn't make it more than four steps before Cullen was there, twisted Arik's sword arm behind his back and Cullen's foot slamming onto the back of one of Arik's knees. 

The brother fell heavily as Solas, Sera, Varric, Cole, Cassandra, Blackwall, and Leliana all emerged from the crowd to circle around Cullen and Arik with their weapons drawn. Josephine, on the other hand, held the standing Inquisitor back with an arm lightly curled around Evelyn's waist. More footsteps sounded until Vivienne, Dorian, and Bull came into view with Dorian immediately going to Evelyn's side to calm her down. As for Vivienne and Bull, Vivienne peeled the frantic Josephine from Evelyn while Bull entered the circle of companions to take over the restraint of Arik from Cullen.

The nobles whispers turned into loud conversations, some worried about their Inquisitor and some interested in the turn of events. But Cullen ignored them all as he slipped passed the pissed off looking Sera and the equally pissed off looking Cassandra before making his way over to his teary eyed lover.

"Managed to bewitch these people huh? What? Did you spread your legs for them too?" Arik snapped, his face contorted in rage. "I was just going to do the world a favor by killing you. It'll save a whole lot of heart ache." Cullen's hands itched to punch the man but he was still Evelyn's brother, even with how hateful he's become.

When Evelyn continued to say nothing as Dorian ran a comforting hand through her black hair, still tangled from riding on horseback, Arik looked at the inner circle surrounding him.

"Aren't you going to kill me? I've just tried killing your leader and you're just going to stand there?"

"I have a feeling Evelyn wouldn't like that, no matter what you planned on doing." Varric stated calmly, raising Bianca just a tad bit higher to aim a bolt right between Arik's eyes. 

"Shut it, you." Sera demanded, stretching her bow string back further, the usual pranking elf serious for once.

"You must think yourself smart. Ridding me out from this world just to appease ill minded people. Mainly, mother and you of course." Evelyn's voice ceased the banter that started between the members of the inner circle. Though her voice was calm, the underlining pain had Cullen reaching for one of her hands, her marked one. That was when he knew the calmness was just a front, for her hand was trembling in his grasp as she tightened her grip on Cullen's hand.

"I know you for who you truly are. You use and manipulate people. You'll lie with just about any man who whispered promises of gold and higher holdings." Arik hissed, his eyes reflecting just how much the man detested his sister. "With everything you've done, you have no right to stand there and play hero. To be placed higher than men. You, my dear sister, belong on a bed and in the kitchen."

A loud smack sounded after the insult.

Cullen watched their Seeker lower her hand to point her sword once again at the man. Cullen then looked at Evelyn to see her reaction to her brother getting hit. He was expecting a disappointed frown or a shake of her head but instead Evelyn smiled softly at her friend before shifting to attention back to her red cheeked brother.

"I'll be sending a letter to both mother and Maxwell about what occurred and how your stay here has been shortened a day. In just a few minutes, you are to be escorted back to your room. Guards will be placed outside your door and you are not to walk about Skyhold without a guard and our lovely Seeker here." Evelyn said, her eyes never leaving Arik's widening ones. "Should you step out of line or show any inclination of doing ill things to anyone here at Skyhold, Lady Cassandra will do as she pleases to keep you in line." And with that, Evelyn nodded at Bull to release his hold on Arik so Cassandra could step forward to take custody of the man.

"A woman, let alone you, have no right to order me around. I thought you knew your place by now when it came to us Free Marchers." Arik spat just as Evelyn started to turn around to speak softly to Dorian. But Cullen felt Evelyn's body stiffen before she stormed forward, releasing Cullen's hand to ball her's up into fists.

And she nailed the brute right in the nose.

Arik cried out as his nose made a crunch noise and Evelyn shook her hand out to relieve the pain the punch caused.

"I am your Inquisitor and this is my fortress. What I say, goes and you best remember that." Evelyn growled, her voice chilling as her blue eyes lost whatever warmth she held for her blighted brother. Cassandra wasted no time in dragging the bleeding templar out of the hall as Dorian quickly went over to Evelyn to check on her reddened hand.

"I'll clear the hall out." Vivienne said before her and Josephine hurried passed Cullen to politely shoo the gossiping nobles. The remainder of the inner circle planned a game of Wicked Grace tonight to help cheer their Inquisitor up and Cullen immediately agreed to join them.

"Luckily, your hand is not broken but please do try not to repeat that again." Cullen heard Dorian insist as the commander drew closer to the two cousins. Evelyn laughed softly at Dorian's worrying before patting his cheek with her unhurt hand.

"I don't make promises I can't keep." Evelyn said, warmth returning to her voice. "Go on, Dorian, I'm fine. I'll see you later."

"Everyone is meeting up for Wicked Grace tonight at the tavern." Cullen announced and Dorian seemed reluctant to leave Evelyn after everything that just happened. But the 'vint finally gave in and left with Bull after a kiss on Evelyn's cheek. Finally alone, Evelyn immediately rushed into Cullen's open arms with a soft sob, her hands bunching up the coat Cullen wore.

"C'mon, how about you get some rest." Cullen suggested and Evelyn's response was a tiny nod of her head. He shifted the crying Herald to his side as his arm tightened around her in effort to comfort her and to show he was there for her, no matter what Arik said.

True or not, it didn't deteriorate the love Cullen had for this stubborn, strong, smart, fantastic of a woman.

No.

It made him love her more. 

 


	21. Confessions from the Selfish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn truly pours her heart out about what she went through because of her family and Cullen is there to comfort her

_A sharp smack had Evelyn's back springing straight up, stiffening like a board as her mother came into view with a flogger in her hands._

_"Do remember to keep your back straight and chin raised. I don't want you slouching like some whore you pretend to be." Petra Trevelyan hissed, her uncaring eyes causing Evelyn's stomach to curl. Evelyn has been sitting here for an hour now. Practicing the arts of ladyship, a demand her mother made once one of Evelyn's pesky brothers spilled the beans how Evelyn was sleeping with one of the Empress' soldiers that was passing through._

_And Lady Petra presumed that this was Evelyn's seventh man she has bedded._

_No._

_Her first._

_And Evelyn wanted him to be her last._

_The man whispered tender promises of knighting her into the royal army. He saw her skill in battle when they dueled behind a tavern. How the duel started was by the Orlesian man boasting about how talented he was with his 'sword' in said tavern and Evelyn, laughing over a tankard of ale, challenged him to see just how talented he claimed to be._

_To be honest, the man did indeed put on a good fight against a woman in a dress with two daggers she made herself. But Evelyn had the man pinned down in less than two minutes, and she saw just how much he was in awe of her. That was when he took her up to his room and showed his talent with his other sword._

_But that action had the soldier kicked from their little town butt naked and her mother pulling Evelyn by her hair._

_Evelyn's rebelliousness started right there._

_Having forced out of training with her father, forced into would-be engagements, forced into corsets, forced into a body Evelyn felt that wasn't hers anymore; each protest that rang from her, Petra would silence it with a firm slap to Evelyn's cheek._

_The dance lasted three more years until Evelyn finally had enough. Her mother came down harder with her punishments which ended up causing Evelyn's resolve to crumble into tiny pieces she couldn't put back together. Evelyn tried. Failed. Tried again. Met more harsh barriers which made Evelyn give up. And so she became Petra's perfect little doll to do what she will with. If Petra wanted Evelyn to attend every known ball in the Free Marchers, Evelyn would. Had to. If Petra wanted Evelyn to get cozy with a possible fiance, Evelyn would. If Petra wanted Evelyn to spread her legs like Evelyn did with that soldier to an eager lord that Petra wanted an alliance with, Evelyn wouldn't even object._

_Evelyn became the dark haired beauty so many lords gossiped like women about. They shared stories about bedding her like a soldier would share war stories, right in front of Evelyn as she sat quiet and still in hopes that all of it would soon end._

_Davik tried ending the rumors, even tried putting an end to Petra's motives but he had zero results. So Evelyn watched her father look on with sympathetic eyes and thinned lips as Petra cheered at how great Evelyn was performing, that Evelyn was finally making Petra proud._

_Proud that Evelyn wasn't a rebellious whore anymore._

_Just a proper, ladylike whore now._

_*************_

Evelyn's thoughts poofed when a sudden gust of cold wind blasted her already shivering body, making Evelyn tighten Cullen's furred cape around her more.

"Sweetheart, please come into the room where it's warm." Cullen's pleading voice flowed out onto the balcony where Evelyn stood. At first, Evelyn came out here to cool her down from the long hours of her commander holding her as she cried. Again. And though her tears were long dried and her breathing back to normal, Evelyn made no move to go back to Cullen's side.

Her long bout of crying caused Evelyn to spill everything. Right from her training with Davik to Petra finally breaking Evelyn. She laid out everything before Cullen, every shameful detail and every pathetic thought. And by doing that caused her tears to spill even harder. Evelyn was afraid that Cullen, knowing her impurities, would walk out of the room and never warm her bed again. That he would never give her those damnable smirks or allow Evelyn to enjoy those warm amber eyes on her, watching her with adoration and love.

But instead the commander drew Evelyn into his arms and held her tightly, rocking her back and forth. That was when Evelyn freaked. She bolted out from his comforting embrace and rushed out onto the balcony, not explaining the sudden action.

So Cullen remained on her couch while Evelyn looked over her fortress but saw nothing.

"What is it you want, Cullen?" Evelyn asked, more like rasped since her throat was raw from the crying. "Every man wants something and sadly, there's always a woman pulling the strings. So what? Are you fucking me so Lady Petra can place a pretty little title over your pretty blond head? You wouldn't be the first." Evelyn couldn't stop herself from saying these things but she knew that sooner or later, Cullen would realize just how fucked up she is and leave. Best to get it over now before Evelyn wouldn't be able to handle the heartbreak.

But Cullen didn't say a word against her pathetic talk. No, Evelyn figured he was still sitting there like he owned the place. Like he had the right to be in her room.

And in truth, he did.

Just when Evelyn was about to open her mouth to speak, she was pulled roughly into the room by a strong grip. Evelyn fought against the pull, but Cullen dragged her ass over to the bed and angrily yanked her onto it. She gasped when her back landed heavily on the bed and the froze as she waited for Cullen to crowd her space with his body.

Yet he didn't.

He instead knelt by her legs that dangled off the soft, Ferelden style bed and surprised her by gently and carefully removing the boots she wore one by one. The tenderness in the way he lifted her leg slightly up with one hand to remove the boot with the other in a slow manner, had Evelyn choking on tears. Regret flood every inch of her body, regret for throwing those unjust accusations at Cullen. Because right now he handle her like Evelyn was fragile, like Cullen was afraid to break her.

"When I first saw you, you were nothing I pictured a noble being. You were bloody and bruised, dirty and tattered but you didn't seem to want to clean every morsel of dirt off of you." Cullen confessed, his warm Ferelden voice gentle as he placed the boots over to the side though he remained kneeling on the floor. "The first time I saw you at Haven, I saw only a troubled past and a bright future. You were the type of woman to use her faults as weapons, as lessons."

Evelyn broke at each word.

But he continued on talking.

"And as we continued talking, either through letters or in person, I began to forget your noble birth with each lovely conversation. I saw you as you, a woman with broken dreams but fiery determination." A pause. "Before I knew it, I was falling for you and still am. Even knowing your past, I only see a strong, capable, intelligent, funny woman whose first confession to me was her love of my scar." Cullen finished with a chuckle but the sound was drowned out by Evelyn's sudden broken cry.

Trembling hands covered her damp eyes as Evelyn wailed. " 'm so sorry for what I-I said, please don't hate me." Evelyn's begging was met with Cullen quickly clambering up to lean down over her shaking body.

"Evelyn, sweetheart, I could never hate you." Her commander promised, his warm calloused hands prying Evelyn's hands from her face. Her eyes met his amber ones and she cried more. "Oh dear..." With a sigh, Cullen sat down beside Evelyn before softly tugging her up to curl in his lap. She closed her eyes at the sensation of his clever fingers running through the hair she keeps forgetting to cut.

They stayed like that for several minutes, his fingers carding through her hair and Evelyn melting into blissful contentment that only Cullen could give her.

"She's not done with me just yet, you know." Evelyn stated once she finally calmed down all of the way, her body holding no more stiffness. "Petra will throw a couple more lords at my face, a few hateful letters until I drag Maxwell into this mess." Cullen laughed and Evelyn found herself loving that sound more than his smirk.

"Oh? I'm sure it's nothing we can't handle. Together." Together. Such a word warmed Evelyn, her lips curling into a sweet smile.

In truth, Evelyn never pictured herself ever being together with someone. She preferred the thought of traveling city to city, leaving behind wishful men but never actually settling down. Evelyn thought of herself more of a wanderer than a starry-eyed lady waiting for her prince. Oh no, that would never be her.

Yet here she is. In the arms of a man Evelyn found herself chasing after since the beginning of this mess and she wouldn't have it any other way.

 _I love you._  


	22. Forgive to Forget

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn and Cullen gets closer, Evelyn watches all the possible romances blossom around her and Morrigan gives helpful advice

Laughter.

Something Cullen haven't heard Evelyn do in a long while. Lately, either in bed or talking about nothing on the battlements or eating their evening meal together, Cullen couldn't make her eyes light up with utter joy. That joy no doubt came from Dorian who liked whispering naughty embarrassing things into her ear in attempts to distract her from the game she's heavily invested in. She nearly gave in to tossing a gold into the building pile of silver, but that was because Evelyn was quite tipsy after three tankards of ale and the game of Wicked Grace started only thirty minutes ago.

Not that Cullen minded. If it meant that getting drunk with all of her friends would keep Evelyn's mind off of her family and other depressing things, Cullen would gladly deal with a grabby drunk Inquisitor every evening, just so she could have her peaceful moments.

"Lady Ambassador, you are a cheater and you know it." Evelyn accused lightly, no heat behind her words as Cullen watched the flushed faced woman toss her cards down yet again.

"All is fair in love and war." The ambassador teased, laughing when Evelyn dropped her forehead onto the wooden table.

"Where's my Seeker? She's not here yet." Evelyn whined and Cullen could only chuckle at her childish display. It was endearing, really.

"Now that you mention it, I did invite her. Cassandra didn't exactly refuse the offer." Varric shared after setting his cup of beer on the table. Cullen noticed that Varric made sure to invite everyone to tonight's game of Wicked Grace. Bull sat at the head of the table because of his big form. Blackwall sat next to Josephine on one side while, surprisingly, Leliana sat on the other. Vivienne decided to grace everyone with her presence twenty minutes into the game and so she took the seat at the end of the table, directly across from Bull. Dorian sat at Bull's left with Evelyn sandwiched between the mage and Cullen.

Eventually Varric had to drag over a table when Sera came dropping in, popping down into the pile of silver. And so Sera perched herself beside Varric and Solas, the mage elf looking none too pleased to be sitting next to the girl. So one spot remained, on the right of Varric since Cole decided to lay down in front of the fireplace to mindlessly talk about chickens.

Cullen knew that everyone in the inner circle had their differences, Vivienne's bitchiness the main cause of it all, but for once, they all put it to the side to enjoy this night. The commander knew that this was their attempt at cheering their Inquisitor up and by the way she was laughing, the smile reaching her eyes as she threw back insults, the inner circle were doing a good job at doing just that.

When the tavern door opened, the door hitting the wall harshly, Cullen knew it had to Cassandra and apparently Evelyn thought the same too.

"Well, about bloody damn time, Ca-" Evelyn suddenly stopped speaking. This caused Cullen to look at her face for any signs of discomfort, worry twisting his gust when he saw just that. And when she said nothing more, Cullen's eyes glided over to the door to see Cassandra yanking Arik in behind her, making the young templar nearly trip over his own feet.

"My apologies, Inquisitor but since he is my charge, I thought it would be wise to bring him here with me." Cassandra sounded sincere as the Seeker handed the man over to a soldier that followed the duo. Arik was then escorted to the back table, slightly out of sight.

"No, it's fine. I'm just glad you made it." Evelyn smiled, hiding the hurt quickly before anyone saw it but Cullen did. Evelyn wasn't hurt that Cassandra brought Arik here. His love was hurt because of what Arik did, her mind sobering enough to remember it. And that show of hurt had Cullen twinging his fingers with hers in show of support.

She gave a real smile.

*************

 _Out of sight, out of mind._ Evelyn kept repeating that to herself but her mind wouldn't stop wandering back to the fact that Arik was here, in this tavern, watching how she interacted with her inner circle and most likely damning her for being happy.

"Quit, darling." Dorian insisted, whispering the words into her ear with his Tevinter accent. Damn her distant cousin for being so sharp minded. Evelyn started to believe, that not matter what secret she planned on hiding, that man would know about it with one single glance at her.

Exhaling slowly, Evelyn bumped the mage with her shoulder as a show of thanks before looking back at the companions sitting all around her. She watched as Josephine giggled at what Blackwall whispered secretively into her ear. Wide eyed, Evelyn turned her attention to Varric and Cassandra and was surprised to see the two of them deep in conversation. And they weren't arguing. That was a surprise in itself. Evelyn began to think that was world was truly ending since the dwarf and Seeker were actually laughing!

Movement from the corner of her eye had Evelyn turning her attention to Bull. The Qunari gave her a knowing look before making an obscene gesture with his hand, only that had Dorian choking on his ale and Evelyn laughing like a crazy old coon.

"Well, I think I shall retire for the night." Vivienne announced, her prissy voice had Evelyn looking at her. Evelyn gave the enchanter a kind smile, bowing her head slightly before Vivienne made her exit from the tavern. That's when everyone, one by one, bid good night and revenge against Josephine for taking all of their coin again.

Evelyn stood to either shake hands or hug everyone before they left. Promises were made, as were condolences. Honestly, each word her inner circle said had her heart lifting, becoming light despite all that has happened. And she would be eternally grateful for each one of her beloved friends. Her supportive friends. So she gave them an honest smile, not one she uses when facing diplomats. They didn't deserve a fake smile.

"I believe you owe her an apology." Cassandra roughly pushed Arik in front of her, making Evelyn take a step back to get away from her brother. Arik glared back at the Seeker and Cassandra returned the look with a fiercer glare.

"Cassandra, nothing he'll say would make me forgive him." Evelyn stated plainly, giving her shoulders a shrug of indifference. Next to her, Cullen stepped closer as he turned his body slightly. He presented himself like a shield, a shield just for her. "Go on, take his blighted ass out of here. I don't want a forced apology. I want a sincere one."

Cassandra nodded in understanding and departed with the scowling templar. That was when Evelyn allowed the tension to roll of her body like a wave.

"Go up to bed, I just need a moment." Evelyn insisted, not meeting her commander's eyes.

"Don't be too long, all right?" Cullen gave her a quick kiss to her cheek then left her side to disappear into the darkness outside. Evelyn sighed before turning to wave Cabot good night, the dwarf that never seemed to sleep, and left the establishment.

"Oh, Inquisitor." Morrigan was suddenly there, stopping just short of bumping into Evelyn.

"Morrigan? I'm surprised to see you still awake." Evelyn watched the yellow eyed, pale woman look around nervously before she sighed.

"I just have a few letters to read and I thought to read them over a cup of whatever that dwarf has." When Evelyn rose a questioning eyebrow, Morrigan decided to elaborate on who sent the letters. "One from King Alistair, Hero of Ferelden, and Celene."

"King Alistair?" Evelyn's eyebrows shot up in surprise and the witch huffed in response.

"He got wind that I am assisting the Inquisition and since we traveled together during the blight, 'tis only natural he would check up on me. Much to my dislike." Morrigan's confession squeezed a laugh from Evelyn, one she quickly ceased when Morrigan frowned.

"I'm sorry. I'm also sorry that we haven't had a moment to talk yet. Things have been..." Her sentence veered off, ending with an open thought and it was something Morrigan quickly understood.

"'Twas not your fault, Inquisitor. I'm just glad to be here." Morrigan smiled as the feathers on her shoulder moved with the cool mountain wind.

"Well, good night, Morrigan." Evelyn started to move around the mage to make her way into the keep but a sudden touch of a hand on her arm froze her in place.

"With your title, brings great responsibility, brings great enemies, and may turn a once friend into foe. But any foe can be reverted back. Your family? Easily fixable. You just need to see that and once you do, you give them your all. You show those who once loved you how they hurt you and what they lost. Show them and they'll follow."

And she left.

Those words echoed in Evelyn's mind as she stood there in front of the tavern, her eyes glued to the ground below her.

Evelyn knows one thing for certain:

She doesn't forgive easily anymore. 


	23. At What Cost?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which -Insert summary here-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long update! I'm working on a ME fanfic so that has a good amount of my time while I plot things out in my little head. But we're finally back with a DA update! :D

A swipe here. A slice there. Metal meets scales, meets exposed flesh and gets rewards with a spew of blood and a glorious sounding roar from the dragon. Fire followed the cry and soon a screech. An ear piercing shriek that had dragonlings charging towards Evelyn and her teams as they fought the dragon dubbed as Ferelden Frostback.

"Please deal with them, Varric!" Evelyn insisted, loudly since she was afraid that the dragon's roar might drown out her order. But the rogue heard perfectly well and turned his attention to the incoming enemies as Evelyn, Bull, and Vivienne dealt with the main enemy.

A day or so ago, Evelyn surprised her companions with a sudden dragon hunt. Many backed out, not daring to get scorched by the beast's flames but Bull placed himself in her small teams without hesitation. Varric agreed to tag along, stating that he had some experiences with dragons and so wanted to be there to give points to the newbie that was Evelyn. And Vivienne reluctantly agreed, saying that it was always good to have a mage with Evelyn. Always.

So, to the rest of her friends, Evelyn gave strict instructions as to not let Cullen find out about the hunt. If her commander found out, Evelyn would find herself locked in her tower until she promises not to risk her life just to fight a powerful creature. And that was the reason why Evelyn wanted to fight the dragon. For one, the blighted things has been terrorizing the Hinterlands for Maker knows how long. Second, she promised herself and those who lived there that she will resolve the problem as soon as Evelyn was better equipped. And lastly, it seemed like a good way to let out built up anger.

And it was.

Before Evelyn left Skyhold, she had to see her 'brother' off. She didn't speak a word to him, no good wishes or broken promises. Evelyn simply waved and nodded at the man as he was escorted out of the fortress by a glaring Seeker and not too pleased looking Inquisition soldiers. On top of seeing her least favorite sibling leave, at least now he was, Evelyn has yet to get word from Maxwell. She was itching to know just how many more family members of hers hated Evelyn.

And honestly, she didn't enjoy the thought of her big brother thinking ill of her nor frowning at every mention or sight of her name.

So here she was, dodging each swipe of the dragon's claws just to dig her daggers in the beast's flank. Evelyn could hear Bull's laugh above the noise, could feel the air stir with Vivienne's icy magic and that icy magic downed the dragon. Evelyn had to roll out of the way quickly just before Vivienne summoned a wave of sharp ice to pierce the dragon in the face, the sharp tips making a home in the beast's eye sockets.

The dragon's roar came out more like a gurgling cry before it collapsed onto its side, wings coming down to hang limp over the lifeless body. Evelyn's breath whooshed out of her lungs as a relief sigh, a smile etching itself onto her heated, sweaty face. The battle seemed like it took ages to end but it did eventually and Evelyn felt great. More than great. Powerful. Like she could take on Corypheus right now and kick his ugly ass.

Apparently Bull felt great after that battle too. He was, in fact, cheering with unrestrained joy and adrenaline, adrenaline Evelyn hopes will soon dissipate.

"Well, that was indeed something." Vivienne breathed out, using her staff to lean onto. From what Evelyn can see, the enchanter seemed to come out of the battle unscathed, saved for some minor burns to exposed flesh but she had no serious wounds. Aside from seeing her team barely harmed, Evelyn was grateful they weren't ranting about how crazy their Inquisitor was for fighting a dragon.

But it was fun.

"All right, then. Let's see if there's anything useful around here then we'll return to Skyhold for some much needed rest." Evelyn informed as she slid her daggers onto her back, watching Bull pry something out from the dragon's gaping mouth.

A tooth. Why a tooth? It was something Evelyn was sure to question the qunari about since she isn't well educated in qunari customs. But for now, Evelyn eagerly awaits the celebration she'll throw once she's back at Skyhold. Oh the story this one will be.

*************

_Dear Curly Haired, Smirking Man,_

_'Tis I, Inquisitor Bad Luck, reporting in after much neglect of doing so. Much to your unsurprise (if that is even a word) I went to the Hinterlands to gather crafting resources and healing agents we were in short supply of. And while the visit started uneventful, I am glad to let you know that the once constant threat of the dragon has been dealt with. Just a hour ago, actually and I feel like I could still feel the beast's fire._

_It'll be a grand telling when I get back to Skyhold, which should be within a week if our luck holds out and we aren't greeted with a snow storm. And if you're frowning right now, stop it. I know you don't want me to ever fight the dragons I happen to always run across but never engage. But I needed to do this, had to do this. If I told you my true purpose of going to the Hinterlands, you'd have me locked up and wouldn't see me until I promised to never think of fighting the beast._

_I mean, I didn't really lie about coming here. We did need supplies and you know it. So by the time this report gets to you, I should either be there or a days out, it depends on how long our lovely Spymaster keeps this from you since I did write a separate report for her. Let's just say I insisted that she'd keep you out of the know for as long as possible._

_From yours with love,_

_Out with the Inquisitor, in with the Dragon Hunter_

"A dragon?! Is she bat shit crazy or what?!" Cullen yelled, crumbling the report he just finished reading before throwing the blasted paper across the room, narrowly missing Dorian. He knew, he just knew that something wasn't quite right with how she left for the Hinterlands. Usually Evelyn brings along a good portion of the inner circle for further adventuring or material gathering. Hell, she always took Dorian wherever she went but here the Tevinter mage is now, standing in his office with a smug grin on his face.

"Oh, please do lighten up a bit. At least now we know our Evelyn is back to her usual self." Dorian said, uncrossing his arms before taking a few steps towards his unbalanced desk, which was frankly, beginning to annoy Cullen.

"Her fought a dragon, Dorian. Evelyn, excelling at close combats, fought a beast that could easily rip her to pieces. She had to be very close to that blighted thing to kill it." Cullen explained as he walked over to his extremely small window. While he enjoyed the cool breeze that seeped through the gap, Cullen's eyes picked up a raven haired woman riding on the back of a beautiful white horse race down the bridge of Skyhold. "Ah, she's back."

Cullen left the window and rounded his desk to greet the woman he would very much like to yell at. But before he could reach the door, a hand pulled on his arm to stop the commander.

"When Bull gladly volunteered for Evelyn's mad mission, I was terrified at the thought of that damn qunari dying or getting hurt. However, I trusted that he'd come out of that fight victorious and return to Skyhold. I trusted him, trust him, and I expect you to do the same with Eve." And with that, Dorian strolled passed Cullen to congratulate those who successfully beaten the embodiment of raw power.

He was right though, Dorian was. Cullen had to trust Evelyn. He knew that she wouldn't suggest such an idea without first knowing if she and her companions were prepared for it. And in truth, Evelyn came out of that battle looking better and stronger than ever. Cullen watched as their Lady Herald dropped down from her horse with a smile he hasn't seen in months. It was breathtaking.

"Sometimes she reminds me of Elissa." Leliana's smooth accented voice spooked Cullen from his thoughts when he came to a stop at the back of the crowd. He looked at the Spymaster but said nothing because there really wasn't much to say.

"Which is not always the best, in all honesty." Morrigan added when she stopped beside the two advisors. The witch gave a soft smile as she watched the Inquisitor interact with her people. "Elissa, for all the good she has done, the world hasn't treated her kindly."

"Yes and I fear the same for Evelyn. When Corypheus is dead and peace is restored, what more will Thedas ask from her?" Leliana spoke softly, her voice filled with concern. Cullen looked back and forth between the grim faced women and soon he shared the same frown.

"Hawke did what she thought was right but many still blame her for what happened, not allowing her to live free without accusation." Morrigan shared then gave a small wave when Evelyn managed to notice her. "I was glad when Elissa finally managed to settle down, at least I thought she did but Fate plays a cruel hand in things and so her obligations continue."

"So the question is- what will Evelyn have to give up to give herself peace?" Leliana asked before Morrigan whisked her old companion away to discuss things privately. But even minutes after the conversation ended and he headed back to his office, the discussion still ate away at him. He wanted Evelyn to have peace, to have the right to settle down and enjoy being away from her family. But...

At what cost? 


	24. Shatter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which...woah

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're back! I'm so sorry for the huge delay in updates but Skyrim is a thing. And getting addicted to it is also a thing. Who knew? But if any of y'all have a PS3 or PS4, add me.   
> Bob_Cat71

"Cullen." Evelyn whined, her voice slightly muffled as she pressed her mouth into the commander's neck. The curly haired male grinned at her childish behavior as he gently tossed her up to get a better hold on her legs.

"You have to go, you know that better than anyone else." Cullen reminded his lover while he carried her on his back as he journeyed down the stairs outside of the keep. How did Cullen end up giving the Inquisitor a piggy back ride, you might ask? Well, after the woman seemed to take her time getting out of bed and getting dressed into her gear, Evelyn crawled across the bed on all four just to bring her arms around the commander's neck.

He, of course, was busy with his boots and thankfully was done with them by the time Evelyn decided to make a very distracting move. She rained kisses down upon his jaw, neck, and behind his ear and Cullen very well knew what she was planning on doing. His lovely Inquisitor wanted to stall. Cullen knew the woman didn't want to travel out to the cold hell, Emprise du Lion, which she despised. But Evelyn had to. Cullen handed her an important task involving that place and the Inquisitor was determined to do something for her commander.

But she wasn't ready to venture out to that cold place and Cullen knew she was doing whatever it takes to spend at least a couple more moments in their warm bed, since she wouldn't have one for quite a long time.

So Cullen had to urge Evelyn, had to remind her that she had to go to Emprise du Lion and after a few stubborn words from Evelyn, she finally agreed to leave but only if Cullen would carry her to her horse. And he did. With her legs tight around his waist, Cullen carried her through the Main Hall of the Keep and out into the courtyard. Sure, they got a few weird looks from the Orlesian nobles, even a few women giggled behind their ever present fan but Cullen didn't mind how normal he and Evelyn acted.

They didn't appear like a Commander and an Inquisitor. They seemed like two love-struck teenagers trying to finally be something they're not, or aren't allowed to be. And even if those Orlesian nobles didn't understand how much Cullen and Evelyn wanted a normal life, the Inquisition soldiers did. The men and women of the Inquisitor's army looked on with smiles, a few winks and whistles here and there.

"Why couldn't the place be in the Emerald Graves? That place was so pretty." Evelyn said on a sigh. She loved that place, even though it was filled with Giants. Cullen, on the night she returned from the place, listened to the stories Evelyn told with interested ears. She was in awe of the greenery the place possessed. Evelyn even described the villas it held and dreamed of having a villa of her own there. That was when Evelyn told him of the haunted villa she explored and she assumed, put the place to rest. From what Cullen could tell, Evelyn silently called dibs on the villa now that it wasn't crawling with undead.

"There's been reports of dragons at Emprise du Lion. I thought that would at least make you a tad bit excited to go there." Cullen announced.

Evelyn laughed, a soft, light sound Cullen relished in hearing since it'll be a while until he'll hear it again. "Don't get me wrong, that excites me but I'll probably be too numb and cold to actually enjoy the fight." Cullen shook his head at Evelyn's growing hatred for the cold. That was one out of many things the woman shared with her distant cousin...their distaste for the cold.

"Dorian!" Evelyn's voice boomed in Cullen's ear, causing him to flinch. The Herald wiggled her legs back and forth and Cullen took that as a sign to let Evelyn go so she could run up to the mage standing by their horses. 

"And usually I'm the late one." Dorian said, the 'vint shaking his head at his best friend in a fond manner. Cullen watched as the two of them immediately dove into their usual ways. This involved Evelyn and Dorian having no concept of private space, Evelyn's arm instinctively linking with the mage's. Their ease with each other made them look like lovers to those who didn't really know the facts. Like Mother Giselle. 

That woman held no punches when it came to her dislike for the Tevinter mage. On several occasions, Cullen had to calm Evelyn down before she punched the Chantry Mother for the things the blight hen said about Evelyn's closest friend. Sure, Cullen heard the nasty rumors and he didn't agree with them, he even hated him but they were just rumors. Evelyn held no love for rumors. 

And since Cullen was occupied with his thoughts, he didn't notice Evelyn's inner circle crowd around her and her small traveling party to wish good luck and give a few items that'll help against the cold. A sudden pat on his shoulder had Cullen focusing on the now rather than the past.

"I don't like the reports my scouts have been giving me. I just hope our lovely Inquisitor doesn't run into any major problems." Leliana informed the commander and her words stirred something in him.

"I'm sure Blackwall and Cassandra will keep her out of trouble." Cullen said but he wasn't quite sure that was entirely true. He knew the two warriors weren't immune to surprises and that only worried Cullen more. He didn't like this.

At all.

****************

"Just get in there and stop what they're doing. I don't care how you do it, just get it done." Cullen ordered to the two men standing in front of him.

"I'll round the men up, chief." Krem announced before departing Cullen's office.

"Cullen." Bull spoke after several seconds since his second left the room. The qunari's voice had Cullen looking up from his massive mound of papers that always seem to keep growing. And just when Bull opened his mouth to say something, a scout barged into the room which ceased whatever conversation he and Bull was about to have.

An unexplained feeling filled Cullen as he looked at the grim faced scout. He felt his stomach plummet before rushing out from his office with Bull following close behind. He headed straight for Leliana's tower, knowing perfectly well that their Spymaster was first to receive the news and most likely still had the letters.

"I insist on going." Morrigan's voice rose over Vivienne's protests.

"But you aren't trained in the arts of healing, my dear." The enchanter reminded the black haired mage. Cullen appeared just in time to see the Hero of Ferelden's old friend glare at the woman beside her.

"When I traveled with the Hero of Ferelden, we had a healer among our band of misfits. So naturally I picked up a few things from her." Morrigan argued back which had Leliana sighing heavily.

"You both are going and that's finally. Even if Morrigan can't heal as well as you, Madam Vivienne, she can still fight. Those roads are dangerous, remember?" The Orlesian Spymaster resolved the dispute and looked up to see Cullen head towards them. "Commander, I'm sure you came to read this." Leliana concluded and held up a quickly written letter 

_ Spymaster, _

_ I request that Madam Vivienne head over to Emprise du Lion this instant. Inquisitor Trevelyan has been injured,  _ _severely, and sadly we are too far away from camp. We also can't leave to get assistance because that'll leave Dorian and the Herald vulnerable since the keep has yet to be cleared out. So right now, we're set up in what looks to be a storage room in Suledin Keep. Any map can tell you were that is located._

_If you want details on how the Inquisitor got injured, that will have to wait since getting her healed is our main priority. So when she is healed and well, I'll have her send her own report on the events that occurred._

_The Seeker,_

_Cassandra_

"I'm sure Dorian is doing his best but he isn't a healer. Far from it." Bull said after reading the letter over Cullen's shoulder. Cullen didn't realize that his hand were slowly making a crumbled mess out of the letter until Morrigan gently took the abused paper from his trembling hands.

Evelyn never got injured. Well, she did but not to the point where it took her out of commission. No, she was too quick. Whenever he and Evelyn dueled, the commander had a hard time keeping up with her speed. She was smart and quick when it came to dealing with enemies. So something big and surprising must have caught her unaware.

"Cullen." The yellow eyed mage said softly as she handed the letter back to Leliana. "I promise you that Vivienne and I will do whatever it takes to get Evelyn back on her nimble feet so she can continue terrorizing poor rams in the Hinterlands." 

"Well, shall we depart?" Vivienne glided on by without sparing Cullen a look. Instead, Morrigan gave him an extremely rare smile that was full of confidence before following the enchanter.

Cullen knew that Morrigan would keep her word. Not once has she betrayed the Hero of Ferelden nor broke the trust the warrior immediately placed upon the witch. 

"Now, we wait." Cullen finally found his voice while he took a seat on the chair Leliana usually sits in. Instead, without a word, the Spymaster headed over to her little alter to pray. Something Cullen neglected on doing.

"If Evelyn is one thing, it's stubborn." Bull said as he skimmed over the letters collecting on Leliana's table. 

"Oh, she's stubborn all right."


	25. Remembrance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which feels and lots of 'em.

_She took aim. Her posture remained straight but not stiff as Evelyn pulled back the bowstring. She breathed in a good amount of air before exhaling more slowly than she inhaled. Once doing so, her hooks fingers released the string and her eyes watched the speeding arrow travel across the courtyard. Evelyn smiled, a smile full of pure innocence and pride, when the arrow embedded itself in the practice dummy's chest._

_This had her whipping around to grin at her clapping father whom smiled back at her with the same amount of pride._

_"Did you see that, papa?" Evelyn asked but she already knew the answer. Yet she wanted to hear her father's awe filled words as her training finally showed good results._

_"Not as good as your dual wielding skills but impressive none the least. Good job, little dove." Lord Davik reached down to ruffle his daughter's dark hair. Evelyn relished in the fatherly touch. It was something she couldn't quite get from her mother. Lady Trevelyan only seemed to scold Evelyn for everything she apparently done wrong and never praised the poor fifteen year old._

_"A girl shouldn't fight." Arik protested from his spot on the stairs. Evelyn didn't respond to Arik's constant distaste for Evelyn's training. Instead the young lady rolled her eyes while her father shook his head at the annoying, whiny brother._

_"If she wants to learn, she can learn." Lord Davik said and that was that. Even though Arik and Petra Trevelyan hated the fact that Evelyn was tossing away what it was to be a lady and tradition. The women born or married into the family had to the duty of spreading the family's influence. And to do that, they were married off to large noble families, were pressured to pop out as much males as possible, and get well acquainted with the Game. It was stressed that the women had to attend as many parties and host just as much. Court and parties had to be their hobbies._

_But Evelyn's father liked the idea of finally changing things up a bit. Davik was never fond of rules nor traditions. He liked doing what was right because it was right and because tradition and rules told him to. Not Petra however. When Evelyn's mother was married into the family, Davik's mother carefully and sternly taught Petra all the traditions of the Trevelyan family. And Petra loved it all. The woman liked the idea of everyone having a place in the family with their designated duties._

_So naturally, Davik and Petra butted heads over this but over and over again, Lord Trevelyan assured his children that he loved their mother._

_"You're just mad because she can kick your arse." Maxwell teased once the eldest boy walked out into the courtyard._

_And the two boys hit the ground._

_*************_

_"I still don't understand." Evelyn said from her spot on her sitting room chair. Her fingers fiddled with the awful folds of her skirt, her hands itching for the comfort of a dagger's handle._

_"To be completely honest, it's better if you don't understand." Davik announced, his body turned away from Evelyn as he stared at the fire burning brightly in her fireplace. "If you start to understand, you'll become like your mother and really, I don't think that's what this family needs."_

_Evelyn laughed harshly at his words. "Oh? Up until now, the Trevelyan family seemed to be doing just fine with people like mother." Her handmaiden, Mira, sighed from somewhere behind Evelyn, something the young Trevelyan ignored._

_"To the void with that!" Her father nearly yelled his most used phrase. Evelyn's eyes widened at the lord's sudden outburst as he finally revealed his constant restrained fury once he turned around to face Evelyn. Just as quick as his outburst, Davik sighed while his shoulders sagged with building stress._

_Standing, Evelyn cupped her hands behind her back then took two steps towards her worn down father. "It's been two years since my training abruptly stopped. Two years of constant bullshit. And honestly, papa, I don't know how much long I can take this. I hope you, at least, understand that." Evelyn, for the passed two year, has watched her father try relentlessly to stop Petra, to make that blighted woman allow Evelyn to what she wanted with her sorry life. Evelyn was nearing her twenty-first birthday and she kinda hopes it'll be her last._

_"I do understand, little dove, I do but there is nothing more I can really do. I nearly exhausted every possible option. And it's not like I can leave your mother and send her away. To do that, I'll just start a lot of unfix-able problems." His words sounded sincere and Evelyn immediately believed him. Even if Evelyn started hating her father because of Petra, Evelyn would always know to believe her father._

_Always._

_*************_

_In truth, Evelyn wanted to barf right now. No, not out of the carriage window or have them pull off to the side so she can unload the contents from her already empty stomach. Oh no. She wanted to throw up right on the lap of the guy sitting before her. Sure, the guy would retaliate harshly but Evelyn would've been proud if it ruined his day and his lady image of her._

_"Do smile, my dear, that frown makes you look dreadful." Lord Velmont demanded with an exaggerated sigh. Evelyn had to resist rolling her eyes and instead turned her head to look out the small window._

_"Then tell a joke and maybe I'll smile." Evelyn insisted without much thought. And of course, the lord tsked at her sullen behavior and took mental note which was never a good thing. Whenever poor Evelyn retorted back with a sarcastic comment or something along the lines of one, she'll get rewarded with a firm hit anywhere but her face. Never her face. If she walked around with a massive dark, multi-colored bruise on her cheek, the news of abuse would spread back to her family and Evelyn's father will have her sent back home without hesitation. Of course, Lord Velmont didn't want that to happen._

_So when Evelyn went to go write home to her family about their progress, Velmont would carefully read it for any signs that Evelyn was telling her father about the abuse. If the lord deemed there was a hidden message in the letter, he'd smack Evelyn on the back of her head and had her rewrite the letter but instead writing each word Velmont said._

_Aside from the hitting, Evelyn had to deal with Velmont's curiously roaming hands whenever they were alone. Like now._

_Evelyn's back went ramrod straight when she felt cold fingers dance up her left leg, her skirts rising up as he went. Her skin crawled at the sensation, at the thought of his perverted hands doing away at her as they please. She hated it. Hated him. Hated all of his._

_"You're going to be so perfect for me when I'm through with you." The vile man promised, his words making Evelyn's stomach knot up with dread and disgust._

_"To the void with that." She quietly mumbled to herself. A saying, a phrase often repeated by her beloved father when he was confronted with something he didn't like. A phrase that held meaning Evelyn came to understand. The words promised change, hope, and rebellion. When spoken, actions were made and things changed, usually for the better._

_So as the lord seemed to take his time mapping out her body, Evelyn repeated the words learned from her father. They became a chant of some form. Something she would mostly recite more than the actual chant the Chantry teaches the faithful._

_To the void with that._

_To the void with that._

_To the void with that!_

_*************_

_Cullen's laugh somehow rumbled through his chest and through Evelyn as she laid sprawled over his muscled, naked body. She smiled at the sound she realized she was becoming addicted to. It was a comforting sound. It allowed her to remember that Evelyn had a different life now, that she was away from all the pain and misery._

_"I bet she was a joy to have." Cullen commented once Evelyn finished telling a story about her mischievous handmaiden that she wished was here. Without a doubt, her horrid mother probably tossed the poor elf out the door once Evelyn left._

_With a small smile, Evelyn turned her face to press a kiss to the center of her commander's chest. "Oh, she was. Back then, Mira was my only friend since we got along so perfectly well and her understanding of me was also a plus." Evelyn breathed a deep sigh as she mindlessly traced patterns around Cullen's collarbone. "If only you could meet her. You would've found her oddly fascinating."_

_They went quiet after that. Nearly five months into their relationship and Cullen heard more about Evelyn's life than she truly wanted him to know. But he was so easy to talk to, to breathe around. Evelyn didn't have to worry about him judging her over things she tried to prevent. He told her over and over again that when he looked at her, he didn't see a wounded little girl wishing she had ended her life early or a used whore. No, he saw a woman who became stronger because of what she went through._

_And she loved him for it._

_"Hey, Cullen."_

_"Hm?"_

_"I love you. No matter what, please remember that."_

_***********_

"I don't know what to do, okay?!" A strained, frantic voice pierced through Evelyn's conscious.

"Blackwall, pick her up and move her inside. We don't know if there is patrols." Another voice, one less frantic but scared none the less tickled at Evelyn. She should wake up, to calm her friends and tell them she's all right but all she wanted to do was sleep. Sleep and forget about the problems that seemed to slam into her one after another after another until peace seemed like an extremely rare luxury to her.

Suddenly, Evelyn felt her body being lifted up into the air by strong arms. This caused excruciating pain to rack Evelyn's body to a point where she couldn't produce a coherent thought.

What happened?

How did she get so injured?

Why is it so cold?

Where are they?

Evelyn couldn't remember her objective given to her when pain shattered all thoughts away. But she did manage a noise. Not really a noise to grant comfort to her panicking companions since it was like a whimper. Not like a kicked dog whimper but it was sad sounding all the same. However, her making a noise at least, presented her as not dead but rather way out of commission.

And truly, it was a sad state.

Whatever happened, Evelyn wishes it undone. She shouldn't be here with immeasurable pain blossoming in her abdomen. Oh no. Evelyn had to get the hell up and finished whatever the hell she was set off to do. She couldn't remember though which made her freak out all the more.

But right now she was about as useless as a chevalier without his sword arm.

To the void with that. 

 


	26. Fear the Fearless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Have I ever told y'all that I'm terrible at summaries? Well I am. Boom.

She felt her eyebrow twitch with irritation at her companions constant worrying. Evelyn was alive and breathing just perfectly fine so you'd think people would be a lot more chill.

Apparently not.

"Guys, I'm fine so stop worrying over me like a first time mother." Evelyn insisted with a tired sigh. "Now go do what I told everyone. Please?" Her orders involved clearing out this sad looking keep and claim it for the Inquisition. In theory, it sounded easy. However, her friends would have to confront a demon called Imshael. Evelyn stressed the fact that, in any way, should they strike a deal with the ancient demon. And as a safety precaution, Evelyn suggested that Cassandra should do the talking rather than a mage that'll accompany the Seeker and Blackwall.

"Evie, dear, please inform me against as to why I can't go with them but the healer can?" Dorian questioned for a third time.

"Because the Inquisitor's injuries aren't serious anymore. On top of that, you have exhausted yourself sick in attempts to heal Lady Trevelyan until Morrigan and I showed up." Vivienne said while she collected her staff that leaned against a nearby crate. "Lady Morrigan will stay to keep the two of you safe and make sure the Inquisitor doesn't reopen her wounds. Again."

Evelyn flinched at the stern reminder. A few hours ago, while Evelyn insisted that she was in top shape to fight, stood and attempted to stretch her stiff joints. And really, that was a horrible idea. Within 3 seconds, Evelyn collapsed to the ground in pain and spent 4 hours since then with Morrigan and Vivienne scolding her like two disappointed parents.

"Just please be careful." Evelyn begged the party of three that would rush off into battle without her careful guidance. It just didn't sit well with her to let her friends fight without her. But she trusted them to get things done and stay alive. They literally knew how Evelyn did things, usually in a cautious manner so they tend to be the same way every time Evelyn couldn't be there with them.

And so they departed after bidding good bye with Vivienne demanding that Evelyn stays still like an obedient child and for Dorian to get a few hours of sleep.

As Evelyn toyed with the bandage round her right thigh, her mind played the series of events in order. Thankfully, she decided to clear out the red templars and put an end to their mining operations before making her way over to this keep. Things were going well and when they encountered the first giant, Evelyn and her team had no problem dispatching it. The group figured they'd find a live giant somewhere in the keep since they did see a dead one with red lyrium growing from it in a cage.

However, they only expected one. Well, at least Evelyn did because she only saw two cages and one was empty, meaning that one was alive and roaming around somewhere. So when Evelyn and her team were dealing with red templars, she didn't notice a giant leave a small enclosure until it was too late. And by too late, I mean until Evelyn was thrown back by a large fist to her stomach. She went flying through the air and an archer decided he'd take this vulnerable opportunity to send an arrow into her abdomen.

And it hurt like a motherfucker.

Aside from an arrow obviously protruding from her stomach, Evelyn's head slammed back against a stone wall and she was greeted by momentary darkness. Her team, however, was swift in killing the remainder templars and tactfully dealt with the giant since they were one person short now.

It was sad, really, that Evelyn managed to slip up this badly. Surely this incident will continue to gnaw at her but it was a lesson well learned.

"Hey, Morrigan." Evelyn said as she watched a very exhausted Dorian curl up beside Evelyn, his back giving off much needed heat.

"Yes, Inquisitor?" Morrigan replied but didn't bother looking up from the wooden crate she was rummaging through.

"How did Elissa manage to stay so level headed when the fate of Ferelden was weighed down upon her?" Honestly, Evelyn was very curious as to how Elissa stayed so sane when her perfect, noble life changed in a matter of seconds. And so she asked the person who knew everything about the Hero of Ferelden. Sure, stories of Elissa didn't exactly say just how close the mage and warrior was but Evelyn had a feeling that Morrigan to Elissa was like Dorian to Evelyn. You know what they say: opposites attract.

Morrigan ceased what she was doing and eventually plopped down on top of an unopened crate. "Oh, she often told me how much she wanted to box everyone in the face for always leaving it up to her to solve every little problem. Problems like getting spider venom for traps or delivering a letter to a woman in a town within walking distance. So really, it was petty problems they threw at Elissa when she had a blight to deal with and a power hungry man in Denerim."

"So pretty much like me but I had to deal with a hole in the sky rather than the blight." Evelyn said, leaning her head back against the wall she was sitting against. "I'm sure she had to deal with the same amount of political bullshit too, huh?"

Morrigan laughed softly at that and gave a simple nod. "On top of deciding whom to place on the Ferelden throne, Elissa had to decide who to put on the throne of Orzammar." The dark haired beauty went quite for a couple seconds, as if she was reliving the time she spent with the Warden-Commander. "You would think Elissa would have settled down with the newly appointed King Alistair once the blight ended but sadly, she didn't...or wouldn't."

"Why didn't she?"

Evelyn looked over to see Morrigan frown slightly at the question as she tried to think of a suitable answer. "I think once such large responsibilities are placed upon you in such a short time, you can't help but to fix more problems that haven't been voiced yet. So, in a way, Elissa got so used to being relied on, she couldn't sit still. Especially when it came to her husband."

Now Evelyn felt really bad for being so rude to a woman who went through just as much hardships as Evelyn but continues to selflessly help people.

"Just how close were you with Elissa?" Evelyn asked. She knew the story of the infamous mage disappearing right after the archdemon died but Evelyn wondered how hard it was for Morrigan to leave like that so suddenly.

"She's the only one I would truly call my friend. Best friend even. Elissa listened to every rude opinion I had on pretty much everything and took it into consideration so she could please everyone. She listened to the stories I told and even gave such heart felt gifts." A pause. A thoughtful one at that. "Sure, Leliana is my 'friend' and it's fun teasing her but Elissa was something entirely different to me."

"You know, shortly after the events at Adamant, Elissa visited Skyhold." Evelyn confessed and she felt Morrigan's unnerving eyes quickly latch onto her.

"Is she all right? Did she tell you what she was doing?" Evelyn never heard Morrigan sound so concern, not even when the Herald of Misfortune was badly wounded. The high level of concern almost made Evelyn laugh.

"Aside from appearing exhausted when I saw her, the Queen was doing just fine. And as to what she was actually doing, it was searching for a cure for the Calling." Evelyn informed and Morrigan just shook her head with a fond smile.

"Always a busy body, she." The fondness quickly turned serious as the mage looked at Evelyn with a level stare. "To answer your first question, she herself didn't keep her sane. No, it was the people around her that did. Leliana and I told her stories. Zevran and Oghren gleefully told jokes. Sten, our own fellow Qunari and future Arishok, taught her strategic battle plans and what it was to be a warrior. Wynne became our groups mother and often gave Elissa advice. Shale...well...was Shale. But Alistair was Elissa's main source of sanity and for that exact reason was why I tolerated that dim-witted man."  

Evelyn didn't try to comment on what Morrigan said, she couldn't. If it weren't for Elissa's companions, the warrior would have went to the Deep Roads and stayed there. And here Evelyn was, hating the woman for Cullen's past crush on her.

"Well said, Morrigan." Dorian smiled.

************

_Dear Inquisitor,_

_I have received your report on what happened and I'm pleased to know that you're doing all right. Just know, Cullen had a mild panic attack and since been busy with work to occupy his mind from ill thoughts. So, please, when you seem him, greatly apologize. You stressed our important Commander, Herald, shame on you._

_Also, I'm not so eager to inform you that when you return, there will be two guests waiting for you. Sadly, they made me promise not to include their names in this letter since they wanted to surprise you. I'm not quite sure if it will be a good surprise or a bad one but when you return, I advise you to take a seat before I introduce them to you. And please, don't let this bother me, it's bad enough that it's bothering me and I've allowed it to show. That never happens._

_May your journey back be swift and uneventfully._

_Sincerely,_

_Lady Nightingale_

*************

Dread. Yes. Dread. That was what Evelyn was feeling when she traversed down the length of the Keep's Main Hall. It's been three days since she received that letter via raven and it was when they just left Emprise du Lion. After reading it, Evelyn immediately knew it was something bad. Like really bad. Like she wanted to run away bad or stay up in her tower for a week bad. 

Narrowing her eyes, Evelyn sat herself on her Ferelden style throne she preferred over the Inquisition issued one. It looked too serious for her. Every time Evelyn would sit in that red chair, she felt like she had to look stern and mean looking. So when they got the resources and gold, Evelyn quickly requested a fur covered, wooden made chair that looked a lot less intimidating.

"Oh, Inquisitor." Cullen was suddenly there, seeming to have just left the Undercroft. Probably there to talk to Dagna about red lyrium and whatnot. 

Evelyn felt herself grimace at the fact she didn't go see him first when she returned. Hell, she didn't go see anyone, not even a bath. So here she was, a filthy mess in her ruined traveling clothes with her hair no doubt falling out from its braid. 

"Please don't be mad, Cullen." Evelyn begged as she started to bring her legs up to curl in the furs of her chair. Cullen gave her a considering look before he chuckled at her sad state.

"I'm not that mean." He gave her a heart fluttering grin before casually sitting down on a arm rest of her chair. "When you're all clean and fully healed, that's when I'll give you a firm lecture."

"Oh?" Evelyn raised an eyebrow and regarded his lean form. "With our clothes on or clothes off?"

"Maker..." Cullen sighed, her words making the man blush but really, he didn't specify. So Evelyn couldn't help but to tease him. "By the way, I met your guests and I have to say-"

"Evelyn!" Her name was called by an all too familiar voice. It had her scrambling up in her chair despite her body protesting against it but she had to see him to make sure she didn't hallucinate.

Maxwell.

A smile immediately bloomed on her face and just when she was about to rush off the chair and into her brother's arms, Cullen's arm was there holding back. Confused as to why he did that, she met Cullen's warning look with a frown until looked back at her brother to see what had Cullen so protective.

Nope. 

No.

No way.

Why?

Panic rose up inside of her. Evelyn could've sworn she could start hyperventilating any moment now and it was because the man following her brother was the last man she wanted to see. Oh this was a surprise all right and honestly, Evelyn started to despise surprises. Sure, she liked the whole Hawke surprise but sort of the Elissa and Alistair surprise. But she hated the 'Hey, I invited your parents to the ball' surprise and the 'I sent your brother Arik and he might try to kill you' surprise. 

This surprise created a whole new level of hate.

Evelyn straightened her posture and wiped all emotions off her face as she acknowledge her brother and his follower with a cool gaze. "Welcome, Lord Trevelyan and Lord Velmont. I was informed of your sudden arrival and as blessed as I am that you both are here, might I ask as to why you are?"

Seeing how Evelyn somehow managed to school her emotions in, Cullen dropped his arm to his side but didn't move from the armrest and Evelyn was grateful that he didn't.

Maxwell made a frown at Evelyn's sudden icy attitude but didn't comment on it. "Well, so happens that your fiance managed to survive the Conclave with a few injuries and didn't return back to the Free Marches until 2 months ago. When he came to visit, Lord Velmont requested that I'd escort him to Skyhold to 'collect his future wife' as he put it."

Anger replaced the fear. Angry at how this weasel managed to survive an incident that kill many good, innocent people. Then it dawned at her. He wasn't there. No, the lord, after dropped Evelyn off at the temple, went off with a few other lords to find a good tavern and a wench to occupy their time. So the story Velmont must've told Maxwell was a complete lie but Velmont wanted him to look like the injured party.

"I am also here to apologize formally on behalf of Arik's actions towards you and it seemed I wanted to see the little sister I haven't seen nor heard from since your departure to the Conclave." Maxwell added but it didn't nothing to soften the bubbling anger inside of Evelyn.

"Yes, came here to apologize and to also throw me back at the man I dread being with. How nice of you, brother." Evelyn's smile was bitter and held no warmth.

"You have no say, girl." Velmont had the balls to say and actually, it impressed Evelyn. The man had the guts, while standing in her fortress full of her loyal soldiers, nobles and common folk, to bluntly belittle the Herald of Andraste. Evelyn even wanted to give the man a round of applause for his balls of steel.

"Neither do you, boy." Evelyn challenged back with a satisfied smirk when the lord's eyebrow twitched.  She then turned her attention to her waiting brother and gave him a polite smile. "Seeing how you're the head of the family now and honestly, you don't even like the man, you can dissolve the arrangement."

"You do have an extremely appealing point, little sister." Maxwell flashed a grin he and Evelyn often shared when they were little before doing something that'll get them in trouble. "And besides, I've been informed about your courtship with your Commander here by your Spymaster and I'm pleased with the pairing. Congratulations, Evelyn." If Lord Velmont wasn't standing next to her brother, Evelyn would've tackled Maxwell into a giant bear hug.

"You little-" Velmont's sudden movement forward caused something to tumble out of his sleeve and roll across the stone floor. Cullen stood at attention when Evelyn stood up and walked over to the small object out of curiosity. When she bent over to pick up the clear flask with something red pulsing in it, Velmont was already there trying to take it back. But Evelyn was quick and within a few short seconds, she had the cool blade of her dual bladed dagger pressing into the neck of the stupid Free Marcher noble.

"Since when?" Evelyn asked, holding the flask up to the light seeping through her multi-colored windows. Red lyrium. A deadly thing with the means to either control or kill...painfully. When Velmont didn't answer, Evelyn dug the blade a tad bit deeper until he started to whimper.

"5 months after the Conclave. A man named Samson learned of my connection to you and gave me a deal I couldn't refuse." The man didn't sound remotely sorry. Figures.

"And you were sent back to my brother with a fake story and enough lyrium to kill me. Smart but not a flawless plan. Oh well." Evelyn shrugged before tossing the vial to Cullen and her commander easily caught it even with his weapon drawn. Hell, every soldier in the hall had their weapons drawn and the nobles were blocked from getting closer. 

Slowly, Evelyn turned her gaze to the trembling man paralyzed by the threat of her blade. The sight was a beautiful one and she thought herself morbid for thinking that.

"Usually I'd have people with agendas likes yours, thrown into jail to be judged fairly and accordingly." Evelyn casually tossed out that fact and Maxwell seemed to know where this was going since he joined Cullen. "But with you, I'll risk the fearful stares of the nobles." And with that, without much effort, Evelyn brought her hand out to the right before making it swipe to the left with the blade sliding along the bared neck of Lord Velmont.

"I'm no where near broken yet, Lord Velmont."


	27. (Couldn't think of a title. Oops.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we slow things down for a bit because I realized I rushed something that is supposed to be a long game. Oops yet again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to take time and thank everyone who is reading this shitty fanfic. It truly means a lot to me. In truth, I started writing this for shits and giggles but then I started to actually enjoy it and I hope everyone is enjoying it too. Once I finish this one up, expect Hawke's story next. :D

Really, Cullen didn't expect Evelyn to do that. I mean, he did expect the woman to end Velmont's life in some way but not by a slice to the throat by her very own hands. Granted, the noble bastard deserved it. Cullen believed that, that man made it his life goal to screw up Evelyn when they first met. So with all Evelyn's misfortune and whatnot, it seemed that the Maker decided to take pity on the poor Inquisitor and present a reasonable opportunity to put an end to the miserable past that was finally catching up to Evelyn.

But the Orlesian nobles that fluttered about the Main Hall didn't know nor understand why Evelyn personally and so openly ended a man's life. And honestly, they would never understand why. Those children wearing adult clothing would probably find the real story a scandal and deem Evelyn unfit to lead and be a noble herself. It was sad, really. So it didn't come to a surprise to Cullen when Dorian and Varric teamed up to put an end to any possible ill minded rumors and told the cushioned truth.

Lord Velmont was Evelyn's demanding ex-fiance that was said to have died at the Conclave but instead joined up with Corypheus and planned to kill Evelyn. Boom.

They didn't go into details as to what Velmont did to Evelyn but said it was just. Most nobles seemed comfortable with that version of the story, glad that an attempt assassination was quickly ended. All of them was puzzled when Evelyn showed no remorse for what she did, a gurgling man laying on her keeps floor. In Cullen's eyes though, having knowledge of Evelyn's past, didn't see a merciless woman. Evelyn looked lighter, like a burden has been lifted off her shoulders and she could breathe easier now. Cullen was actually shocked when Evelyn didn't out right laugh. She kept her stern, Inquisitor-like composure as she ordered the guards to clean this up and send the man's ashes to his family.

"Where did Evelyn run off to?" Maxwell, someone in relations to Evelyn that Cullen didn't actually mind, asked from his place on Cullen's couch.

"Dorian most likely." Cullen said over the shuffling of papers. Wasn't even gone an hour and Cullen already had 15 reports to look over, respond to, check for the source of the problem, double check to see if everything was in order.

"She ran off to see another man and not you? I thought you two were courting or something." Cullen was glad he didn't hear accusation or disgust in Maxwell's voice. It was the complete opposite from Petra and Arik. Instead, Cullen heard a hint of humor in those words.

Chuckling softly, Cullen handed a report to one of Leliana's scouts. "A relative actually. They are so close that at one point, people thought Evelyn was dating him rather than me. The mere idea of that had me laughing for days."

"A relative?"

"Well, more like a several times removed relative. A cousin and a Tevinter one at that." Cullen explained after leaning back in his chair with a paper in hand to read.

"Tevinter? No wonder Evelyn seems to like him. She has a thing for misfits." Maxwell laughed and when his laughing suddenly stopped, Cullen looked over to see the brother lean forward with a grim expression on his tan face. "Cullen."

The serious way in which the commander's name was said, had his sighing. Presuming that this next conversation will be a serious and long one, Cullen placed the report on his desk before cupping his hands on his lap in a casual manner. "I'm guessing you want to know why she didn't hesitate in killing him?"

"Yes."

"Well," Cullen debated on whether to tell him or have the man ask the sister his neglected to contact after a year or so, maybe a lot longer. But one look at the man and Cullen knew Maxwell desperately wanted to know and didn't want to wait for Evelyn to have some time to talk to him. "Honestly speaking, it's been honed into Evelyn to never hesitate. The woman was given the duty to judge, determine, and lead. So really, there was never room for her to debate hours on end."

"But you'd think she would have given Velmont a trial of some sort, as is proper." Maxwell said, confusion etching onto his face.

"In truth, none of the trials was proper in the first place. Evelyn wasn't trained to judge but because she was the one to sit on that big chair, she had to determine every just punishment for those brought before her." Cullen paused, his mind flashing back to the first judgement and Evelyn looked absolutely terrified. That poor woman thought she would make an mistake that wasn't fixable. 

But as time went on and more people were brought before her, it was as if she already assessed the situation and determined a solution before sitting on that chair. The punishments were delivered swiftly and really, it left everyone satisfied. Well...mostly everyone. Especially not Florianne. Each time Evelyn passed her, the ex-duchess would glare hatefully at the Inquisitor.

"But as to why Evelyn didn't have the man apprehended was because of the things he did to her just before the Conclave." Cullen came back to the present, "your mother wasn't very good at picking suitors, to be honest."

Maxwell's face paled, most likely thinking of all the possible things that brute of a noble could have done to his little sister. "And father didn't stop her?"

"Even if he tried, he couldn't." Evelyn's voice flowed down from above the two men. Cullen wasn't surprised to see the woman's leggings dangling over the edge of his loft but Maxwell seemed to be surprised. Somehow the rogue scaled up his tower, most likely with someone's help, crawled through the opening of the roof and landed feather light onto the wooden floor without alarming them to her presence. All in all, it was quite impressive and it had Cullen smirking.

"I trust you heard everything?" Cullen said and Evelyn, ignoring the ladder right next to her, dropped down from the opening and landed with a soft thud. He watched the dark haired woman straighten herself and suddenly, he wanted to scold her.

"Oh shush," Evelyn demanded without looking at her lover. "My injuries are fine." Cullen laughed at how Evelyn knew what he was going saying without him developing a proper thought before actually saying it. 

"Weren't you with Dorian?" Cullen asked, his eyes following the woman's lithe body move towards his desk. She still wore her traveling clothes, he prefers addressing her choice of armor as such, but her hair was no longer pulled back into a braid. 

"I was but I had him go gather up the rest of the inner circle for a little get together in my quarters." Evelyn informed as she thumbed through the reports Cullen abandoned. "And you're to join us, Commander."

When Maxwell cleared his throat, it had Evelyn and Cullen turning their attention to their forgotten guest. "I shall take my leave then. Pardon me, Inquisitor. Commander."

"You'll be joining us."

Cullen was taken aback by Evelyn's announcement. Her tone brokered no argument even if Maxwell seemed to have a protest at the tip of his tongue.

This will be interesting.

***********

"Hello, my little ducklings!" Evelyn greeted as soon as she cleared the stairs leading to her room. Sera, from what Evelyn could gather from the scene before her, just got done demonstrating probably something obscene on one of her bed posts. Whatever she did, it felt Dorian red faced, Bull laughing like a hyena, Vivienne holding her head like she had a migraine, Cassandra ignored the whole situation by reading the book Varric wrote for her, Solas sat next to Cole and watched the boy draw what it looks to be chickens with Morrigan staring in wonder, Josie seemed to have a heart attack, Leliana stood there grinning and most likely plotting, and Blackwall downed the rest of his wine. 

Cullen rushed over to Josie to see if the Ambassador was still alive while Varric paused his fervent writing to wave Maxwell over to them. Evelyn smiled at the endearing sight of everyone together and thankfully, not arguing. But maybe that was what Evelyn wanted. She wanted her friends to act natural and not pretend to get along for Evelyn's sake. She enjoyed how everyone could love and hate one another and still fight along side each other as one mind.

Evelyn steered herself over to the door leading to her private bath. A bath was something she greatly needed and everyone has been made aware Evelyn was planning to do just that even with all of them present in her room. It was fine though. Excluding her advisors, Evelyn spent countless days with each member of her inner circle out on the road. That caused everyone to ignore each other's privacy, joining in naked celebration every time they found a large source of water to bathe in.

"You need to get Sera a woman and fast." Dorian demanded, entering Evelyn's bathing room just when she lowered her nude self into the steaming water. Out of habit, the mage took Evelyn's tangled hair and started to gently brush through the strands.

"Have you met your other distant cousin yet?" Evelyn grinned back at the 'vint, feeling absolutely comfortable with the flamboyant man. As if one cue, Dorian handed Evelyn a small bar of soap that smelled of lavender when her hand rose from underneath the water.

"No, not yet actually. I think it's because when I looked at him I saw Arik and not the man who seemed eager to break off your engagement to that horrid pig you call at man." Dorian sniffed, thinking he was being reasonable. Evelyn laughed as she rubbed the soap into a rag before dragging it across her grimy skin.

They remained silent for a minute or two, obviously thinking about many things or just one.

"I must be sick in the head."

Dorian's hands paused at Evelyn's accusation against herself. "What makes you say that?"

"I should feel guilty for killing an unarmed man, for not giving him a trial. But oddly, I feel so much better." Evelyn confessed, her voice small and the idea of sinking down into the water and never surfacing was oddly tempting.

"You may think that but Cullen, Cassandra, Leliana, Bull, everyone else, and I do not. We understand even if some of us don't know the complete story. But if your brother can't seem to grasp the reason why, then shame on him." Dorian said and that was that. That was what Evelyn wanted to hear and it helped her ground herself. She needed to know what she did was called for even if it was  'savage'. 

But the world was better off with one less putrid shit-head.

 


	28. Back on Track

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which feels...and lots of 'em

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So! As some of you know, I've remade this. Yes, that is a thing so why am I still updating this one you ask? Well, for those eager to see how this ends or where it goes. I'm sure most of you don't really want to wait until the new fic catches up to find out the ending.

Things were oddly pleasant...peaceful even. Sure, Sera had the balls to team up with the Iron Bull in trying to convince Evelyn to open the door leading to her bathing area so everyone can bask in her naked holiness. Sera did most of the begging though and Bull just laughed, knocking on the door a couple times. But when Sera and Bull started to sing about it, Evelyn felt the air around her sizzle as Dorian's fingers sparked with electricity; electricity the mage sent zapping under the door and straight into the poor toes on the other side.

Drunk, the lot of 'em.

So when Evelyn finished getting dressed into a more comfortable attire, she stormed out from her bathing room and presented the cackling elf and the roaring Qunari with an unladylike gesture. 

The gesture involved two middle fingers standing attention and Josephine nearly having a heart attack at the sight of it.

Things didn't settle down after that, oh no. Sera tried her damnedest to get everyone drunk and if they weren't, they were tittering over the edge to drunken bliss. And Evelyn was perfectly okay with that. Over the past few months, tension has been high and it wasn't good for relaxing. The tension sparked heated arguments, snappy words being exchanged and most of the time, they hurt. 

Just recently, Dorian and Bull got into a heated argument. Blackwall and Josephine stepped in before Evelyn got the chance to but their intervention caused the Warden and the Antivan woman to start their own bout of yelling. This had Leliana walking up and promptly telling them all to get a room.

Their reactions were delightful.

"You really have changed, haven't you?" Maxwell's sudden question had Evelyn turning her attention away from Cullen, Sera, and Varric as they tried to teach Cole the 'secret handshake'. It was endearing to watch, seeing Cole's face light up when he finally got it correct and it had Evelyn smiling for him.

"Maybe I've always been this way, brother." Evelyn simply shrugged as she brought her legs up onto the couch, folding them slightly underneath her. She was looking away from him now and was instead watching Vivienne try to explain to the Seeker the difference of being and acting like a woman. Cassandra didn't understand the latter.

Maxwell laughed, his eyes still on the Inquisitor. "No, you were a quiet and shy girl. Always listened and never back talked." Evelyn frowned at that. Her eyes fell to gaze at the floor as she remembered the woman she hated being, the woman Evelyn wished she hadn't been.

"That was a girl mother forced me to be and father begged me to be. It wasn't me." Evelyn stressed the last part, hoping that he, out of the people she cared about the most, would understand.

"And sadly, I was always away from home. Otherwise, I would've put an end to it." His words had Evelyn's throat tightening up with emotions; emotions she couldn't sort out to describe which was which she was currently feeling. His words told her that he understood, that even though he was away, father told him everything that was going on.

"I miss him so much." Evelyn choked up, dropping her head to hide the tears that were surely pouring down her face. Maxwell didn't reach out to comfort her however. Evelyn was thankful though. She didn't want his pity, she only wanted his acknowledgement that their father's death has hit her hard. He did take her hand however.

"As do I. He actually supported my marriage, much to your surprise." And a surprise it was. Evelyn turned wide eyes towards him and her brother gave her a soft smile. "He supported my marriage to an elf. A dalish one at that."

Evelyn sputtered. Their father dropped hints that Maxwell got wedded to an elf rather than a noble girl from the Anderfels their mother was led to believe. Only Evelyn paid attention to father's clever words while Lady Petra laughed it off like some bad joke.

"'Tis why I was rarely ever home. Never would I bring Ellana to that dreaded place to meet that equally dreaded mother of ours. Oh no. Ellana understood though and never pressed the issue of meeting the family or telling them. Father quickly found out however and was even there when Micah was born."

"What about your return? Didn't your wife accompany you?"

"Oh she did and you should've seen mother's face when I introduced a dark skinned, pale haired elf to her. It was grand."

Evelyn laughed, her own hand tightening around her brother's and it was comforting. "I bet she threatened to kick Ellana out and disown you, brother dearest."

"Ellana, a warrior in her own right, put mother in her place before the old crow could open her mouth. Mira took Micah from my wife before punches were thrown." Evelyn brightened at the mention of her handmaiden and glad to know that the cranky elf was still with the family.

Soon, the two feel into a thoughtful silence as Evelyn nearly laughed when Bull faked tossing Sera off the balcony which had Dorian scrambling around frantically, Varric booing that it didn't happen, Vivienne shaking her head, and Cassandra trying to stifle her own laughter. Solas on the other hand, found Evelyn's desk a perfect place to sleep on, Cole sharing secrets with both Leliana and Morrigan and something he said had the two clever women blushing profusely. Cullen was out of sight with Josie on the other balcony.

"So this is your new family, huh?"

Evelyn looked at Maxwell to see a slight frown grace his lips. By the way his grip tightened even more, Evelyn knew that her brother was afraid of her answer. Afraid of the possibility that she might reject the thought, the notion, of Maxwell being her family.

"Our family was a big one and it was filled with spiteful people. You and father made the family bearable for me, made living there possible. Yet, these guys are my family..." Evelyn paused to stare out lovingly over the sea of her loved ones. "But they joined our family full of faults and falls."

*************************

"You all right?" Cullen asked as soon as everyone left their room. His question had him cupping Evelyn's face with gentle hands, thumbs sweeping up and down in a comforting motion. His concern had laughter bubbling out of Evelyn as she placed her hands over his.

"Just cleared some air with my brother, that's all." Evelyn gave Cullen a reassuring smile when he didn't look convinced by her words. Her smile, however, had him huffing out a deep sigh before pulling her body against his. "Cullen." Evelyn dragged out her lover's name before huffing out her own sigh as the commander made no move to release Evelyn from the tightening embrace.

"I wish you can go a couple months without crying. That's all I ask from the Maker." Cullen mumbled into her neck and Evelyn almost couldn't hear it with how muffled it was. Evelyn's heart clenched at the unmistakable sadness his voice held and she couldn't help but to return the embrace with almost (not really) equal amount of strength.

"Then stay by my side, Cullen. If I strike out, stay. If I yell, stay. If I cry, stay. You are my anchor and I hope I am yours."

"Never doubt for a second you aren't." Cullen said sternly and Evelyn smiled at that. She smiled at how easy it was to love such a man. She smiled at how Cullen accepted her, faults and all. She smiled at the possibility of staying with this man and growing old together. She smiled at how much this felt right, like the Maker created this very man to help piece her back together with gentle, caring hands and love her when her puzzle was solved.

"I love you." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like always, comment below on things I should change or improve on. If interested, follow me on these websites.  
>  Twitter: @MissUnluckyLady  
> Tumblr: bobcatgaming or New Name: Bobby


	29. If All Goes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Evelyn grows more and more concern and Cullen isn't liking one bit of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter but it ran into writer's block! D: Hopefully, it doesn't last.

Cullen didn't need someone to flat out tell him that something was wrong. No. By stepping foot into the Keep, he could tell by the stillness of the Main Hall that something was indeed wrong. The nobles weren't chatting about behind frilly fans or messing with Florianne. Instead, those pesky nobles stood off to the side, nervously.

"Don't ask me." Varric insisted from his usual spot in the hall. Cullen regarded the dwarf with a raised eyebrow until said dwarf pointed towards the end of the hall, where the Inquisitor's throne sat. That was when Cullen saw her. Evelyn wasn't sitting on that uncomfortable chair. Rather, she was sitting on the steps leading up to it and Evelyn looked none too pleased. She was leaning forward with her elbows resting on her knees, eyebrows drawn forward and a frown showing just how concerned their Inquisitor was.

One nod to the dwarf, Cullen made his way over to Evelyn, ignoring the sighs of relief from the nobles as they hoped the lion would calm his mate.

"Evelyn." Cullen spoke her name gently before kneeling before the dark haired woman. He watched as blue eyes flickered up to acknowledge his presences before going back to gaze over his shoulder.

Nothing more was said for several long seconds until Evelyn dropped her face into her hands and huffed out a heavy, aggravated sigh. "You'd think, after everything I've been through, the Inquisition has been through, things would cease surprising me. Bad things." Cullen frowned at her words, obviously not liking where this is going. 

"I need you to explain, love." Cullen said as he slowly and softly, peeled Evelyn's hands away from her face so the commander could give them a comforting squeeze.

Evelyn squeezed out a harsh laugh. "Where do I start? Aside from having to go out to a really large forest to find Maker knows what, I just saw something that will make this all the more dangerous...and it really stresses the "Stop Corypheus" part.

"What did you see?"

"I..." Evelyn started but snapped for mouth shut before switching her attention to the ground. "I don't know how to explain it, honestly. I never delved into ancient elven magic or history, how they used to be but from what I saw, I understood it enough to not like it...not matter how breathtaking it was." Cullen allowed Evelyn to drift off inside her own head for a few moments before he cleared his throat and drew her attention back. "If you want a better explanation, ask Lady Morrigan."

Cullen simply nodded, making no promises to seek the woman out as he stood and helped Evelyn to her feet.

"Did you know that she has a son?"

Cullen regarded his Inquisitor for several seconds before looking down at the red rug underneath them. "Leliana hinted at such a thing but she never brought up the boy in conversation. I think it was mostly for Morrigan's sake." Evelyn seemed to understand in the way she nodded.

"Inquisitor, we're ready for you." Josephine announced from the doorway leading to the war room. Cullen noticed Evelyn tense, her hands tightening around his own and Cullen wanted nothing more than to just sweep her off her feet and do everything possible to ease her worry.

***********************

"I could send my agents out to scout the area and reports back on any red templar sightings." Leliana suggested, her demeanor ever calm and Evelyn wished she possessed the ability to do that. 

"And will yours agents make it back? I would hate for them to die out there." Evelyn questioned, her arms crossed over her chest as she stared grimly at the map of the Arbor Wilds.

"They knows the risks..." Leliana paused when Evelyn glared at her. The Spymaster then cleared her throat, clearly remembering a conversation that took place months ago. "But I informed them that if they think things are going south, to return to Skyhold with or without intel." Evelyn rewarded the Orlesian with a satisfied nod before looking back down at the map.

"I still don't like any of this..." Evelyn shared with a quiet voice.

She felt every member of her inner circle and her advisors look at Evelyn and she knew, their gazes weren't filled with pity but rather, with understanding. They knew that their Inquisitor hated surprises, good or bad, and she hated going into things blind. 

"Have your agents stay off the main road since I'm sure Corypheus' army has scouts of their own. I want them gone no longer than two weeks. If two weeks are up, we'll consider them captured or dead. After which, we spend a day preparing and notifying our allies before marching out the next day at daybreak. Am I understood?" Evelyn spoke with finality in her voice as she looked up to sweep her eyes over the gathered crowd of her most loyal companions and friends.

"On your orders, Inquisitor." Cullen gave a salute before exiting the war room to notify his men of the plan. Leliana, on the other hand, strode around the table to stand at Evelyn's side.

"She's back." Leliana said with a pleased smile before leaning forward to place a gentle kiss on Evelyn's cheek. When the Spymaster leaned back, she nodded then joined Josie's departure from the room.

As soon as all of her adivsors left, Evelyn allowed her shoulders to slump in a way that greatly displeased Vivienne but honestly...Evelyn didn't give a rats ass at this moment. She just wanted her role of Inquisitor to slip away for a few moments and allow herself to be Evelyn. Evelyn Trevelyan.

"I'm getting a bad feeling...about all of this. I feel like after the Arbor Wilds, things are going to go downhill. Not right away, but eventually." Evelyn explained as she turned slightly to lean her hip against the table. "So I need all of you to be on board with me, or at least try to pretend to be."

"Tha' shouldn't be too hard, yeah?" Sera asked, grinning at Evelyn without a care in the world and Evelyn couldn't help but to grin back. Evelyn leaned her head back and huffed out a grand ole sigh.

"Y'all are my saving graces, ya know that?" Evelyn confessed then she felt a hand land softly on her shoulder. Glancing over, she watched Dorian's lips stretch into a loving smile.

"Never doubt that for a second, dove."

She never will.

Never.


End file.
